About

blaugh HELLO everyone!!!
It has been around 5-6 years since the last time I was on here under the name of MiStress no YaMi and melody726is91badass.
Yes, I'm 30 but I still get ID'ed. XD
I have no wrinkles unless I smile and then I get the ( ).

So a lot has happened in that time. But I rather not say too much.
But I will say that I'm happily married for the second time with my second child, a son (born around new years eve 2017) and that we're currently living in Germany due to my husbands work. I'm looking at my second divorce at 30... I'm done getting married.

The first was pretty much a tool and pretty much useless. He was always good at making me feel like I was s**t and didn't deserve him when it was really the other way around. I was too good for him, he thought that girls should be easy to please in the adult way(like in 2-3 mins). But that's enough about that loser. I have a real man now. He makes me happy in more ways then 1. 3nodding heart

He is still a real man and treats me as an equal but there was just a lot that happened that factored into us getting divorced. I do wish he had mentioned his worries before he reached his breaking point and said that marriage counseling couldn't help. But I'm not gonna force him to stay with me. I'd be lying if I didn't say that I was slightly bitter about it. I guess it's slightly petty to not tell him that we'll never be together again, even if he asks me to.

I do not believe in getting back with an ex. They're an ex for a reason (most of the time) and the past will always come back up in one way or another.

In some ways, I've changed; and other, I haven't. Life is very complicated.

But let's just say I've become a lot of things I swore I would never be.

I swore I'd never be a teenage mom (it happened at 19).
I swore I'd never be a teenage wife (it happened at 18 when I pregnant and expecting my first child {a boy})
and more.

But if you're a teen reading this please learn one thing, that I wish I knew or was told but no, no one ever told me.

You do NOT have to get married to the person that you're having a child with. If area you live is that way just remember that YOU are the one that has to deal with the consquiences not the town. You are the one that has to pay for the child. You have to make sure the child is fed. You have to make sure the child has supplies. You are the one keeping the child alive. Not the townfolks.

The town may have a vote of the fetus but not of the child itself. (in most of the usa, at least in the south were I was when I had my first born).

It's better for a child to see their parents get along apart rather than be together and fighting all the time. That just sits them up for failure and what they should expect in a relationship and later realizing that their parents were selfish for thinking that this was best for the child(ren). Such as if the mom was slapped around by the father, the child will think that's normal and that is to be expected. The parents not realizing how harmful that is.

If you are deciding when/why I ended my first marriage it's for many reasons:

1. Got tired of feeling like I'm s**t(even though I was working at Jack-in-the-box at the time) and still having to clean after him (he has uncontrolled seizures but couldn't be bothered to do much with women's work. No, I'm not kidding.)
2. Got tired of feeling like I was Ugly/ having my self esteem lowered and lowered.
3. The final straw being that death was better than staying with him. I was so depressed at that point that I could hardly eat (3-4 bites of food for breakfast and that was it for the day. My weight at the time was around 130lbs; I dropped to 110/115lbs. I was sick often due to being so skinny).
4. Oh forgot to mention that when I suggested that he do something, he'd pretty much ignore it but when I'd ask my dad to tell him the same thing; he'd listen to it. Tried to explain beyond multiply times that he did that but it never clicked in his head. But oh well. His loss (me).

But that was only the beginning of 2015. lol
It got better after that.
One faithful decision lead me to my current husband and the love of my life.
I know that if he ever died, for some unknown reason, I don't ever see myself getting romantic with another man again. I know because I can feel it.

How do I know he's the love of my life? (I will continue forward with what I have learned in my second marriage with the 10 reasons below still applicable towards anyone I get involved with.)

1. I'm not embarrassed at all of him (compared to my ex)
2. I feel happiness
3. I put effort in and so does he.
4. Even though I don't get to see him as often as I'd like, the time we have together is worth it.
5. He treats me as an equal but doesn't let me forget that I'm a female too.
6. He actually listens to me on most stuff.
7. We discuss stuff together before we do something big/costly.
8. He makes up for me being laid back and I remind him to relax due to his workaholic ways.
9. He's even calmer than I am when I get hot-headed. I have my moments; I blame it on my mom, grandma and great-grandma for being red heads.
10. We talk, not yell, at each other as adults; not like children.

Not all relationships work this way but I'd say the most important part to take away from this is:
1. If you are embarrassed of your lover then it's gonna be hard for it to work out.
2. If only one person is putting in the effort into the relationship.
3. Discuss things in a calm manner, not acting like kids yelling at each other.
4. That you have to do/like everything that the other does. It's ok to have separate hobbies. You are still two separate people. There's nothing wrong with doing your own separate hobbies or dis/likes.


But if you're in a difficult situation please PM me and I'll try my best to reply and most of all guide/advice you on what I believe would be best.