Welcome to Gaia! ::



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stare Welcome to the home of Sarcastic Kitty, where... what else? Sarcasm reigns. ^_^ stare
Serving Gaia's Sarcasm Needs Since: Feb 9th, 2004






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+20 gold per kitty with one of the available sayings on it, 30 for one with a custom saying on it. (Note: all customs must be sarcastic. (Btw, this isn't me trying to be some sort of sarcasm-judging nazi or anything. I just want to make sure he's not saying something like... "Look at me. I'm a kitty." -_-)

+All avatar heads cost 30, whether you use one of my sayings or a custom. And these, by the way, don't HAVE to be sarcastic... but hey, that's the whole point, neh? ^_^

Note: I can be bribed. Ha! ^_^



Note: If you order multiples, it can't be animated so that all the sayings are in one image- sorry about that! Anyone you see with a S.K that's animated... well, they rigged it themselves- which you are more than welcome to do!... But I won't do it. So there. ^_^



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Step 1: You post, saying which cat(s) you want. If you want a custom, please state if you want your custom saying on an Avatar head, or on a kitty. Oh- and also, if you get multiples, I'll send you all separate images, unless you ask for otherwise. (And if you've been a customer before, please let me know... 'cause I have trouble remembering, after 800+ customers!)

Step 2: Please send me a trade. Lol- don't wait for me, cause I'm slower than dirt. 3nodding

Step 3: And I send you the address at which you can pick up your very own sarcastic kitty! Thanks so much for buying; you're great! ^_~

Step 4: I don't host- so don't ask. ^_^


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Please don't..

For the love of all that is sarcastic and good
+ Ask for SK in another color. stare He's a black cat. He likes being a black cat. (This decision has just been made. Lol.) I may make SK cousins, sometime in the future... but for now, all you get is SK.

+ Tell me I must add you as an affiliate. Guess what? If you ask, I'll say yes. Lol. I'm a pushover. ^_~ But I don't like being demanded to do anything. -_- "Pull open your parachute line!" ...."No. I refuse." lol.

+ Say "I want one!" ...and then... never post which one. O.o Miss Cleo I am not. ^_~

+ Give your SK to a friend...without telling me. I have no problem with your giving them as gifts- as long as you TEEELLL MEEEEE.

+ Offer me sayings for the shop. ^_~ I will always keep 'customs' open, because everyone should be able to enjoy their own caliber of sarcasm- but I want the shop to remain as original as possible. Which is why the sayings are original. ^_^ (o_O And certainly don't say you'll let me BUY sayings from you. That's just rich... Mwa ha... ^_^)



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heart List of Available S.K sayings. heart :

A) You are what you eat. Y'ever hear that? Man, I feel sorry for anorexic people. I'd hate to be nothing.
B) Aren't you one of the signs of the apocalypse?
C) You are where brain cells go to die.
D)Cat got your brain?
E) [sarcasm]I love you[/sarcasm]
F) Shut up, I'm having a rhetorical conversation.
G) The humor of the moronic elite has always escaped me.
H) I never finish anythi
I) Live life to the fullest. Aka? EAT, damnit!
J) Why don't you call God and complain?
K) They say the only things that keep growing as you get older is your nose and your ears. ...Yeah right. Tell that to my a**.
L) They say history repeats itself. Great, I'll catch it the next time around.
M) I wish get out of jail free cards were real.
N) My idea of a balanced diet is having more than 2 colors of M&M's.
O) Don't mess with me- my nicotine patch fell off.
P) If I wanted to hide something from you, I'd just use polysyllabic words.
Q) Either stop talking, or get within punching range.
R) Your wit is razor sharp. Too bad you can't use it on your wrists.
S) Nuns are cute. Of course, you can't just...go up and pinch a nun's cheek. You'd go to hell. And then all the other sinners would make fun of you.
T) Lay down your scruples and come in for a while- we'll have fun.
U) Just when I think you're as shallow as you could possibly be, you manage to drain a little more out of the pool.
V) My favorite pastime is drowning Sims in the pool.
W) Life is an STD
X) Must you go? I was just poisoning the tea.
Y) This is my life. Everyone else is just an extra.
Z) If I had a heart of gold, I'd sell it.

