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This is the Journal for Edelsteine Calico, the Confusing Cacophony. Please do not post unless you have the expressed permission of Mintaka.

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"These wounds won't seem to heal,
This pain is just too real,
There's just too much that time cannot erase..."
-My Immortal, Evanescence


"There is order even in chaos, for chaos cannot be defined without some sort of order, no?"

Mintaka is the keeper of this journal, and mistress fo the madness in this realm. Should you need something related to this, she is the one wom you should notice. Please respect all ehr wishes to the full extent, and heed her words.

This is an In Character journal, meaning everything here is in character, except that in OOC brackets - [[]], {{}}, or (()) - and should be respected as such. Please, if you care to post, keep it IC - no OOC comments in my journal.

.o[ Permissions ]

* Edelsteine Owners have permisison to post within reason - visits, etc. or planned RPs and such.
+ Deliveries of anything may be done IC, provided they make sense. Otherwise, feel free to PM me things for Mintaka/Calico.
* If you have my express permisison otherwise.

.o[ Contents ]

01. Ivy's Post/The Gem
02. Intro/Permissions/Content
03. The Host :: Mintaka
04. The Goddess :: Calico
05. The Other Mintaka
06. Other Hosts/Deities
07. Other People
08. Pets, Items, Etc.
09. Photos
10. Backgrounds and Processions
11. Trappings
12. Terms, Notes, and Other Knowledges
13. Memories
14. Keys and Journal Notes
15. OOCness, etc.

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"In the calm of the eye of the human storm
In the house full of dreams I am safe and warm
Looking back at a life filled with warm embraces
No regrets only memories of smiling faces..."
-Brave New World, Styx


"Inside out, outside in, in through the out door."

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((Art by Prolixity))


Name: Mintaka
Age: "I don't know..."
Race: Crystaran Doppleganger
Height: 5'9"
Weight: Light
Eyes: Grey with bright gold flecks
Hair: Black
Other: Satyrish horns on head, fox ears, devil's tail, hooved feet, and wolfish hands with claws.

Personality: Confused, reserved, but not afraid to speak her mind if shefeels the need. Curious to an extent, as well.

Magics/Powers: Unknown.
Combat: Unknown.

Status: Single
Siblings: None
Children: None

Short Bio: Mintaka is the 'mortal' incarnation of Mintaka Khariel, cast off as she achieved her final stage of evolution. This was an unknown factor, considering Mintaka Khariel is pretty unique in her existence, or was. Still is to some degree. Still, while she may not be 'complete' or even wholly there anymore, she's still a good soul, filled with a new love of life and carries many of the same personality traits as her Otherself.

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Music:
01. The Tea Party - Great Big Lie
02. The Tea Party - One Step Closer Away
03. Evanescence - Whisper
04. Evanescence - My Immortal
05. Styx - Brave New World
06. Kansas - Carry On Wayward Son
07. Styx - A Day

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"I've been sleeping for a thousand ages
And I need to clear my mind
These painted mirrors give no reflection
It's getting hard to see the signs..."
-Coming Back Again, The Tea Party


"Me, Myself and I, we all like to get along."

"Madness is divinest sense, to a discerning eye..."
-Emily Dickenson, from a poem

Calico is a goddess unto herself; she is the goddess which embraces the madness, and is the 'voice' people claim to hear. She speaks to those whom have touched her 'world' - that is, her domain. While most od not know, it is true; she does have a 'world' of her own, which both exists and not - only those truly insane could ever hope to find it, or those she otherwise chosoes to let in. However, due to the rebirth she has no access, and thus, no one can, either!

There is more to the goddess then one single side, though, as she also has two other personalities which alternate with the primary goddess in dominance; there are factors however that can affect which one is dominant including situations which would pull another forward who is better suited, godly meetings requiring Calico's actual presence, or very emotional/strong thigns which would result in a depressed/sad state or a very pissed off revenge-driven psychosis. Each goddess has differing views, opinions and such on various things; some even have certain strong feelings for different people which can clash greatly.

