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 Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 9:40 pm
Haha, please don't take your view of America from freakshows like that. I think that most of the people down South over here won't even talk to you, because they don't understand English. Which, in turn, annoys the crap out of me, because if I spend any time up north, French is the second language, but if I spend any time down south, Spanish is the only language!
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Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 9:43 pm
Believe me I don't take my views on America from people like that biggrin And yah... Really here in Canada its East and West. In the East French and English, primarily French are the dominate languages, but in the West, where I live its English, and a mishmash of Asian... Lets see... Korean, Chinese, Japanese, Cantonese, Tomanyese (I'm joking around with that one wink )
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Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 9:51 pm
Well, in Canada, I live in Toronto~~!!
There are a great bunch of Asians here too, and including me! ^ _^
I'm starting school right after labor day.. -sigh- I wish school wouldn't start so soon. But I did have 2 months vacation.. not enough though!
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Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 9:54 pm
I know! School in two days >.< Darn stupid school... >.< and my parents want me to get a job! AGG! I can't take it all!
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Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 10:13 pm
WHAT?!?! In two days! You lucky freakshows!
Yeah, not all of America is overrun by Asians, but my town sure is. I live in the capital of tourism. It's quite funny. We get overrun every Christmas by Asians, mainly Chinese, Japanese, Korean, and Indian. I go downtown all the time to people-watch. Sometimes, we get some tourists from Iowa [no offense meant to anyone from Iowa] who actually dress up in the pink striped shorts, hawaiian shirts, socks, and sandals. White sunscreen noses and over-large cameras included!
Alright, I'm off to bed. Goodnight everyone!
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Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 10:15 pm
Night! *waves* Well I really am not happy about school starting again in 2 days stare But there is nothing I can do about it.... oh well... another school year is about to start >.<
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Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 10:45 pm
SORRY PAGE STRETCH! I just wanted to show you guys something that made me smile. XD
In any case, onward to doing thing. :]]]
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Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 10:47 pm
AHAHAHA!! I needed to see that lol Good old try to trick people noobs >.< *Hopes desperately that they will get to start soon*
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Posted: Sun Sep 02, 2007 11:16 pm
Unintentional Happiness SORRY PAGE STRETCH! I just wanted to show you guys something that made me smile. XD
In any case, onward to doing thing. :]]] OMG!!! whee I'm sorry if 'm not allowed to post here but I got the same exact message! talk2hand Well, I reported it anyway, and await the satisfactory punishment the hacker desserves.
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Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2007 1:36 am
Puff Time for a review, darling.
----
Let's start with the technical things of it. Just to be honest, the image itself is a bit large and yes, it doesn't stretch the page, but it is a bit too large for my tastes. If it would not be too hard, could you resize it a tad few, or rather, I could if you needed to. Just saying, you don't have to, but I'd prefer it. Continuing with the technical parts of what it is that you've done, the dorms, as I stated I'd like them written out as well as the grade. I know, a**l of me to point out it's not written out, but it bothers me a great deal and I'd prefer you to fix that.
Now let's move on to the appearance. The character itself, well let's just say that she fits the appearance of a princess. Beautiful, tall thin, lengthy, long golden hair, blue eyes. Boy doesn't she sound just like a beautiful, beautiful girl? Too beautiful. I know, "Elizabeth" (Talitha's) character is also a beautiful girl, but she does bear flaws unlike what I've read in your character profile. Oh no! How horrible, she's thin and she has small breasts, that's not quite a flaw. Stick skinny isn't something I find a flaw, albeit rather annoying to me, I don't think it's quite a flaw. Based on appearance alone, she sounds like a Mary Sue, but here goes the rest of it.
Her fairytale appearance, as you know, makes perfect sense for her fairytale, which is of course Cinderella, but why does she have to be the "beautiful" version, flawless and amazing; why can't your Cinderella be down in the dumps Cinderella, dirty and cleaning up for the horrid stepsisters and stepmother which she must call family. The outfit sounds divine, but I just thought you should know what I thought.
Her personality, boy oh boy. She's got a need to organize things, above average smarts, a love of being "criticized" (but she isn't afraid to have fun), and a cheery/nice disposition on life for people. She's not afraid of anyone or anything, unless she has feelings for someone, but that mainly means if she like-likes you. Her personality seems to lack. She seems to be based off the mold of what DISNEY had pushed and punched out. She lacks a sort of depth that most normal people have. Accordingly she's nice to anyone or anything and although she does have a slight organization problem, she for the most part reeks of what a Mary-Sue essentially is. A nice person that has a cheery disposition and is blatantly kind to anything no matter how mean or horrid they are. So once again, based on personality alone I must say "Mary-Sue".