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AA) Keep talking. You may have to end the conversation with St. Peter... but keep talking.
BB) Welcome to "Go-away"ville. Population? You.
CC) Go ahead, chew my a** out. I'm willing to bet I have more a** than you have teeth.
DD) He's in a class all his own. Unfortunately, it's special ed.
EE) Cremation?!?! Over my dead body!
FF) I think I just had a near-life experience...
GG) I'm the white sheep of the family.
HH) Wow. That joke died faster than a carnival goldfish.
II) You know, you have the ability of lighting up a room...just by leaving it.
JJ) Don't worry. With a face like yours, you could always drive a cab.
KK) If life were fair, there'd be an oreo tree in my backyard.
LL) I'm part of a cult. It's tough, but there are its perks. All the Koolaid I want...
MM) I'm not responsible for what I say after four.
NN) Jesus Saves. ...That's why he gets such great interest returns.

heart !NEW! sayings. heart :

OO I have no vacancies for the vacant of intelligence.
PP Ignorance is bliss. ...I'll take your word for it.
QQ You are two karate classes away from an a** kicking.
RR Just to save us both time, I plead the fifth.
SS There are folks whose faces really need my fist in 'em.
TT I'd hate to be a twin. ...I have too strong a feeling I'd be the evil one.
UU I see your humor doesn't keep well in captivity.
VV Highly talented... potentially insane.
WW Prevent suicide: don't kill yourself.
XX Go ahead. Keep pushing me. ...I just hope your mother has a black dress.
YY And what bridge do you live under?
ZZ Yeah, I pick up hitchhikers. ...Otherwise they bleed all over my floor.


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ANY of my lovely donators- whether it be just an extra 10g on your order or more- will get this sarcastic (what else?) but very appreciative donators cat. Of course, he'll not have the big sample s on him.
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And NEW! anyone who donates more than 600g gets this new donator's thank you. ( mrgreen The thank you for rich people. Mwa ha ha...)

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Many congratulations to our first 8 successful Sk Sponsored Questers- Yannah, Menelie, Aeren, Keppit, ll Fiona ll, Carnal_Solstice!, Keika, and childapocalypse!

Sk customarily has a sponsored quester, who... well... I sponsor! XD They receive a percentage of all Sk profits- and 100% of any special sales and limiteds. (Including the tips/donations attached to those trades.) They also remain here until they reach their goal, so all you WONDERFUL Sk fans & patrons can be generous and go take a look! But right now, Em is saving up for an art contest, so she's temporarily suspended the charity. Sorry guys!

Waiting List:

+None! (And currently not accepting waiting list applications ^_^



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This is the section dedicated to the Sk-related gifts that I receive! I LURVE gifts, and I think that anyone who goes to the wonderful trouble of makin' little ol' me something to swoon over, should get a little attention. XD

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A wonderful image from Amylb22! And my first Sk gift in a long while. ^_^ Innit deviously cute? ^_^
heart heart OWNERS LIST heart heart
ps... if I forgot you, just tell me. ...Or shmack me. Either way. Lol.
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The owners list has been moved to a Completely New Forum


# of Owners::

817

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Other Info:


Link to me:

[URL=http://www.gaiaonline.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=8111920] [img]http://tinyurl.com/8lsqh[/img][/URL]

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[url=http://www.gaiaonline.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=8111920]
[img]http://tinyurl.com/6jv5r[/img][/url]

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Visit my Breedable:

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Please make note:

stare Almost ALL of these are original, meaning they are of my own inane creation. ^_~ So I'd appreciate, that if you decide to use a quote, and NOT buy a kitty... that you give me some line of credit, and please don't pass them off as your own.

stare Please don't alter these images! You can use them in your sigs, put them in banners- I don't mean THAT sort of altering- I mean primarily, mutilating the poor little sarcastic thing. And don't take my name off- it's barely visible, anyway, so it shouldn't 'get in your way' especially. ^_~ domokun 3nodding
heart AFFILIATES:

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Hiatus..

