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Article for -Marriage is Like a Cult-
The Cult of Marriage
So, when are you getting married?
By Cholntz E. McGee
Getting married in the era of pop culture has become the ultimate fad, revolving around the envy of the biggest diamond, the lust of the wildest bachelor/ette party, the pride of who had the most wedding guests, the gluttony of the cocktail hour, and the greed of getting every gift on that sacred registry.
But beyond the sins of the super-sized wedding and after the 40-piece symphony plays "Here Comes the Bride," things go back to normal, right?
In most instances, yes, the couple comes back down to earth after their wedding and honeymoon high and the two proceed to live out the rest of their lives in relative normalcy.
But lurking inside every couple is that seed that was planted -- perhaps by some previously married couple -- to convert every non-married couple they know into newlyweds.
It's the cult of marriage, and many have or will fall victim to it.
The amazing thing about the cult of marriage is, there is no one individual leading the cult like, say, Susan Powter or David Koresh. Rather, it is a force greater than any one person, like South Park's Wall-Mart.
But instead of slap-happy customers spreading cheer about rollback prices on toilet paper, couples spread the happiness of marriage through a simple plea: "When are you two gonna tie the knot?"
The question has no real answer, and yet it's the way unhitched couples attempt to respond to it that keeps the cult alive.
Asked by married friends, the question puts both members of the non-married couple on the spot -- a cutesy look between them, a prayer by one to not hear the word diamond, and then a non-answer. But the question bores through the couple for the rest of the evening, as concerns about wedding costs and raising an interfaith child and what flavor cake to pick race through both their heads. The seed is planted.
Asked by married family members, it inevitably and stereotypically becomes a question of the man's worth and values. If the couple goes on the defensive, the family members persist with magical tales of marriage. If the woman in the relationship sides with the family members, the pressure is on five-fold.
So why all the pressure from married folks? Is it because they are truly happy and want the same for the unmarried couple? Is it because they're miserable and want others to share their suffering? Is it because married couples simply feel obligated to convert sinning co-habitators from the dark side?
The funny thing about cults is, there never has to be a good reason, just a common cause.
Marriage should be practiced more or less like religion. Kept to one's self, religion is a powerful set of an individual's beliefs. Preached to the masses, it easily and systematically becomes a cult.
We've all been to a wedding and seen the couple drink from the same cup of wine. That ain't wine. It's Kool-Aid.
Cholntz E. McGee prefers drinking Ecto-Cooler.
 arcanum_kage · Sun Sep 10, 2006 @ 09:33pm · 0 Comments |
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