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- Last Login
- 06/13/2010 3:10 pm
- Total Posts
- 3847
- Posts Per Day
- 0.56
- Member Since
- 12/12/2005
- Location
- Hölle
- Gender
- Male
- Website
- Personal Website
Wish List
About
Age: 21 (and counting)Sexual orientation: Eh...don't particularly care to tell anyone, really. (Seriously, though, why do SO many people put their sexual orientation in their profiles? Like they just HAVE to let the world know if they're gay or not. Nobody effing cares, dammit!)
Employer / Job Position: Pacific Gold Farms, Inc. / Payroll assistant
Hobbies include: Playing bass guitar, composing music/songwriting, drawing, writing (mostly fiction), fencing, and foreign languages (esp. German, Dutch, and Russian), storyboarding for an RPG that'll never get made
I like: Women, reading, sleeping, hanging out with friends, having lightsaber duels with friends (^_^ wink , playing video games, intellectuals, listening to music, generally friendly people, food, creative/artistic individuals, anime (even though I NEVER watch any...), and a narrow variety of movies & TV shows
I dislike: Bitches/nags, grossly ignorant people, people who refuse to see the other side of an argument, people who can't drive worth s**t, atheists with an irrational hatred of religion, people who can't "agree to disagree" when no true answer can be found, people who refuse to acknowledge the classics because they're too stuck on whatever's new...did I mention I don't like people in general? Yeah, people tend to SUCK. I also heavily dislike chatspeak. Is teh sux0rz.
ZOMG LET'S PLAY FAVORITES!!!1lol
What's your favorite...
...color? Fluctuates between green and blue. We'll say teal.
...number? −1
...animal? Cats
...kind of food? Mexican
...genre of music? Thrash metal
...band/musician? Megadeth
...subject in school? Creative writing
...sport to watch? Wrestling (of the WWE variety)
...sport to play? Fencing
...style of drawing? (Realistic, cartoon, etc.) Semi-realistic anime.
...scent? Fresh linen. I know, I'm strange.
...dessert? Plain chocolate shake. I know, I'm bland.
...pizza topping? Bell pepper
...style of dress? Slacks and T-shirts, no particular brand
...kind of car? Ferraris are sexy. VERY sexy.
...movie? The original Star Wars trilogy (I consider it one movie)
...TV show? Red Dwarf
...video game? (If you play video games.) Toss-up between Final Fantasy VI and Majora's Mask
...video game console? Anything by Nintendo
...book? The Belgariad/The Malloreon series The Elenium/The Tamuli series, both by David & Leigh Eddings
...fast food chain? Arby's
...type of drink? Milkaholic, people! We've got a milkaholic, comin' through!
...season? Winter
...weather? Rainy
IT'S A CELEBRATION, BITCHES!
ENJOY YOURSELVES!
THIS GUY IS AWESOME.
FFVI PWNS TEH OTHER FFS!
BECAUSE RUSSIANS KNOW WHAT THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT.
Quotes and inside jokes for your viewing pleasure...or revulsion.
1.
Me: "SAY something, Slippy!"
Slip: "................I have no d**k."
2.
Me: *playing smash bros.* "Ooh, THREE pokéballs! ..... That's like the amount of balls Alex probably has."
Slip: "Wow. That's a lotta semen."
3.
Slip: "Man...women are weird."
Slip's sis: "Yeah, Jared's weird!"
Slip: "I'm glad you made that connection - I do it too!"
4.
Me: *imitating Jared* "I'll get you one day!"
Slip: "That's hilarious, Jared... the only thing you need to get is another testicle!"
5.
Slip: *staring off into space* "Penises...I LOVE 'em."
Me: "....WHAT?"
Slip: "...what?"
Me: "You just said you loved penises!"
Slip: "WHAT!? Wait, I got mixed up! I swear I meant to say 'titties'!"
6.
Slip: "So, I guess we see...that a teenage retard isn't even the equivalent of a seven year old kid."
7.
Me: "If there was ever proof on this planet that even God makes mistakes, it's Alex's family."
Slip: "OH. MY. GAWD. That is the WORST. ONE. YET. That is the most berating, derogatory term I have EVER. HEARD."
Me: "...Did you like it?"
Slip: "It...it was brilliant! High five!"
8.