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User ImageI have strange pet peeves, I know... but I have a personal 'eye-roll factor' when I see people have questions in their 'faq' that are obviously not 'frequently asked questions'. ^_~ So these are just... moderately asked questions. ...Or just things that won't fit anywhere else. Mwa ha.. (If you have questions you'd like added here... well, ask 'em, and I might just do that.

What's the cat's name?

:: Sk. (Pronounced like initials.) And.. er... o_O The shop name's Sk too. Or, at least, that's the abbreviation. *cough*... Don't ask.

How did you think this up? O_o

::*shrug* I wanted money. Lol. I keep little notebooks and moleskines filled with story ideas, and names I like... jokes I come up with, etc. And I made this little black cat to be sold in a Halloween shop back in October, when I joined. He was actually just one of... four cats. That he looked sarcastic, was a complete accident. So... sayings... plus cat equals... Sk. Poof. Feline Frankenstein.

Why 20g?

:: Why not? ^_~ To be honest, this shop isn't work at all- after all, Sk was 'born' back in October, and the sayings have all been come up with at other times... and I'm just selling reproductions. Why charge a lot of money for something that's so easy to create? ^_~ That, and I don't really want anything on gaia- no wishlist, nothing like that. My money just goes to charities, anyway.

Why is he just black??

:: Er... *cough*.. well, to be perfectly honest, I don't like change. ^_~ *Ever notice how I never change this outfit, practically?* Sk likes being a black cat. It suits him. I really DO have him in other colors. I do. ...It's just never won the 'what's next' polls I put up. So they stay in the cupboard. mwa haa...

Did you come up with the sayings?

::Yes. Except for two. ^_~

Can I give you/sell you sayings for the shop??

:: Lol. o_O SELL me sayings? Aaaah... no. No thank you. And I'm not accepting sayings as 'gifts' either. ^_^ I'd like to keep Sk as original as possible, so that when people come in to slander it, the Sk possee can attack them with that point, that it's original, and not copied.

Can I work for you?/Need a staff?

:: Nope, sorry. ^_~ Like I said, this place hardly needs ME to run it, as it is.

o_O That cat just insulted me!!

:: sweatdrop Heh heh.. yeaaah... sorry about that. *no refunds...* Mwa ha...

What do I have to do, to get on the Newsletter List???

:: Just add SarcasticKittyNewsletter to your friendlist! *And have been a customer.*

Where's your blacklist?

:: I don't believe in them, actually. If you are inappropriate or rude... I'll just ask you to apologize, or to leave. It's as simple as that. And, if you come into Sk again, this time nicely, I'll do business with you.
A Special Thank You To:

heart NoirRaven, for making the front banner for me. Much appreciated. ^_^
heart remean, for the wonderful drawing of SK and me in the first post.
heart Azn Chix0r, for the adorable little me-sprite on the owners list.
heart Bunny Faerii, for the wonderful Sk stickers at the bottom of the owners list. ^_^
heart The Laur- when I hit 200 customers, she made me that wonderful animated present on the owners list. *smooch* She's my heeerrooo.... ^_^ Lol.
heart Tandemonium, for the breathtaking pic of me & Sk that's in the MAQ. Much love!
heart Chickie_pie, for reformatting my owners list and taking care of all duplicate posters. It seriously needed doing.
heart All American Wet Back for Sk's birthday banners, and the new Sk graveyard & Halloween Banners. Aren't they spifferiffic? ^_^ Yay!
heart Blaze-kun, for reformatting my affiliates list. Also seriously needed doing.

eek Workin' from the ButtCrack o' dawn Log: eek

Can she say that? .... ..... ..... ...... ..... ...... ..... ..... ..... ..... ...... ...... ..... ...... ...... ...... ...... ..... ...... ...... ...... I dunno.