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Calico is the 'true' goddess, she who governs the madness. She is fairly even-tempered, making her the best for dealing with most people and things. However, she does have her own set of quirks unto herself. Her first major flaw is occasional kleptomania - a need to just... take things. Particulr targets are usually small trinkets and shinies, rather then things which are merely worth something. SHe is often unaware of when she does this, which can lead to some issues.

Her memory is 'flawed' often filled awith random holes (occasionally she will re-remember things as well) or mistruths. This is partly where her title comes from, as it can be confusing to deal with what she does recall. Soemtimes her memory loss is a good thing, othertimes not so much.

Likes: Cacti, Rio, Orchids, having fun, random things
Dislikes: Pain, suffering, being helpless


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Lunara is the second 'phase' of Calico, a somber, if not depressed individual. She ahs a particular gloomy, disconnected outlook on things, and revels in the depression of others. She is often listless and discontent, slow to rise and rarely one to argue.

Occasionally when she is dominant she has an 'identity' crisis where she thinks she is male, and named Cheshire. 'Cheshire' is Lunara in a manic phase, not to be confused with Oblivia's place in the trio. Cheshire is not a distinct personality but more what Lunara is when she is not her normla self, and in a 'hyper' mood. The gender and personality confusion is a side-effect of her mood shifting, but ti does lead to some serious confusion should she, for some reason, swing into this aspect fo herself around others.

Her main flaws are her depression which can make her unresponsive to some problems, and also her manic phase. When she is Lunara her pression sometimes borders on catatonia during some phases, which can make it particularly hard to get through to her; when Cheshire is active during her phase, he is very hyperactive and can be difficult to deal with becuase he is somewhat childlike in behavior - that is, worse then Calico's own behaviors.

Lunara is called out if something gravely sad happens or something which causes Calico to otherwise want to hide away and get away from something painful that does not involve lashing out or anger.

Lunara:
Likes; Sadness, being alone, crying
Dislikes: Sunshine, happiness, being bothered constantly

Cheshire:
Likes: Getting into mischief, exploring, tinkering
Dislikes: Being interrupted when making something, spiolsports, crying


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Oblivia is the last aspect of Calico, the side few really and truly want to deal with. She is the irrational fears and psychopathic desires, wether they be to harm, to mutilate, or to kill. She is everything 'wrong' with insanity, and revels in the darkest side of the insanity. She encourages the violence, the hatred, the fears in others that have no reason or place, and lashes out with little provocation. She is one who should be handled carefully, and prone to being called out rapidly when there is a grave sitation threatening the goddess that requires harsh reaction and defense.

Oblivia's great flaws are her obvious pleasure in other's sufferings, but also her occasional bouts with irrational fears which come and go; however, to mock her or quesiton her when she ahs such is to earn her wrath as well, and she will lash out and make others suffer and delight in such. Some would consider her truly depraved, but then they say the same thing about the depths of humanity that she truly adores.

Likes: Suffering, mutilation, death, fears
Dislikes: Interruptions, rude people, jerks, overly nice people


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Music:
01. The Tea Party - Alarum
02. The Tea Party - Coming Back Again
03. Styx - I am the Walrus [cover of Beatles, yes. like this one better.]
04. Unknown - They're Coming to Take Me Away
05. Muse - Space Dementia
06. Evanescence - Imaginary

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"I don't hear a sound, silent faces in the ground
The quiet screams but I refuse to listen.
If there is a hell, I'm sure this is how it smells,
I wish this were a dream, but no it' isn't..."
-Rain, Yoko Kanno


"Two is always better then one, don't you know?"

Yes, there are two Mintakas in existence - a incident long time coming, to allow her her true birthright as inheritor of Khariel's position and a requirement to reach her final stage in life as a Kha'rendri. How does this factor in?

The IC Mintaka everyone ahs known is the green-haired one, who owns many Dreams, and has been around. The Host for the Edelsteine Calico is the "mortal" self - the part of her which was not of memory essences and of the magic of Memory. This is the side 'born' from her mother, the 'shell' which held her true self until Mintaka shed it recently

The split was rather violent, leaving blood everywhere in her room at her home in Dream. She no longer needed that blood, and was a sign of the split and final passing. THAT Mintaka - the Kha;rendri one - is the one carrying Johnathan's child, is the one most everyone knows. She hsa fuzzy memories in certain regards because fo the split, and her transformation, but otherwise is fully in tact, still bonded to the dreams, and caring for things at her home.