Jared: *as if finding out about how we make fun of him all the time* "God wouldn't have done this to someone if He existed! Oh, the humiliation! Ohhh......I'm just gonna go read Mein Kampf for the third time..."
9.
Slip's dad: "So what's our excuse get out of going to Chanukah with the family this time?"
Slip: "I could beat up Timmy..."
Slip's dad: "....Well, I'd like to see that, but Mike would get mad at me."
10.
Me: "Aw, dude...! eek Look at the genetics on THAT guy!"
Slip: "Aw, man...heh, I'd feel sorry for that guy if it wasn't so funny!"
Me: "Man, you're better at being mean than you are at nice..."
Slip: "I know, but I laugh more that way!"
11.
Slip: "I know things about that guy that would curl your hair - your pubic hair."
Me: "I think I'm going to die...from laughter. And who'd have thought that Alex would have been the source of it?"
12.
Slip: "And then I'd get my brothers' respect, and that would make me happy. That'd be like...the happiest thing ever..........besides kicking Jared in the nuts for all those times he hit me down there..."
Me: "You mean 'the nut'."
Slip: "Oh yeah, 'the nut', sorry...my mistake."
13.
Brian, creator of 8-bit Theatre: "Hey, I didn't know you guys knew about Jared! I based a character off him once..."
Me: "Red Mage, right? Brian, my man, let me give you more material..."
14.
Slip: "A fitting end to a tragic - yet hilarious - tale. The kind that I like - where one man gets beaten down and the others come out on top.........no, wait, lemme rephrase that; where everyone gets beaten down, and I come out on top. I'm a selfish b*****d!"
Me: "Aren't we all?"
15.
Slip: "Man, Üter from the Simpsons is hilarious...but not 'cause he means to be. He just is."
Me: "Yeah...one episode, these Civil War reenactors were trying to kill him, and Üter couldn't catch up to the bus! He was like 'Hel'p! Hel'p!'"
Slip: "Oh man...I pissed my pants during that episode."
Me: "...Really?"
Slip: "Yeah."
16.
*listening to 'scary' halloween sounds on a CD*
Slip: "Man, this is getting repetitive and boring." *a voice seems to whisper 'have sex!'* "Wait, did it just say 'have sex'!?" *have sex!*
Me&Slip: "BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
17.
Me: "So anyway, the first victim in Saw II had an unlockable killer contraption on his head, but...the key was implanted in his eyeball so he had to either stab out his eye or die."
Slip: "...That'd hurt like a swift kick in the balls, man!"
18.
Me: *imitating a whiny black baby* "I WANT MY GRAPE DRINK NOW!"
Slip: *imitating a hick* "Well you can't have it...****** BABY!"
(No offense to any African Americans reading this. It was just hilarious at the time...please don't hurt me!)
19.
"Show me your vertical smile! =)"
(No, there's no sexual innuendo in that...)
20.
Slip: "This is the weirdest conversation we've ever had...talking about p***s-noses and a**-funnels."
21.
Slip: "Seriously, though, dude. You can't just fall content with your bachelor life. You NEED to find a woman. It's totally worth it."
Me: "Yeah, I know. I won't be satisfied with the way things are now! I'm like a Disney princess: ♫I want MOOOOOOORE!♪"
Slip: "...That is perhaps the greatest analogy I've ever heard in my life."
Current Favorite Song:
Megadeth - Head Crusher
It's time to take your last walk in this world
Before your journey begins underground
But not before we torment you from your
Cell straight to hell with a short detour in-between
Begging for mercy, all alone
Unable to handle the pressure
Before his mortification, now let the torture begin!
Death by the head crusher!
Head Crusher!
Death by the head crusher!
The horrific torture device
For those who fail interrogation
The most painful technique ever known
People thirst for the worst, the skull's disintegration
Beaten, broken, in bloody rags
Adding insult to injury, he recants
But its much too late, now let the torture begin!
Death by the head crusher!
Head Crusher!
Death by the head crusher!
On your knees, prisoner, take your position
Place your chin forward into the restraint
Your head slowly caves in from the compression
You faint in a blackout from the infernal pain
Twisting, turning the giant screw
Your teeth are breaking loose
Crushed and splintering into your mouth
Winding down, cutting through
Like broken glass being chewed
The fragmented skull and shattering bones
There's nothing you can do!
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Whoa, I'm a chick! 0.0
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