(2007)

+17.JuneJaysus, we've been open for a long time... ^_^


(2006)

+30.MarchFinally, the Sk sayings are 'complete'- oo-zz are now up.
+18.MarchWhoo hoo! We hit 800 customers!!!
+1.JanuaryThe SK Secret Santa, which took place in the breedable s section with the help of the fantastic artist Missa, has taken place this past month- and it was a great success! I think the final sale count was 104. Fabulous, neh? ^_^ Also, the Sk Christmas limiteds went up, and are now finally off the shelves. It's a new year for Sk!! Soon, in February, we'll be celebrating two years as a minishop. (I smell a big shindig a comin'!)

(2005)

+17.OctoberIt's Sk's Second Birthday!! (the cat, not the shop. XD) Happy BIRTHDAY, SK!!!
+9.October The Sk graveyard is up again! And a new Halloween limited, and a freebie... and Sk is participating in the Faerie Carnival and the Pixel Shifter/Tandemonium shop's trick-or-treat fun! (Which reminds me, I have to put that banner up... eep...) Also, Sk turns TWO YEARS OLD on the 17th!! *sniff* Mah lil' bebbe is growin' up!! His birthday thread is set up and waiting for the big day.
+14.July Added the Sk fan club! Whoo hoo!
+13.July Aaah... nothin' like a nice, long break in keeping a shop log. o_o *smacks self in forehead* Well, last year I had a few months where the shop was closed- mostly for the sake of all the horrid glitches. However, a few weeks ago the archive glitch spit my shop back out (hallelujah!... Although Sk was covered in Gaia spit. Had to shove him in the drier with tongs. o_o Maaaad kitty...), but I decided to keep the new thread because I'd already reformatted it and added to my owners list. I also had chickie_pie reformat my owners list for me- go through, and make sure I didn't have any duplicate names, mostly. When you get up in the late 600's, it's easy to forget who you've sold to! Anyway, a few days ago I put up two new limiteds and the 600+ donators cat- the first colored Sk to go on hte market. And it's PINK! He must have keeled over dead to see it, too, because he's an angel. XD

(2004)

+25.June. The second Sk sponsored Special Event is up- the poetry contest. The 3rd newsletter also went out (and I've been working on updating the newsletter list.)... and now, I'm a little bored. ^_^ So I've been looking into completing the sayings... but I always say that, don't I? ^_~
+23.May. Sayings aa-nn have been up since..oh, a few days after the last poll, essentially. ^_^ I'll be adding oo-zz when I get my regular computer hooked up to the internet, and I'm not ciphoning off of someone else's connection. (As is always fun to do.) The new limited went up today.... and every second I keep looking out the window to make sure I won't get electrocuted or something.. (s'a huge thunder/lightning storm. ^_^) Oh! And just now I updated all my affiliates- I checked on each and every one- and anyone who was no longer linking Sk, got deleted. ^_^ Mwa ha.

+3.May.: Well, the first ever "Sk poll" has been up for... mm..... almost two days, I guess- and boy, I never knew how much traffic comes through the minishop area and/or Sk. O_o I already have almost 100 votes. Hm. Well, I'm glad that 'new sayings' is probably going to be the winner- I've been wondering when I should put those up. The showcase is going down today, and I've sent out thank you's to everyone who particpated...Oohh... I still have one more letter to send. I almost forgot. ^_^ Well, besides that- Sk's cleared 300 customers, and over 200 pages- I'll be sending out the second Sk newsletter eventually, when I have the new sayings up. All in all, Sk is running smoothly. Amen to that. ^_~

+9.Apr.: Today was a busy Sk day- I FINALLY got the showcase up and running- although I'm a little disappointed that, with some of the frames that disappeared, so did some of the entries- Anatolia made something, Jblob... (although Jblob doesn't have a regular shop anymore, I still would have liked to include it in the showcase.) But all in all, it's UP, and it's running smoothly (knock on wood). I think it's already started to generate some more revenue for my minishop 'colleagues' ^_^. The first Sk newsletter went out today, complete w/ all the more 'exciting' Sk news- this is just the rantings of a girl up at 3:41 in the morning on a Thursday evening, after all. Finished the Easter gifts, sent the one out to the Newsletter Members, and posted the other on the thread. And now, I'm going to turn the computer off... and go to sleep. It should be a lovely rest. Ta.

