**isghs** an i'm reading this book and it's so sad. i cried like 3 times and i'm not even done with it. it just reminds me so much of so many things. and for some strange reason when i read it i think of my b/f **sighs**. and really right now when i'm thinking about him i feel sad because of what happened. don't want to really say so yeah. well one thing it reminds me i of the love i have for my b/f. one line in it doesn't seem like true love but yet it does, "i want us to live...eat,meals,study...share or troubles...like we did before...together. i want to stay together." and when i read that line i cried. i thought it was so beautiful. the characters might be friends i think but it just reminds me of my love. and then there's this song i find so beautiful and so true towards me. heard of the band shinedown? well their song burning bright is so beautiful. one line is "the more the light shines threw i pretend to close my eyes. the more the dark consumes me i pretend i burn bright." when it's so happy i think sometimes it'lla ll go away. but yet when it's sad i try and make it happy again. and another line "there's nothing ever wrong, but nothing is ever right." i think i shouldn't ever think that what i think is right is right because soemtimes it's wrong. is it right to doubt him? no it's not. is it ok to doubt her? no it's not. is it ok to love them both? yes it is. should i do soemthing that makes them happy when 'm sad about it? i don't know...i wonder that sometimes, but yet i love them so much i just dont' want to lose them...my mom always says nobody is worth hurting yourself. i use to think that but if i had to hurt myself to save one of those two or both of them i would. hell i would die for them. they mean so much to me and to lose them i would lose everything. my happiness, my love, and maybe my life. i say maybe on life because well sometimes i just can't do the job or i'll just not want to make my family and friends to be sad. but yet i see if i do lose them i lose them and if they want to be away form me to make them happy, i'll let them be happy.
xThe Obscurex · Wed Dec 29, 2004 @ 05:28am · 2 Comments |