1. "Stupidity got us into this mess, stupidity can get us out of it!"
2. “Support bacteria. They’re the only culture some people have.” – Unknown.
3. “The shortest distance between two points is under construction.” – Noelie Altito.
4. “Wit is cultured insolence.” – Aristotle.
5. “Suppose you’re in a hypothetical situation…” – Steve Wechsler.
6. “Illiterate? Write for help!” – Anonymous.
7. “It’s a control freak thing. I wouldn’t let you understand.” – S.H. Underwood.
8. “Analyzing humor is like dissecting a frog. Few people are interested and the frog dies of it.” – E.B. White.
(I got these from a another website)
1. “Home sweet home is far from this dump.”
2. “Some days I wake up grumpy. Other times I let him sleep.”
3. “Friends are there to hear the song in my heart and clue me into it when my memory fails.”
4. “When I get the urge to clean, I lay down until it passes.”
5. "A university professor set an examination question in which he asked the difference between ignorance and apathy. The professor had to give an A+ to a student who answered: 'I don't know and I don't care.'" - Richard Pratt
6. "I have PMS and a gun. EXCUSE ME. You were saying?"
7. "I can go from chick to b***h in 3.5 seconds!"
8. "If all the world's a stage, then men need better roles."
9. "It's been lovely, but I have to SCREAM now."
10. "To love another person is to see the face of God." - Les Miserables, disc 2 on the CD
11. "No overexerting yourself. This means keeping the things you do at a bare minimum. Oh, don’t whine—yes, you can still do the laundry! Gods, but you’re obsessive." - Rule Three in 'A Stork For Sessha,'
12. "God did not create men and women equal...don't worry; give him time, and he'll evolve."
13. "I'm not as think as you drunk I am!"
14. "But Ocifer, I swear to drunk I'm not God!"
15. "Warning: Trespassers will be shot
Warning: Survivors will be shot again."
16. "I feel that there is an angel inside me whom I am constantly shocking!"
17. "All bow your heads for the man's prayer:
I'm a man, but I can change
If I have to.
I guess." - Red Green show, weekly, PBS
18. "It's as BAD as you think, and they ARE out to get you."
19. "It's tourist season, so why can't I shoot them?"
20. "Suicide is a way of telling God: 'You can't fire me, I QUIT!'"
21. "This calls for a particularly subtle blend of psychology and extreme violence."
22. "You say you dislike me, but deep down, you know you hate me."
23. "Sarcasm is just one more service I offer."
24. "'Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit' as said by those incapable of its proper application and as such suffer from it a lot."
25. "Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly."
26. "My goal in life is to hurt you, severely. Come here..."
27. "That which doesn't kill you...will probably try again."
28. "I'm not tense. I'm just terribly, terribly alert."
29. "I hear voices, and they don't like you."
30. "If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried."
31. "If at first you do succeed, try not to look too astonished."
32. "This is not something to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown, with great force."
33. "He's not dead; he's electroencephalographically challenged."
34. "For sale: Parachute. Only used once, never opened, small stain."
35. "Always remember you're unique...just like everyone else."
36. "A day without sunshine is like, you know, night."
37. "If you don't like my driving then stay off the sidewalk!"
38. "My imaginary friend thinks you have serious mental problems."
39. "I like work. It fascinates me. I could sit and look at it forever."
40. "How little do they see what is, who frame hasty judgments upon that which seems."
41. "The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense."
42. "They say love hides behind every corner. I must be walking in circles!"
43. "Nobody makes a greater mistake than he who does nothing because he can only do little."
44. "Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die."
Silverpup Community Member 
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