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Oh, christ, where do I even start? Boris, the hotshot Japanese rock monsters and Merzbow, Japan's underground God and super-big Boris fan, have been collaborating numerous times over the years and have a total of five releases together. Strangely, Boris didn't release anything in 2001 but rather just holed up and did live shows and recorded with the MErz.

In this article, I plan on reviewing all five, leading into the big review of their newest, ROCK DREAM. But first, I gotta plow through the other four, which is going to be a nightmare...

So, without due, a tribute to a collaboration that well, brings on the noize.

Megatone (2002, recorded in 2001 I guess.)

The first thing released was a truly unfathomable album of pure, vocal-free minimalism and ear-piercing white noise. This isn't anything new for Merzbow (And usually, Merz makes it work really well(Okay, as well as ******** computerized noise is going to be.).) but the problem here is Boris gave this album a droning art which makes it really, really, really a chore to listen through. Look at the song titles and lengths.

1.It Continues Waiting For A Headronefish - 23:26
2.Encounter With The Inside Of The Wave Motion Of Great Waterfuzz - 20:04
3....And Texas Spaceship - 17:56

The song titles resemble a bad take on your average Keiji Haino song. And that's saying...well, not a lot, but something typical of a collaboration like this.

The first two tracks blend together, making the third track seemingly pointless. The music as a whole is just one or two things going on at a time with the occasional noise and chaos, but without any sense of real build-up, impact, or power. Makes you wonder if the other members are asleep or God knows what. There's no drums either so what the ******** could Atsuo possibly be doing on this album!? Either way, none of it's memorable to casual or even avant-garde listeners. So first one's a whammy, what next?

04092001 (2005, recorded 2001.)

A live album, shockingly even worse than the last release! (And ironically, THE most criticized of all the Boris albums.) This album shouldn't be so bad, as it's five heavy rocks songs in two 15-minute tracks, but it's terrible. One thing about Merzbow is that his noise composition is pure improv of the most unpredictable order, and it shows here.

The prime example here is Death Valley (Which he guested on) which is now deprived of rhythm, especially during the middle part of it. The mixing for this live album is nothing short of pitiful and sounds like a live bootleg on vinyl. Notably, everything drowns out the vocals and Merzbow kinda screeches over everything on this.

Lastly, It's also super-limited and definitely for die-hards (rich morons) only.

Sun Baked Snow Cave (2005, recorded from 2001-2004.)

Definitely a change of scene here, this album is one 62-minute song. 15 minutes of straight acoustics which goes into electronic noise and what appears to be the sounds of chilly winds, which alternates for quite a while but drags like a lonely, under-clothed man in the coldest tundra waiting for a bus...from a cave.

It may sound painful, but shockingly this is in the right direction, and more full and lifelike than Megatone. It's a farily long listen, but a more interesting one, and Merzbow isn't trying to damage any eardrums on this one. Definitely something for the patient and cold at heart (and artsy).

Walrus/Groon (2007, recorded 2001.)

Wow. They went from 20+-minute avant-garde musical sloths to covering the Beatles and a short Merzbow song!? Holy s**t, sign me up! Released on a 12" vinyl because they wanted to tribute Yes with a frog(though, realistically, 10" would have been fine considering the length.), it's one of the more interesting and unexpected releases from either band.

I Am the Walrus is a cover of the Beatles classic, and ironically, Takeshi sings it in some bad Engrish. For a band that sings stricly in Japanese, it is funny to see something so sudden in the vocals, which kinda warp and wobble the lyricism to it's own accord. I never knew that he was singing "I am the eggman, they're the eggmen, I'm the Walrus". I thought he was saying "I'm so dead now...soooooo dead now...I'm DUH WALRUS!". The song progresses through just fine with the Bow's noize coming in and out, though sounding admittedly restrained. As the song goes, something even more awkward happens. The girl guitarist sings the most robotic performance ever for one short verse! This is also funny becuase it soudns like she's slowly rapping the vocals the way she's singing them.

It's no wonder she didn't attempt singing until Rainbow. Anyways, the song finished up and Merzbow kinda explodes into a mass of low-end bass and noise, like he couldn't hold it anymore. If this was equivalent to a bomb going off, imagine a bunch of birds sitting on dynamite (literally).

Groon is a cover or Merzbow's "Vanilla Groon" with Boris instruments and while sounding extremely raw and droning, is frickin' awesome.

Rock Dream (2007, recorded 2006.)

And now we've come to this, a 2CD live show of Boris With Merzbow Oneman at the Earthdom festival in Tokyo. I'm shocked that this album is as good as the packaging, which is designed like a 2LP with the two cd "sleeves" depicting the four members in this stark gold-ish light. Very professional and classy looking, and one of the best packaged boris releases at the best ******** price for a well-packaged Boris release.

This first disc begins with the classic "Feedbacker", 35 minutes in length and like a long trippy ride through space. I don't care much for this song, live or studio, but that's just me. After this is a crushing take on the song "blackout" which leads into 4 minutes of messy, painful improv entitled "EVIL STACK". Evil Stack, indeed. Following this altercation of strange psychadelia is "Rainbow", done faster with Wata's entrancing vocals and better soloing. Four songs over one hour. If this was the whole show, then yes this would have sucked, but thankfully, the second disc more than makes up for the first disc's random selection.

The second disc captures Boris live at it's finest. One thing to note is the crowd is usually as stoic as the band is live (Also to note you can't really hear the crowd at all on any of their live releases!) but the drummer goes nutzo screaming "YEAH!", "COME ON!", "WOO!", and "AAAAAGH!" a lot during songs. He and Mr. Bow are mixed super-high here, to pump up the madness like a wrassler on steroids.

The second disc begins with the Motorhead-ish "Pink", and the band goes into hyper-drive, playing fast and shredding like wild animals. The band just seems to speed faster and faster like they've bathed in petrol and they just lit up on the second disc. I know some people like to criticize Boris for some of their songs and live performances, but taking away how good these song come out in live fashion may just be sacrilege. One example is Ibitsu, which is absolutely jaw-dropping to listenn to. After that burst of maniacal speed, they slow back down with the sludgy, poppy "A Bao A Qu", the drone mammoth "The Evilone Which Sobs", and a new track called "Sun, Flower, Rain".

But then, they shoot back even harder and louder with "Just Abandoned My-Self, which is worth the admission alone. This 14-minute masterpiece is truly the perfect set-ender for any band but it's Boris' meisterwork and no one's elses.

Then they slow back down with Farewell. All-in-all it's a shockingly too good two hours of music and surprisingly, Merzbow plays the background player, not trying to overlap too hard, but rather add to the music. Strangely, it's hard to believe he's on his custom noise computer becuase most of his s**t on this sounds like a synthesizer. Very awkward, but who cares? I spent 15 bux on a live album that managed to rock my socks!

And that's Boris With Merzbow. Five releases, five reviews. Don't blow your eardrums (Or your wallets.)