Thie host Mintaka was thrust into Gaia, into a location purchased awhile ago that Mintaka wanted to work on building up. However, things happened derailing the plan. But her other self was put there. The host has vague memories she can't quite remember, fleeting notions. She looks like Mintaka, except with the blakc hair and prominent gold flecks, which are almost non-present in the main Mintaka.

If she is asked about certain thigns,s eh will be very clueless, not knowing what was being referred to, and such. She has some vague memories regarding Johnathan, but not of most others she knew. Place names are like deja vu as well as some other names.

So should you encounter her, and treat her like normal Min - excpect confusion. Which is half the fun eh?

Normal Min's profile is over in Khiviance's Journal.

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"I linger in the doorway of alarm clock screaming monsters calling my name,
Let me stay where the wind will whisper to me,
Where the raindrops as they're falling tell a story..."
-Imaginary, Evanescence


"We must speak quietly, for they may hear..."

Each of the goddess' notions are in their respective colors.

Harmodius - We are worried, this is too much We think. Ah, my dearest Lord, in your purest form. We do appreciate you.
Lucius - We are not sure yet whether We should do something or not. Your sadness and suffering is a boon unto Us, but a shame on how it came. Yes, suffer, little pawn, and writhe. Oh if We had a choice in what to do you you... ahahaha!
Byrne - Such a perplexing creature.
Beryl - Your determination is admirable, Lady Wind, even though risk paid off, at what price?
Eamnonn - Hunt, the ever feral one, cunning and quick, without you things would have gone bad. So protective and loyal, always, no? You should have struck a wound anyway.
Morpheus - Childish, cocky and annoying. We would like to see you suffer far more, you stupid idiot.
Kaelin - green]At least he has made peace with his host. Odd, otherwise.
Illumin - Light you did well, although you should pay more attention to self's care. Perhaps.
Khiviance - Silenced as you are, We wonder how you deal. Perhaps this will teach something, but We suspect not. A shame. Your ways only make more for Us, for our sadness and theirs too. We would thank you for what you dp for Us, but we are still in contempt of the past. We also think you are foolish to associate with Morpehus.
Evadne - We think that she should be strong, but is very nice and thoughtful.
Echo - ... [Zero seems a good soul, Echo is... musical!]
Panacea - So caring, We do believe she is what we need most yet. We simply hope she does not try to 'cure' Us of how we are!
Kishara - Ah, the Empress' returns, how good to see life reborn again. The world needs her.
Chalybis - We suppose her host is fine, we are still evaluating.
Nergal - Ah, Underworld's host is a likeable lady! Fitting for him, as well, I think. We hope to help send many more your way, Nergal, when things are better for both of us.

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"Looking for a way to leave the world today
But the world is gonna leave us all anyway..."
-Turquoise, VAST


"Well, we simply cant just be alone, because then it would be no fun."

Mintaka Khariel :: The oiriginal Mintaka, from whence she came. She still has no idea she's not ... well.... she is. Ugh, no wonder she's so confused. Still, Mintaka Khariel is the original Mintaka, and hence, is rather important in mentioning.

Sandrien :: Once bonded to Mintaka as a protector, he still serves her and aids her now. He's very gruff, sometimes cold, and dark in all aspects. He's not above killing and often brushes people off he doesn't care for. The only thigns which seem to matter to him are Mintaka, Samsara, and himself. With occasional unmindings of the other inhabitants of Mintaka Khariel's home.

Samsara :: Mintaka's first nightmare to bond to, and one of the three eldest. She is the 'matriarch' of the "flock" of dreamkind Mintaka has, keeping the peace and defending Mintaka. She is a knowledge seeker, and attempts to ease problems without resorting to conflict unless required. She's nto afraid to fight to defend however, but she sometimes has issues grasping words to explain things. She speaks with a somewhat exotic lilt to her voice, which sometimes breaks more difficult words up a bit.