Moving onto her Bio.
The date, as you wouldn't have known until this very moment, will need to be back one year. I'm going to set the school year itself in the 2006-2007 school year. So onto the rest of the profile. There's nothing that I find horribly wrong or bothersome about the first two paragraphs, aside from having to read them. Honestly. In the third paragraph we learn a useless fact about her life, that could be made into something interesting that has to do with your character, but no. We just find out she's rich because her daddy is a designer. Honestly. Is it really necessary to make her even MORE fabulous than she already is. In reality, if this were a real person she'd have something new and fantabulous to wear before someone else and she'd probably get major discounts (or if not that she'd have to pay nothing at all) to be the best dressed girl on the block. And she began to like princesses for the dresses, is that because her character was/is already rich like a princess? Whatever.
When she turned twelve she rediscovered her passion and skill for designing/drawing and began to design for herself for her father? So she essentially became a DESIGNER under her father's wing? I honestly dont' see how realistic that is. Also, she lives in a MANSION that goes along with my complaint about her father being a wealthy designer. I mean, he may be, but if that were TRULY so how much time would he really have to devote to her? I'm just saying. She can be rich, but the way you've written it makes her appear so earnestly atrocious to me. The school itself NEVER gives it's full name to outsiders/on it's letter, I realize there is virtually no way for you to know this, but to be honest think about it. They would rather go by E.A. Academy for sending letters to potential students. Just saying. To be honest I don't think your character is really truly suited for Cinderella as she seems far TOO perfect and her life seems far TOO stable. Once again, I just label her a Mary-Sue.
Your character from what was said doesn't seem to be a Cinderella, although her looks are befitting for the DISNEY version of the princess, there are so many stories that would probably be BETTER suited for a girl in such a great place. I highly doubt that they would merely allow her the position of Cinderella just because of a love of princesses (I know, it's a bit of a hypocritical response coming from my own character and her personal love of Pirates).
In any case at this time I will not accept your character into the roleplay as she seems far to Mary-Sue. I don't have any suggestions on what you should do to get into the roleplay other than rewriting the whole thing.
Edit::
Also CHECK the rules once again. :/ Don't just write your profile based off of what you have SEEN in other people's profiles actually bother to CHECK what is clearly written in the rules. >[
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Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2007 8:39 am
Obviously. I am wayy too tired to even start writing the whole thing again. So I won't even bother writing the new one. I know this may sound really rude but I just can't do it. I'm not a pro RP-er so I may not understand what you always want. In any case, I give up. I'm sorry. I can't think up another version so like I said, I give up.
I'm not saying this because you're very 'a**l', it's just that I just woke up here, not thinking and too tired to even write that thing again.
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Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2007 8:46 am
One more little thing. If you ever make the RP, please do put me in the black list. I think you might need to do that since I am such an effortless person in your way of thinking.
^ -^ Thank you very much.
Bye Bye.
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Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2007 10:06 am
crying I agree with what you said Happyness... But I'm still sad that we can't start yet stare Ahh well... *Sits down with a bag of chips and waits for another signup*
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Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2007 11:40 am
Puff Did I ever say you didn't put any effort into your profile? Did I ever state you were an effortless person? I don't believe I did. I believe I may have implied that you were a bit lazy on the part of the rules, but I didn't say that you didn't put forth any effort. Please don't make such an ignorant comment. Just because I didn't accept you into the roleplay does not mean you would go onto the blacklist for being such an "effortless person". That is just "retarded", if I daresay.
Sauron - Happiness*. Sorry, that bothered me to the utmost degree. o_____o;
Haha, we wait. Woo.
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Posted: Mon Sep 03, 2007 12:44 pm
"Yes! Yes! I love you all! Yes!"
*BAM*
"I'mma lady."
*GASP*
*SMOOCH*
"Now we're BROTHER-LADIES!"
And I think, UH, that I might gank your thread set-up philosophy for my own RP, especially because I think it makes the application process a lot more manageable. Now, if I could just decide between the two ideas I've got for it...
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