ok soo...what i'm feeling and ranting about right now!!

[KityKatGirl]

i threw out my cutting items along with old drugs from those days, and i felt sooo free, but now i haven't had the urge to CUT!!! Whats up with that!!! so you think that would be a good thing, right? NO it's not!! Some really shity things have happened since i threw my stuff out and in a normal mindset, cutting would be the first thing i would think to do...but after that sunday (march 10th) i haven't wanted to cut!!! and now i want to just for the sake of doing it (but i have no urges, i just WANT to).
Am i totally crazy?? Would you want to be in my shoes (no urge, just want)?

grrr...idk just ranting
_Sarah_
p.s even though i feel all this, throwing out my stuff was the best thing i've done in a while. And no i didn't do it by myself, i had a very close friend help push me along. And we, i mean I threw the stuff away in a church bathroom (bathrooms are a very happy/life changing place to me, on account of i came to Christ in a bathroom)
Thanks for listening

 

[KityKatGirl]

and i'm not going to cut cause i've gone over a month with out cutting, but i sadly have been trying to trigger myself... sad :/

(sorry dais33 heart )

 

[KityKatGirl]

ok so i'm done cutting for good!!! and for like forever!!! seriously!! i had the greatest feeling come over me on sunday, Easter sunday! and the Lord just showed me that he can heal me, fix me, and rid me of my sins from the inside out!!! (<- amazing song btw) umm...God is just awesome and can helpp you PM me if you want to know more!!  

[xemilyxjaydex]

Congrats on quitting! You still going strong?

I know exactly what you mean about not really having urges, just wanting to. I did and still do the exact same thing. It's very hard to deal with. But all things are possible through Christ. =] That's my favorite, and it's what I use every time I want to cut. It usually pulls me through.  

[KityKatGirl]

yeah i love that one too!! well i cut once since that post but that was like 2-3 weeks ago so we'll see how things go. but the urges have kinda gone away and everytime i do have urges they're less severe. thank you very much for asking