Kheviel Nightfeather :: An assassin of some 'repute' as it sems to be understood, he and Mintaka crossed paths one night when instinct forced her hand. He kills only those he deems guilty of some transgression worthy of death - usually murder or harming innocents in some way. He's looking out for Mintaka since some clan of assassins want her dead for killing one of their own or someoen they protected...

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"Like a bird with a broken wing
And the sheep in the lion's den
Gonna fall but you don't know when..."
-Billy's Got a Gun, Def Leppard


"I'm not stealing it, I'm borrowing it for a long long time."

.o[ Pets ]
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Dementia :: Dementia was aquired upon Mintaka's first stop into trying to find answers. This demonic E-mice was really meant for the other Mintaka, but now it's attached itself to this one, and likes her a lot. Amnesia is her assistant, a plake whose rather sneaky - okay VERY sneaky.

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Neurosis :: Neurosis is an 'angelic' Demon Hound, one of good heart despite it's hellish origins. Neurosis was given to ehr at the Demon Hound facility, and it sounds like there may be another to go with it. Hoo boy... The Foxx with it is named Mania.

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Psychosis :: Psychosis si the thrid 'souvenir' of ehr explorations trying to find out what's going on, a cerexi who lives up to his name. Still, somehow he obeys Mintaka although seems somehwta bitter about that. He shambles more then walks, although still seems very quiet. He has a slight destructive nature.

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Prayer :: Prayer is a daydream gifted by Mintaka Khariel to the host and goddess. Newly hatched, one can't be too sure of the details around this little one just yet! Seems very curious however. Min and Calico adore it's interesting differences, and it's curiosity, even if that includes crawling about clothing and hair and instigating giggles from tickling and careful searches to get the daydream out.

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Catatonia :: An unexpected 'gift' from Mintaka Khariel, when the other egg hatched that was with Prayer while they were visiting her. This dark little ngihtmare popped out in ehr direction and she caught it, and the bond was created. Named because it seems pretty content to sit still and do nothing right now. Twin to Mintaka Khariel's Release, a dream. Twins!

.o[ Items ]

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Aislin Thabara sent this to Us. The furin was inside the box, a very pretty japanese windchime.

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Mintaka - the one We call Ki - gave us these. They are pretty, and We love to wear them on occasions.

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We forget where this came from, but it is awfully cute. 4laugh

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"Paranoia strikes deep,
Into your life it will creep,
Starts when you're always afraid,
Step out of line they'll come and take you away..."
-For What it's Worth, Buffalo Springfield


"A picture is a thousand words, more if you make it unique."

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Ahh... the light again shall come for Us.

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To be alive again, however the world may be, is a precious gift given by Him.

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"Though my eyes could see,
I still was a blind man,
Though my mind could think,
I still was a madman,
I hear the voices when I'm dreaming..."
-Carry On Wayward Son, Kansas


"Everything that makes us up, is everything before us, and everything after will change that all the more.

.o[ Mintaka's Past ]
Mintaka is the result of several actions combined in her creation. There was no doubt that Mintaka Khariel needed to lose her "mortal" side completely - in order to keep the peace in Memory, and handle thigns in ehr father's absence, she had to. Her body was already changing, readapting even as she was unaware.

And time came, ever as Mintaka Khariel began to feel the siren's song of Calico. Calico views it as her own doing in a way, if only on the grounds of soothing the fears of the Mintaka cast into gaia as a result of the split. Calico is not lying, per se, just alleviating fears of her host. Really though, her splitting from Mintaka Khariel was simply 'nature' taking cours ein the only way it new possible - purging out the normal flesh and blood to the realm of gaia and leaving Mintaka Khariel "pure" and surviving the transition.

Mintaka, cast to Gaia, did not get the fair end of the deal. SHe was granted some memories, but they were buried, much as Mintaka Khariel ahd tried to do with them to avoid the pain, or the long forgotten childhood. Her connection to reality was already strained, and the streses of trying to understan dsimply dug further underneath.

It all collapsed when she was attacked by Shivran. Her grasp broke, slipping away as the drug flooded her system completely, breaking and eroding memories she ahd no diea about, and simply taking what seh did have and brekaing it to bits like a tornado ripping through. She was left scarred by this, and being told she was not, well, herself per se snapped somethign in ehr head and she fled. Map or no, she knew where she needed to go and ran.

