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English Paper
Ok so this is an odd idea for an assignment, why even do this? Well if this is about what we thing, this is gonna be scary. So if you were to have a way to complete a job, do it, even if it means running into a car for the hell of it. When you jump off a car, angle yourself away from the car, stick your feet on the ground, and roll over your shoulder. Do not smash your head into a wall just because it is there, smash it through the wall and go to the ER several hours later, bonus points for if it was on accident. When you see dirtex, don't drink it, just forget that your hands are covered in it and eat some chips, then feel the worst pain imaginable. When you are stuck in a blizzard, don't fall asleep. When you run across wood without shoes and socks, slide so you have to sit down for 5 hours taking out splinters. When you have a splinter, take out most of it and leave a tiny tiny piece of it in your finger, so that it'll get infected, and you have to cut open your finger while on a bumpy road, with a safety pin. When batting, don't drop the bat in front of you and run into it, you don't want to lose a nut or two. When punching metal, don't do it. When eating Wasabi, don't stick the whole god damn batch on your tongue. When running, don't trip into a pole, flip over and hit your head. When you are in a shower, don't slip, grab a bar, that bar comes losose and hits you, and then get up and trip over the bar, and land on your face on the floor. When petting a dog, don't let it bite through your lip. When on a trampoline, don't jump near the edge, get your leg caught, and dangle off the side till you find a way off. When caring wood, don't drop it on both feet. When running, yet again, don't smash into a door knob. When playing Rugby, don't die by breaking your neck. When you're in a croucthed position, don't stay like that for 15 minutes. When you have a sledge hammer, don't hit your arm with it. When your friend has a bamboo leave, don't let him whip your arm with it. When your in a small room, don't bounce off the walls.
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