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 Posted: Fri Nov 09, 2007 8:46 pm
Nyota had left Banji's side in the middle of the night to let her mind wander. Banji was very nice to her, yes, but nothing would replace what her son meant to her. She wondered how Senene was doing, if she was still in the jungle with...with Amri. And maybe how Amri was doing. Hopefully he was being good to their daughter, and that they were happy. She regretted leaving now, getting spooked and bolting from the jungle. There were just some things that she couldn't help, though.
She knew that the feather was still around her neck. She played with the idea to use it, but the security of having it there for when she needed to speak with Mana would disappear, as well. What should she do? She looked up to the stars for an answer, but didn't know where to even begin to look.
That was, until a familiar feeling seemed to envelop her, and she smiled. Smiled brightly for the first time in a long time. It seemed that the answer had found her, instead of her looking for that answer.
"Mana," she said warmly.
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Posted: Fri Nov 09, 2007 8:53 pm
The wind goddess had heard the call, without her feather actually being used. The feather was, though, nothing more then a formality. The goddess had a good talent at coming to visit her 'children', as she liked to think of them, when they most needed her. And tonight seemed like the night that she was most needed by the child called Nyota.
She emerged from her burst of wind, the golden glows much more dull tonight. She only really needed them the first time she visited someone, otherwise it just seemed a bit too flashy for her taste. She answered Nyota's smile with her own, giving the small lioness a nuzzle.
"Nyota, my child. It has been too long! You should call on me more, I am always here for you." She chided lightly, knowing that something was wrong, very wrong, just with the way Nyota carried herself.
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Posted: Fri Nov 09, 2007 8:59 pm
The lioness blushed, a bit embarassed. "But I thought that I could only use the feather once..." her voice trailed off as she looked at the poor thing that hung around her neck. It was completely tattered, much of the original fluff and beauty long worn off from both normal everyday life and the incident with the demon. She pitied it, since it used to be such a beautiful thing. Even whatever she was gifted with ended up dirty and tattered, like herself.
"Well, I can't even take good are of it, either..." She stumbled over her words, instinctively inching a bit closer to the warm goddess. Somehow, though Nyota couldn't explian it, she felt like Mana really could of been her mother, with the way that she treated her. It was...really nice.
She knew that Mana was here because her heart called out to her, but Nyota didn't know how she would bring up her concerns. It had been...so long, Mana didn't know anything about her son.
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Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 7:51 am
Mana smiled, nearly laughing at Nyota. "Aaah, well, I actually only say that so whomever I give a feather to does not depend on me to be there every day of their lives. There are some things that I need to attent to, as well!" She laid herself down now, letting her long wings relax, but using one to help pull Nyota down next to her for a comfortable position. What Nyota had to say might take a while, mattering on how much she wanted to say.
"No worries about the feather, dear Nyota. You can always have another one, a fresh one that will look beautiful." Mana really adored Nyota. Such a sweet soul trapped in the clutched of bad luck. Mana was not of Luck, though, only of Wind, and there was nothing she could do to fix it. Just encourage Nyota so perhaps she could free herself from it.
"Now, I can tell that there is something you want to say. And it might be hard to say, but I am here for you, and will listen when you are ready."
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Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 8:04 am
Nyota let the goddess' wing guide her down to the golden goddess' side, snuggling up to its warmth. Somehow, Mdhamana was always so warm, in body and in spirit. It was nearly intoxicating, and let her mind feel a bit more free, to the point where her worries did not eat at her, or consume her. It was as if Mana was here to keep her away from the cold darkness that her madness would drag her into. Something that Nyota had never made a connection to, until now.
She chewed on her lower lip, though, when Mana seemed to see right through her. She knew that something was wrong, and how was Nyota to hide it? She wasn't going to be able to. So, then, where to start?
"Well, Mana, after the last time you visited me, I met someone. He was very kind, a bit like me. I don't know if I'd say I fell in love, 'cause I don't think I did, but I felt comfortable with him. Even bore two children. But it was hard, because...because he was a leopard." She didn't know how Mana felt about love that crossed the races, but she hoped that she wouldn't mind, not like how some looked down on her son like a freak. He was far from it.
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Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 8:51 am
"Oh?" was all that the goddess said at first. She wasn't sure where the story was going, but there was something that did go on that not many accepted. It was the truth, no matter what anyone said. There were some things that were just not meant to happen, but they did happen to Nyota, and her children. She did not look down on Nyota, though. If she really was happy then, then why did she leave them?
She took another moment to let the thought toss around in her mind before vocalizing it. "Then, what happened to them, Nyota? I do not see anyone else around you." She stated that face with a glance around them before turning her attention back to the small brown lioness. She knew this wasn't the whole of the story, and wanted to hear more. She'd push Nyota as much as she dared. It might be easier, since she had started, and that was the hardest part.
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Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 9:00 am
Nyota knew that she had started, and there was no way that she could stop now. She had to keep going. She sighed, giving herself a moment to gather her thoughts, and answer the deep question that Mana had asked. It may of not sounded like a deep question, but it's contents were. Where were they? She had left them....all of them. There was nothing else to say about it, no other way to get around that fact. It was the truth.
"I left them," she admitted. "I left Amri and my daughter Senene in the jungle. I became scared when I did not see them for a short while, and I bolted from there with my son Hifadhi. It wasn't easy, but we did okay."
She wanted to avoid mentioning to Mana what had happened to Hifa, so instead she would make her ask for it. It was mean, cruel, she'd admit, but sometimes it felt easier to answer things instead of just stating them.
