Okay, so, this is going to be my coming out story. It might be long, because I'm going to tell it in as full a version as possible (I'll do it by chapters, in a way, so you know where you are at the time.
It all began when I was 13 years old...
Chapter 1: Realization
I was in my...I want to say the end of my 7th grade year of elementary school. It was at this time that I started to realize that I was different. Boys on the playground were looking more attractive than I'd thought they were before. This was also the time that I fantasized more about the guys in my class than the girls (but, let's face it, I never much fantasized about them anyway).
This came at an odd time for me...I was growing stronger in my faith, and, with that came the thought that anything not heterosexual was wrong and that I'd go to hell. This, obviously, caused some controversy within myself. On one hand, the boys were hot. On the other, if I thought they were hot, I was gonna burn. This caused me to split in half, in a way, which will be revisited later.
As my knowledge of being different increased, I realized "Hmm...I might be bisexual...I'm at least bisexual..." and so I went with that, in secret, for years. During the time that I hid everything from everyone, I was stressed out like crazy. I had to hide my phone or lock it so my family wouldn't see dirty pics or text messages (yus, I'm a bad boy at times).
It was difficult, and there were many times that I thought suicide would be a better way to handle things. But, I could never bring myself to do it. I valued my life too much for that, no matter how bad it seemed at the time. So, I came out to people on-line, using things like Rabble and Upoc to build my gay and bisexual friend base. They were a source of empowerment for me while I was struggling.
Fast-forward to when I was 16, and the story picks up more...
Chapter 2: The Butterfly Emerges
At 16, I started attending a different church, away from my grandma, so that I had more freedom and could extend my social network. This also gave me a chance to emerge from my cocoon, so to speak. I met my first boyfriend at this church, he was also bisexual. I asked him out a few weeks after we met, and he happily said yes.
My church was a haven for bisexuals, and I'm not joking. There were four of them, including me, and I'd never known that many to be together in one place before, outside of Pride parades. But, therein was the problem. People started to find out...eventually, there were issues with my first boyfriend and I being together.
Though, he fixed that by cheating on me. I stupidly took him back a week later, and then he cheated on me again. That was the last straw, it was over. I ended it, and it stayed that way. From that point until now, I've never had what I would consider to be a real relationship. By that, I mean that I've never dated someone who I could actually be in physical contact with since I broke up with him.
Between 13 and 16, I stayed in the closet. At 16, however, I slowly began to come out, followed by a time where I went back into the closet for fear of my safety (my high school...major homophobes...). Soon after, though, I stopped caring and didn't tell anyone unless they directly confronted me about it in a non-violent way.
Things continued, me out of a relationship and partly in/partly out of the closet until I was 18...
Chapter 3: I'm Coming Out!
When I was 18, I got into Gaia. It happened when I came to college. I'd always wanted one, but I couldn't because we didn't have internet. So, when I got to campus the first thing I did was create an account.
I have never been happier in my life than when I joined Gaia and started meeting all of the amazing people I know now. I also started coming out on Gaia more, and joined some guilds for gay guys, bisexual people, and, now, furries.
This allowed me to be myself, but I still wasn't happy. I had a few Gaia boyfriends, and I went out on a few dates in real life, and it really brought me out of the closet. I came out on campus, and that was the end of it.
Nobody seemed to be bothered by it. When I was 19, I joined the Sexual Orientation Diversity Association, a club for GLBT people on my campus. There, I met some amazing people, we're friends to this day (not that I am THAT much older than when this happened, I'm only newly 20!).
Soon after, I started to gain much of the confidence that I though I'd lost. I became much more comfortable with who I was, and that led to my coming out.
On September 18th, 2010, I came out to my dad. I didn't plan to do it that way, but things just happened. We were at the park, just him, me, and our doggy (doing things at the house, had to leave for a while).
We were sitting and talking...and I just froze. I was like "Dad...can I talk to you?" He said yes, and I asked him if it was true that mom and he would love us no matter what. He said yes to that, too.
I started to cry, like...bawling. He was worried that I was so upset about it, so I told him. "Dad, I'm bisexual." He said that God still loved me (little did he know that I'd lost most of my belief a while back) and that he loved me, too. We talked about it a bit, and he told me he'd be there when I came out to mom if I needed him.
I was also going back to college the next day. We got to my dorm, and mom and I were talking. I told her, outright. "I'm bisexual." She told me she had known for a few years. They both still love me, and fully support me. Now, I'm 20 and living my life the way I want to live it, the way I was meant to live it.
The End
I hope you stuck with me to the end, I know it was long, but it was well worth it, I'm sure, if you were curious about me at all. I wanna say, I was scared to come out. I'd heard so many horror stories that I thought my parents were going to kill me, kick me out, or pull my college funding. Luckily I've got some of the coolest parents I know, and they are totally chill with it. I
'm one of the lucky ones, and I hope that, through this, you can gain something valuable and possibly get some courage. Thanks for reading :3
