Oh... silly me, now I'm getting sidetracked. I want to tell you my story. I need to tell my story before He (being his shadowy form. I figure He and Him make the figure more mysterious and scary as well as real) makes me go completly and totally mad.
I was a young child when my parents died and I was sent to an orphanage. It wasn't long after that I was sent to a lab for testing. The lady who sent me to the orphanage had walked into the room one night. She caught me putting my gift -though being where I am now, I consider it more of a curse- to good use. I was making some drawings that I had done dance around the page.
"Azoth! What are you doing?" she had exclaimed, making both me, and for a brief second my drawings jump.
"N-nothing!" I had replied quickly, though I knew she had seen everything.
"I knew there was something about you since the day you arrived."
I stayed silent, even when she grabbed my arm and pulled me downstairs behind her. Thankfully no one else was up, but I still had tears of humiliation and pain in my eyes. I remember just how painful her vice-like grip was on my arm.
"Gonna turn you in. Get some money!" She said that to herself, but looked at me over her shoulder as she said it.
"Turn me in where?" I asked,petrified now.
"Why, to them bloody scientists o' course," she cackled and I started struggling. I knew what they did there. But she kept her vice-like grip on me and dialed a number on the phone with her free hand. Despite how close I was to her, I couldn't make out a word she was saying.
"Please don't do this," I begged when she had hung up. But she stayed silent, forcing me to sit on the couch. I know I could have, should have run, but as I said earlier, I was much to scared.
What seemed like ages, though it couldn't have been more than thirty minutes, there was a sharp knock on the door.
"Come in!" the prphanage lady called out in a sing song voice. I don't think she wanted me out of her sight for a minute, lest I should decide to run.
"Where is the boy," a gruff male voice called back after the door banged open.
"Here," she replied, rising to her feet.
~~~~~~~~~
Now, taking a small break from that, there is something I must describe to you. I have another being. I call that being simply "Him" because otherwise he'd have the same name as me, since he is me. Only a dark, guilt-ridden form of me. Even as I sit here writing this, he's pulling me closer and closer to the realms of insanity and madness. That's also another reason for my lost sense of time. And now, I continue with my tale of my descent into madness and despair.
~~~~~~~~~
They put something over my mouth and nose -cholorform I think_ and i passed out. When I awoke, I was strapped to a table. I tried to scream, but they had my mouth taped shut as well.
"He's awake!" I heard a female voice called out, then I heard the pounding footsteps rushing this way.
I struggled up against the straps to no avail.
"Now we can start the testing," a gruff male voice said sharply. The same voice from the orphange.
"No!" I tried screaming, but only managed a muffled whisper into my tape gag. Then there was a sharp p***k in my arm and I passed out again. More drugs. Damn it...
The next time I woke up, there were wires taped to my skull and whirring machines around my bed that I was strapped to now.
"Where am I?" I asked. It took me a second to realize that I had spoken out loud, but when I realized that I began to scream.
"Will someone shut that kid up?" yelled a man, and there was a small strip of cloth tied around my mouth almost before the man had even stopped speaking.
"Hello Azoth," said a gruff voice.
"It's you..." I tried to say but was unable to because of the gag. It was once more the guy who tried snatching me from the orphanage, and he looked the same as he sounded.
He nodded at a couple of people and the wires were pulled from my head, as well as the gag.
"Now tell me how you aquired your gift."
"I don't know," I replied softly, looking right into the man's oddly colored silver eyes.
"Do not lie to me..." he growled and there was a white hot flash of pain on my arm.
"I'm not!" I gasped, trying not to cry out in pain. But there was another blinding pain in my arm making me whimper.
The man laughed. "Are you ready to tell the truth now?"
"I-I am," I cried, the tears running down my face. The pain increased, making me cry out my parent's names, but the only thing I heard was more lasughter.
"How did you get your gift?"
"I was born with it..." I whimpered, tensing as I already knew what was coming.
The pain came, increased ecven more. This time I blacked out, crying pitifully.
When I came to, I was surrounded by people again. I groaned softly and they looked at me.
"He's awake," a female voice called out.
The scientist came back and looked down at me.
"Ready yo speak yet?"
I shook my head, staying silent.
"So be it... let the tests begin." He barked some orders and there were more pin pricks and flashes of pain, as well as more wires taped to my head.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Now... taking another break... He is becoming stronger and I weaker. Even as I am speaking to you now, I'm slipping away. Soon I'll be in nothing but blackness, listening to my own voice while my dark counterpart emerges, becoming the new me. Maybe He's better suited to tell this story anyway, but I want to get it all out before I disappear. I know I don't have much time now, so I must hurry.
~~~~~~~~~~~
They started painful tests. I had blood drawn, pieces of my brain taken out and all in the name of figuring out how I had aquired a gift I was born with. This went on for years. Five if memory serves me correctly.... and all in a glass room. Well, me and the gruff scientist anyway... he was asking me all these questions so I snapped. I lunged for the him but he held me back with one hand. (now all messed up and almost not making sense in the context and order it's written in. All part of the slowly maddening brain)
~~~~~~~~~~~
Heh... looking back on that, I think that's where I first found Him. He'd been there since my parent's death, but He was especially strong that night. But the doctor/scientist was stronger.
~~~~~~~~~~~
"Just tell me where you got your gift!" he roared, glaring at me.
"Fine! I stole it! Are you happy now?" I sank to the floor, crying silently.
"Who?"
"I killed him..." I lied, just wanting to be out of this nightmare.
"Fine... hget out of here kid..."
Before I realized what had happened, I was thrown into the street and unsure why. I didn't even know what to do and that scared me.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Still to this day I don't know why the scientist threw me out, but I was and am glad to be rid of those tests. I may not be in a better place now, but it is less pai-
Hello... this is Him. Azoth can not finish his story now, so I'm here to say good-bye for him. But his body is mine now. Don't worry. He's safe, but he's not here. If you really want him, let's go to the deepest pits of insanity and madness. You'll find him there.
Buh-bye now.