She made it, without being caught, and arrived at the shop. And we all know what eventually comes from that. Bu Mintaka would embrace it, soothed by the Goddesses wordss, and a desire to be free from it all, the lies, and the falsities her own existence seemed to hold.

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.o[ Calico's Present ]

Calico is greatful to the Lord Harmodius for the Second Chance. She is pleased that the chosen as well fits her so well, despite some issues. And she is worried greatly for her lord, as she was loyal in her own ways to him. She admired his strength, his ability in the past, and now is saddened at how far stretched he is. She wishes to aid him, to strengthen him, and to help others sing his praises. She is eager to be once more, yet knows that time is what is most important, and pushing too hard could lead to disaster.

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"Last ngiht I held Alladin's lamp
So I wished that I could stay
Before the thing could answer me
Well someone went and too the lamp away..."
-Magic Carpet Ride, Steppenwolf


"A place to stay, that's fun and whimsical, and certainly comfortable!"

Currently not quite anywhere to call home.

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"Maybe its not to late
To learn how to love
And forget how to hate..."
-Crazy Train, Ozzy Ozbourne


"It's not all psychobabble."

For when I need to clarify something.

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"I saw a lion
He was standing alone
With a tadpole in a jar..."
-Dancing Days, Led Zeppelin


"I think I can remember, maybe."

Oct. 24th :: Mintaka arrives in Gaia, lost and confused.
Oct. 30th :: An odd note is found, listing locations, including the Edelsteine shop, on a map.
Nov. 04th :: Mintaka is attacked by Shivran, injected with something which affects her mind terribly despite Sandrien's best efforts. She flees him and Samsara in fear for ehr own existence and terrified of the possible truth.
Nov. 05th :: After much running, in a focused, yet blind panic, Mintaka arrives at the Edelsteine shop finally and is soothed by Memi, has pancakes, emets a few people and crosses paths with Khiviance. That night while asleep she dreamers herself into the Dream Realm, and meets Mintaka Khariel, and has her memories broght to the surface. This does not entirely help, leaving her with a sense of loss as she knows she is 'incomplete' ...
Nov 06th :: In the dark morning hours after waking from meeting her Otherself, she converses with Calico, adn is allowed to aquire the stone with Harmius' will. They are joined, and Mintaka takes leave of the shop into the Gardens with ehr newfound "bliss" and "completeness" ...
Nov 07th :: Meets Zero, get a small cooking lesson.
Nov 11th :: Calico and Mintaka discover a bit more about one another, such as their feelings on certain ethics.
Nov 12th :: Mintaka sees soemthing that looks an awful lot like johnathan but somewhat see-through. This confuses her greatly.
Nov 13/14th :: Calico and Khiv meet, and Calico decides retreat is the better option as Khiv gets angry. Calico/Min leave in a truly blind panic, out into the streets of Barton.
Nov 14th :: Mintaka awakens in a tree in a park in Barton, and sees that 'Johnathan-like' thing again. Before she can query much further a police officer appears, and during an argument about leaving the tree, Min falls and knocks herself unconscious. She is taken in, and Calico [and her other two selves] try to explain things, but only land them in some serious straightjacket blindings in an insane Asylum. She eventually wakes, finds out, drams herself half-way to Dream to talk to her Otherself. She is left there for the moment, and 'hears' some of the other inmates there and how they are...
Nov 15th :: Mintaka Khariel comes and gets Min out, with a slight lie to prove the existence of gods and a few other tricks to ensure that she gets Min/Calico out. They have doughnuts and drinks and discuss things, such as the nature of what happened, more for Calico's benefit. Mintaka Khariel is aware her other half is sliding slowly into madness.
Nov 16th :: Min & Calico meet Trevani who felt a pul to the shop and show her hospitality as she was shown on her arrival.
Nov 17th :: Mintaka and Memi talk about things and Artistogeiton comes up. Calico sketchs an art of him while Min's not fully paying attention, then gives it to Memi to keep. They go in for cookies and milk, and are interrupted as Khiv & Lucius come out with a stabbed Harmodius. All hell breaks loose as they all fight, and Oblivia scores a hit on lucius' wing in defense of their lord. Calico is hurt and confused by Khiviance's involvement, and much injury is sustained from gravitational pulls.
Nov 18th :: Calico/Min awaken to begin cleaning up around the place after a short chat with Panacea. After a long while, she sees Memi again with Khiv and Lucius, and meets Danielle. With Danielle's aid, stuff is gotten to fix up the place.
Nov 23rd :: Mintaka has a fit of suicidal tendencies, and is forcibly halted and to sleep by Calico and the other two. In her 'slumber' she discusses at length things with her 'shadow' Johnathan. one fo the rare moments Calico hides thigns form Min, the Trio discuss what had happened, and work to resolve their power surge out of Mintaka they had meant for Lucius.
Nov 27th :: Reflectionary of Mintaka and calico, and Calico's first bout of nightmares while sleeping. Calico is still tweaking some things in ehr host related to the madness lurking in there to aid her.
Dec 01st :: Mintaka & Calico vising Mintaka Khariel for some tea and just to talk awhile. She also tells her Otherself she ahd talked to Johnathan, but not the details. This visit is a part of her promise to him.
Dec 04th :: Min runs into Triveni again, relieved she is alright from the incidents, and they talk, first about a skylight where the roof hole is, then about the deal of rebirthing gods and the host's fate, then back to the skylight and plants in the main room.
Dec 05th :: Mintaka visits her Otherself again, and while chatting the dream eggs hatch. Calico bonds to a Daydream as intended and a nightmare which is a twin of Mintaka Khariel's dream. This is aids her reasons to come visit more, and keep her word to Johnathan.
Dec 05th :: Later that day Min and Khiv are sititng in the main room when Trivii arrives back from the store. Chatter ensures,including talk of haircuts, the skylight and plants, a little about love, and also margaritas and tea are to be had. Min gives Trivii a balnket before falling asleep in front of the fire.

