About

My Name is Derek. Xedrek Uchiha is my O.C. for Naruto and he represents everything I stand for. I have three favorite character's in Naruto: Madara Uchiha (The Reason for my Appearance.) I love him so much, I feel like he is just misunderstood. I know what he is doing is wrong and I do not agree with it. However, I do understand why he is doing it. I understand that he lost a lot in the early era of Shinobi. He always saw that his Clan that he was responsible to lead was being used and oppressed by those he sought to ally himself with. He knew that oppression was a possibility. But he took a chance because his Clan, his Family, wanted to stop fighting and all he wanted to protect them. I'm so freaking Obsessed with him he is the definition of "Bad a**". Next is Itachi Uchiha. Now Itachi is special to me. Because he was my first favorite growing up... I always felt like there was something more to him than what reports and appearances suggested. I was happy that I got to live long enough to see that I was right about him. He was a kind, gentle and loving boy that hid behind a facade of lies. All he wanted to protect what was most precious to him, and make amends for the part he played in his clans destruction, even though it was for the right reasons. My Third and final is Orochimaru, The only real reason for absolutely falling in love with him is his experimental side and somewhat sexual aspect that a lot of people tend to over look. It just makes him an attractive character. His creepiness is also a huge part that draws me to him. All in all, he is a sexy, experimental bad a**!

Up until now I have lived my life based the lessons I learned and the people I learned them from. I grew up with a very abusive father. That taught me how not treat my future children or my future wife, should I live that long. My Mother taught me what it means to be strong. To love without restraint, and to never judge other people for their Sexual Orientation, Color, Gender or Disability. We are all people and we should love one another and strive to achieve peace and understanding. Though that last part, about not judging people, I learned on my own really, she just emphasized on it. I have never had problems loving people. Honestly I am probably one the sweetest people you will ever meet. It takes a lot to make me angry, though If I do get angry is usually bad and involves a lot of yelling and frustration. I have struggled with a lot of conflicting emotions. I still struggle with depression every day, though it gets worse at night. I used to cut myself but I haven't had those feelings in quite a few years. I went to Therapy 3 different times on account of the depression and cutting throughout Junior high and once in High School. The depression still gets bad sometimes. I lay awake at night and cry and wonder why I keep hurting other people with my inconsistencies, with my problems. I often feel like a burden that people would be better off without. But I know that those people who I feel don't need me, love me very much and would be angry if I ever did anything that would put my life at risk. I have outgrown thoughts of Suicide. But that doesn't mean the feelings and emotions are gone. Sometimes they just come out of nowhere. I don't even know why I have them sometimes. But I have them and I know that I have to fight through the pain and hurt. However, There is this one friend that I met on gaia and we have been friends ever since though we have hit our fair share of rough spots along the way. I just feel like I am keeping him from living his life to the fullest....and truly being happy. I don't want to keep hurting him, so last week on Thursday we didn't have a fight, it was just a small "thing" that basically ended with me crying and telling him I think I should remove myself from the picture and we should go our separate ways. He clearly doesn't want me to, he said he didn't want me to leave him behind, and I don't want to either. But I don't see any other way right now. I just wish I could make things right.... I have decided for the time being to keep our friendship alive..But there is still a part of me that feels like I just don't belong in his life anymore. I know that many things have changed between us and there may come a day when we have to say goodbye. But I know that we will always have a connection. I never forget a friend. Especially one that has made an impact.... I love my friends and I know they love me. I'm just trying not to be another "thing" slowing them down. Even though I know it doesn't always work out that way.

I am a major Otaku and sometimes I get a lot of back lash from friends who aren't into Anime and Manga as much I am, if at all.... So I have learned how to be an Otaku and a "normal" person at the same time.... I am still way more an Otaku than a "Normal". I am currently attending College and i'm stuck on whether I should Major in Magnetic Resonance Imaging (MRI) Medical, Or whether I should study Criminal Justice and pursue a career in that... Any Suggestions would helpful... I know this is more like a blog post than an "about me" section. But I guess I just needed to express myself a little bit more than usual. Any way um my favorite anime are Naruto and Naruto Shippuden, Dragonball and Dragonballz, Blood+, Fairy Tail and Attack On Titan. I am a huge fan of Once Upon A Time, Rumplestiltskin is my favorite....