+18.Mar.: Well, I spent a lloooong time on... er... Monday, I think it was, sending a letter w/ a St. Patrick's Day special edition kitty gift to each and every one of my customers, past and present- and I posted the free-for-all St. Patrick's Day kitty. O.o Aka? I sat in front of a computer for more time than any one human should do and still retain their sight. Showcase goes up soon, and I'll be building lots of great gifts for my owners for Easter.

+26.Feb.: I'm going to be working primarily on the showcase today, with Mistress Bian- just so I can get it all ready to 'go up'... because I'm leaving tomorrow, and the shop will be closed for what may be as long as two weeks. (Which is, ironically, about how long we've been open. ^_~) But this may not be the case- I'll try as hard as I can to get internet access while I'm gone. ...Oh yeah, and I'm almost done w/ the St. Patrick's day gifts for my owners, and maybe even a little some'n for the collective. Mwa ha.

+22.Feb.: Still putting together the showcase- I went and cleaned up some of the shop layout a little, still having issues with some banners *insert Yosemite Sam-esque curses here*, and... well, huh. I dunno what to say. Eh, that's enough news for now.

+16.Feb.: Went through old pixelly critters I've drawn... tried to make an expansion of "Mockery Pandas"... but I just couldn't do it. Damn Pandas were just too cute to be insulting. Rats. Damn Pandas.

+13.Feb.: Closed early to work on more stock. ...Which means I will be up till one in the morning... thinking sarcastic things about people and situations. ^_^ This is what I live for.

+11.Feb.: Decided to update the shop... gained a lovely bumper, gave out Valentines Gifts to all of my customers (Yay ^_^)... and have plans to add more kats, and more sayings. (Which means? More work... lol. Oh joy.)
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First, I'd like to apologize for the cute little sign... sweatdrop I was in a cutesy mood when I made it. You'll be happy to know that Sk glued my hands into a pair of mittens as I slept as soon as he saw it... o_o ...Do you know how hard it is to type with mittens superglued to your hands?

Anywho- I've had three people in the last week ask me if there was something other than the Newsletter that they could sign up to get special stuff from the shop. So why not an Sk fan club? Members will get special merchandise, be able to buy limiteds past the 'cutoff date', and every... saaaay... 15 members I get, I'll hold a free raffle where there's some nifty prize involved. All members will be listed here, and the bonuses of membership will increase the more members sign up.


What do I have to do to be a member?

Well, since this is a fan club, and not just the newsletter signup, you have to own at least 10 Sk's, and then let me know you're interested(Or you could have bought that number for someone else. Total purchase has to be at least 10, basically.) Then, just post in the thread or PM me that you want to join the Sk groupies *cough* I mean, fan club... and I'll shtick your name right here and poof! Member-ola. (Note: I won't add you unless you tell me you want to be- in other words, every person who orders 10 or more won't be automatically put on the list!)



Members:

1.SwordMasterZ
2.Diem Adrienne
3.Monkeylovefirework
4.vio.child
5.chenali
6.Ajax Blacknight
7.Mauimia
8.Watanuki-kun
9.Jade13
10.Fangirl_Shishi
11. .Neon Glowsticks.
12.Bob Dobbs
13.Menelie
14.CeCeT_nekogurl
15.Rybus Ryo
16.Carmlita
17.Heiroglyphica
18.Kanilea
19.koritsimou
20.Asru
21.bp56
22.Terrenity
23.Hanaka Yume
24.Sin_of_Shadow
25.Namida_Tai
26.Balinese
27.KaShash
heart SK Newsletter heart


+If you'd like to be notified of new sales, get Sk freebies through the mail, and hear about all the newest fun shop news, just add SarcasticKittyNewsletter to your friendslist. You only need to have been a customer in the past- or own any Sk. (Including ones that were given to you, or the freebies that are posted periodically in the shop.) heart
* ^_^ Reservoid for future manipulation. heart
Emelyn
Reservoid for future manipulation. biggrin heart *mwa ha ha*
And... that's it. ^_~
^^ i want a kittie
Yay^^ It's the sarcastic kitties! surprised

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