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"And a new day will dawn
For those who stand lost
And the forest will echo with laughter..."
-Stairway to Heaven, Led Zeppelin


"Madness is sense, if you know how to decypher it."

.o[ Types of Posts ]
Journal :: An entry written by Mintaka/Calico.
RP :: An "as it happens" entry. Can be solo, or a posting of a joint from somehwere.

Unspeicified posts are consider RP - particularly joint RPs played out in thread.

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.o[ Color Key ]

Mintaka [host] :: black
Mintaka Khariel :: steelblue
Calico :: green (Though sometimes black in early entries)
Lunara/Cheshire :: purple
Oblivia :: orange

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"I've got pretty paper shoes
And I'm weaving you a basket for christmas..."
-Just Fell In, Styx


"Excuse me while I break the fourth wall here."

Note: To whom it may concern - this goddess is not meant to slight or otherwise belittle the diseases of the mind - in truth I myself suffer depression and mood swings of my own and am being treated for that. So trust me, I do understand the plights and sufferings well - and have seen others. She is meant as an exploration into things, a character. I have a very healthy respect for the power fo psychological diseases, and even so much as wish that some thigns would screen more closely for matters, as many people tend to brush them aside as though they were nothing, while people suffer on in silence. So please, do not attack me for what she is, or things I do. I am well aware, and would wish the world would open it's eyes more to the sufferings of others.

[[And no, no one has, but I realzied perhaps I should say something before it happens. trust me, having been removed from the Navy partly for thigns I could not go normally and handle medically ... and only recently taken the steps to better myself, before I did something stupid... well, short of yelling at my dad and basically slamming my hand down during a talk. So yes... I understand well.]]

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The concepts behind Calico kind fo floated around in my head and solidify soemwhat - more like gelatinize, really. Neither solid nor liquid. It's just more amusing with some of the madness breaking out in the Edel's world that she seems all the more appropriate to appear. Guess someone has to manage it all.

If she seems confusing, it is partly what she should be doing - it's a aprt of her nature. Really, writing her is a trick unto itself, especially trying to maintain a similar feel through her. The other personas thign came together along the way, and I kind of shaped it to work. Still needs some refinement, but... yeah.

Music lists are still being refined while I look for that one true song for each and some other fitting ones. xd

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