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Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 9:22 am
"Nyota," Mana said calmly, though she knew what Nyota had done was a grave mistake on her part. She could tell that the lioness regretted it, though, so she wouldn't say anything else on the matter. There was something else that was missing in the story. What happened to her son, Hifadhi? She gave the brown lioness a nudge to encourage her to continue.
The gold goddess watched the brown lioness' body language carefully, trying to judge just how upset she was by the way she shifted her weight, the amount of pauses she took, as well as the way she was avoiding any sorts of eye contact. Not good.
She wrapped her wing a bit more around Nyota, hoping that it would calm her a bit more so she'd continue. "Then what, my child?" Mana knew that Nyota was fishing for that question, and she would gladly gie it to her, if it would make her speak about the subject. Sometimes just talking about something would make it better.
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Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 9:32 am
"Well....well...." Nyota stalled, not wanting the images of Hifadhi lying there, dead, before her. A piece of her still couldn't believe that he was dead, but most of her began to accept it. She'd never see him again. His smile, his curiosity, his warmth...never. It was completely gone.
"He's gone. Just a while back, we were attacked by some...some demon thing, made of black flames. And...and it killed him! I couldn't stop it...I don't even know what it was, Mana. It just...trying to kill me afterwards, but I fled. I left his body there, for the thing to consume!" Her voice became shrill, but she didn't cry. She had cried everything out already, and so the only thing still driving her about the situation was shock.
"I just....I can't believe I left him there, Mana. I can't. I regret it so much, everything..." She burried her head in her paws, wishing to hide herself from all the msitakes that she had made.
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Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 9:37 am
Mana cooed to the distraut lioness, grooming the top of her head to calm her down. A terrible incident indeed! While licking the nerves away from the lioness, Mana let her mind race, trying to figure out just what had attacked her. It had to of been a god. But what god would do something like that? Certainly there weren't any gods that were that dark, to just go on a killing spree for the hell of it. If this was true, there was something that had to be done. She would have to figure out how to assist with this, while also keeping her word with Tawa'di. Tricky indeed.
"Shhh, Nyota, Nyota. There was nothing else you could of done. What if you did go back? What if that creature was still there? Perhaps you escaped your death, but if you went back, you might of sealed your fate, then." Mana secretly was pelased that Nyota had not died, for she was her favourite of the mortals she watched over. Such a troubled creature with a great heart, it attracted the wind goddess with curiosity.
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Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 9:46 am
Nyota's claws flexed into the ground, frusterated as to why the goddess didn't see what she saw. How could she live, knowing that she failed to protect her son? It was something that went against the laws of nature, in her mind. How was a mother supposed to bury her child? Her son? Mind, she didn't bury, persay, but she did have to bury her in her mind. And that was enough to destroy the any hint of pure happiness that was left in her mind.
"But Mana, what...what if I feel that there is nor eason left for me to live? I wish I had died back there, stayed there and died with Hifadhi, so that I don't have to live without him anymore!" She choked back a tear that threatened to fall, determined not to cry in front of the goddess. She felt that she was past the point of tears, and to the point where she just didn't care anymore.
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Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 9:54 am
Mana shifted herself around so she could get a good look at Nyota's face, she she had pulled it up in her little fit of self pity. Were mortals always like this? She had a flash of irritation as she felt as if Nyota wasn't thinking of anyone but herself. She debated on just how to tell Nyota this, but figured that she would let her tongue fly, since being blunt was sometimes the best way to say it.
"Nyota. Please, think outside of yourself. How would I feel if I found out you had died? It would destroy a bit of me, as well. I care about you, and so you need to think about me, as well. I understand that you are upset, but I'm sure that you will find something else to keep you going." She nodded. "You just need to look for it."
Simple enough, she was sure that Nyota would figure something out. Mana was not hinting at anything, since she knew that Nyota was smart enough to find something to live for.
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Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 10:00 am
Nyota's cheeks flushed with embarassment and shame when she realized just what Mana was telling her. That at least someone did care about her. Why? Nyota couldn't answer that, but it was that feeling that there was love there, and there really didn't need to be a reason why. It was just there. The lioness lowered her head onto the ground, not wanting to look at Mana for fear she would lose herself again, but in a different way.
"I'm sorry," she apologized, letting her mind wander back towards Banji. Well...there was someone else, but she reminded herself he was just guiding her to the swamplands to find a new home. So perhaps there was something...even if it was a short something.
"Thank you, though, Mana." She said, letting herself relax again, just thinking about the time she was spending with her friend. She would soon doze off, as it was the middle of the night, curled up next to Mana's warm side.
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Posted: Sat Nov 10, 2007 10:05 am
Mana nodded towards Nyota warmly, "Good girl." Now that Nyota at least had that as a shakeup, Mdhamana was certain that she would see Nyota again another day, and then she would tell her what it was that kept her going. Be it with another male, or a new place to call home, there would be something that she would want to share with the goddess. Good.
She sighed, letting Nyota curl up against her side while the goddess looked out at the lands before them. So much to do, and such little time to do it all! While gods lived forever, mortals lives were not so blessed, and her matters all had to do with mortals, and their lives. Tawa'di. This fire demon Nyota mentioned. So much work to do, and Mana didn't know where to start.
With a sigh, she gave Nyota a nuzzle, knowing that she was asleep. With a flick of her mane, she left a new feather for her friend, one to replace the old, tattered one that she had given her so long ago. That would be a reminder about how the goddess kept her word.
And with a small gust of a warm breeze, even in the middle of the night, the goddess vanished again.
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