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wow, there are a lot of blonde jokes.
@jesse-i like yours best. xd

A man and a woman are driving down the same road at the same time.
As they pass each other the woman leans out the window, points and yells, “PIG! ”

The man immediately leans out his window, shakes his fist and shouts back, “WITCH!"

They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he slams into a pig that had wandered into the middle of the road.

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver's license?
Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?
Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.

Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Captain: Sir, can I see your license?
Driver: Sure. Here it is.

It was valid.

Captain: Who's car is this?
Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the owner's card.

The driver owned the car.

Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there's a gun in it?
Driver: Yes, sir, but there's no gun in it.

Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.

Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there's a body in it.
Driver: No problem.

Trunk is opened; no body.

Captain: I don't understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn't have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.

Driver: Yeah, I'll bet the lying s.o.b. told you I was speeding, too!

rofl i dont think it would play out the same though rofl

lol!

Armed forces joke

Sadam and his advisor were driving through the roads of Bagdahd.They ran over a pig in the road and stopped before the ownners house. Sadam tells his advisor to jump down and go apologize for the pig. The man jumps down and enters the familys house. He is gone for an hour and then return.

"What took you so long?" Sadam asks.

The advisor looks confused. "The family showered me with gifts and fed me, even allowed me time with their eldest daughter!"

Sadam frown, "what did you say?"

"I said... 'I left Saddam in the road, I have come to say I killed the pig."
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
If you don't get it... heres a blond joke...

a blonde walks to a farmer. "Sir, I can't tell my horses apart. Help me?" The farmer tells her to cut a notch in one of the horses ear. She does. The other horse gets in a fight and looses a notch of his ear. The blonde goes back to the farmer, "Now what?" He says cut one of the tails shorter. She does, the other horse gets caught ina fence and his tail has to be cut to untangle. The blonde goes back to the farmer, "Now what?" the farmer asks what markings the horses have. The blonde says, "Ones whit with black spots, the other one is sorta reddish brown."

Yes, that first one was quite the laugh riot, but Jesse, which first one were you talking about, mine with the 2 kids, or hers about Saddam

YEA The ylove it!!1 I'll ask my dad about more. I have those coll deck of cards with all there faces on it too...! domokun heart

Everyones are good though heart