Blonde One-Liners
What did the blonde say when she saw the sign in front of the YMCA?
"Look! They spelled MACY's wrong!"

Why did the blond lay out on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight?
She wanted to get a dark tan.

What did the blonde's mother say when she asked if she could lick the bowl?
"Just flush it like everybody else does."

Hear about the blonde explorer?
She bought a piece of sandpaper thinking it was a map of the Sahara Desert.

Did you hear the one about the blonde that had a problem with her bed?
She couldn't find a knife large enough to apply the bed spread.

What is every blonde's ambition in life?
To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

How did the blonde try to kill the bird?
She threw it off of a cliff.

How did the blonde burn her nose?
Bobbing for french fries.

Why do blondes have see-through lunch box tops?
So they can tell if they are going to work or going home, while on the bus.

Why do blondes like lightning?
They think someone is taking their picture.

Why do blondes have little holes all over their faces?
From eating with forks.

What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head?
A space invader.

What do you call a blonde in a tree with a brief case?
Branch manager.

Why did the blonde have tire tread marks on her back?
From crawling across the street when the sign said "don't walk."

Why did the blonde take her typewriter to the doctor?
She thought it was pregnant because it missed a period.

Why did the blonde call the welfare office?
She wanted to know how to cook food stamps.

What do you call four blondes in a Volkswagen?
Far-from-thinkin.

What did the blonde name her pet zebra?
Spot.

Did you hear about the blonde that shot an arrow into the air?
She missed.

What do you give the blonde who has everything?
Penicillin.

Did you hear about the blonde that stayed up all night to see where the sun went?
It finally dawned on her.

Why do blondes ge