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Genre: Er... Easter silliness? Okay, yeah, more fluff.
Rating: Let's say PG, just to be safe.

Battle of the Bunnies
by Loki'sRose

In the early hours of Easter morning, Ian frantically searched his little shop for a certain (rather unbecoming) costume.

"I'm late, I'm late," he muttered, throwing unwanted clothes across the room. A shirt landed on the bench, on top of Rufus, who had been peacefully asleep. The cat opened one eye and glared at Ian.

"What are you doing?"

"Rufus, have you seen my Easter Bunny costume?" Ian asked, sorting through a pile of trousers.

Rufus jumped off the bench with a sigh, and padded over. "Okay, yes," he admitted. "Yes I have."

Ian looked at him hopefully. "Where is it?"

"Durem Reclamation Facility."

"What?" Ian asked, surprised. "What's it doing there?"

"Being shredded by angry fish, I hope." Rufus sat down and began licking his paw, managing to convey both embarrassment and unrepentance at the same time.

"Rufus! You threw away my Easter Costume? How could you? Think of all those cute girls out there waiting to get an egg and a phone number from their special bunny! What am I going to do?"

"Go back to bed?" Rufus suggested.

"I'm going to go get my costume," Ian retorted, grabbing his hat and ramming it on his head. "It may not be much, but someone has to do something. For the babes."

Ian stormed outside, and ran straight into a huge metal statue. He blinked at it in surprise, then prodded it with a finger. A massive metal head swung around and glowing red eyes stared down at him. A deep but somewhat tinny voice echoed from where the thing's mouth should have been.

"I AM the Easter Bunny. Many thought that I did not exist and yet here we are - face to face."

Ian backed off a few steps. "Uh, great. Nice to have you with us. Love the chrome."

It moved again with the noisy churn of gears, turning to face Ian.

"You think you can do better? You are my rival and must be... terminated."

"Huh? No, no, I was just... Going fishing?"

With further worrying sounds of tortured mechanics, the Bunny took a heavy step towards Ian and raised his... Carrot? It was nevertheless a clearly threatening gesture. Ian backed all the way back to the door of his shop. He stumbled slightly as something unexpected brushed past his leg, but kept his balance with the practiced grace of a long-time cat owner.

Rufus looked up at the Bunny. The Bunny craned its metal neck to look down at him. Rufus scratched himself. The Bunny returned its attention to Ian. The giant carrot clicked with a sound that could only be described as 'safety off'. Ian swallowed, and wondered whether Sasha would miss him. Rufus ran between the robot's legs.

The robot... lacked the practiced grace of a long-time cat owner. It rocked. It staggered. Ian gave it a thoughtful look and kicked it in the metal shin, and finally it toppled to the ground.

"You will not get away with this, human! For I am the Easter B-"

The booming voice died away, and the red glow faded from the Bunny's eyes. Rufus jumped up onto its armoured chest, holding a cord in his mouth.

"Way to go, Rufus," said Ian, hoping none of the girls had seen him being menaced by the Easter Bunny. "How'd you do it?"

Rufus spat out the cord, and Ian picked it up. It was a power cord. "You unplugged it! Clever cat! Wonder what it was attached to?"

"Go to bed, Ian, it's so late it's early," said Rufus, but he wasn't fast enough. Ian was already following the cord down the street and out of town. With a sigh, the cat went back to his basket.

Ian let the power cord lead him through the dark streets and into unfamiliar territory. High walls rose up around him, forbidding and metallic.

"Just the place for a robot bunny," he muttered to himself, looking around. "This must be Aekea."

Sure enough, the cord led deep into the new town and through the window of one of the shops. Ian ducked down and put his ear to the wall. The sounds inside were not reassuring. Bangs, metallic clanks and muffled swearing were just audible. Then something hit the wall with a thump. Ian moved back quickly.

There could be anything inside, he thought to himself. Another robot - and army of robots! The sensible thing to do would be to go home. But what would Rufus say if he knew he'd come all this way and then just gone home? Worse, what would Moira think? Straightening his shoulders and adjusting his hat, Ian marched over to the shop and flung the door wide open.

Fortunately there was no army. There was, however, a muscular man angrily pushing buttons on what looked very much like a remote control. It wasn't having much effect. The man opened his mouth to yell, but Ian reacted first.

"You!" he cried.

"You!" retorted the other man, dropping his remote. "What are you doing in my shop?"

"You're that guy that was dancing with Ruby at the Ball! You sent a giant robot to my house!"

"You're the guy that's been hogging all the cute girls! You sabotaged my Easter RoBunny!"

They stood for a moment, glaring at each other, tension in the air as thick as Aekea smog. Then Ian chuckled awkwardly and tipped his hat.

"Well, I guess your robot is a lot better than my Easter costume. Did you build it yourself? I'm Ian."

The guy gave him a puzzled look, his anger deflating, but only slightly. "Liam," he said warily. "Yeah. Thanks. What did you do to it?"

"My cat pulled out its plug." Ian smiled. "I never expected an Easter Bunny with that many muscles."

Liam glanced down at his remote control, embarrassed. "I wanted to impress the ladies."

Ian looked at the other man's athletic build, tan and tank top, then down at his own slightly crumpled brown suit. Rival, he thought. Ah. "The ladies don't impress easily. Trust me."

This got another glare.

"I wouldn't say I exactly hog the girls," Ian continued. "I just know how to deal with them."

"It's the hat, isn't it?" said Liam flatly. "I should get a hat."

"Well, that'd get Ruby on side," Ian agreed. He wasn't entirely sure why he thought it was a good idea to advise the guy, but then, someone who sculpted pecs on robot bunnies obviously needed to get out more. Ian wondered whether he'd modelled them on himself. "Look," he said, "maybe I could help you out, give you some advice? What do you say?"

Liam rubbed one excessively muscly shoulder, his expression guarded. "What's in it for you?"

Ian laughed. "Come on, it's Easter. There's bound to be plenty of chicks about for both of us!"

"I'll... walk you home," said Liam. "I need to fix my RoBunny."

The end.

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