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 Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2005 5:40 am
~v~Lady Venom~v~ Aw, well you're bound to miss her atleast a bit. it's good to hear about your truck and lots of luck with the job search!! I need to get my a** in gear and get a job too xp Thanks ^_^ blaugh
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Posted: Sat Jun 11, 2005 3:20 pm
I'm gonna be too busy with honors junk to work during the schoolyear, so I'm probably gonna start as a bagger at the Comissary next summer.
Yay...Oo
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Posted: Sun Jun 12, 2005 5:14 am
Life's hard sometimes. As I was getting ready for bed last night I decided to flip to my livejournal and see if anyone of my friends wrote anything new... Maddie did... Not only was she kinda hurt because My entry basically said she was holding me back in the nicest of ways, but then she says she got raped... SO you can imagine how my mind was sent reeling. I called her right away and we talked. Shes taking it i guess as good as one can... She was happy to hear from me, I dunno, we talked, she mentioned that she still loves me but not as much as before, I kinda had a moment of weakness and cried just a little, I dunno, I didnt even wanna talk about us I just wanted to make sure she was ok. SO meh... the more this drags on the more I am bothered by the fact of how hard it is and for no reason. Thanks to my dear friends basically dogpiling me and making me think long and hard with reason, I calmed down, put in Fight Club and giggled til i was ready for sleep. So yeah, she flirted with a lot of guys there and found out the hard way the darker side of that. I hope she will be ok and isnt pregnant, and though I love her, I dont see us getting back together. Actually, I feel bad for how fast i got over even that striking news. I mean, I just don't know... Basically, I'm still planning to move on, I dont want someone to sort of love me. I just wish I could find a girl who would love me and pay the kind of attention to me that I would so gladly give her..
I'm So Ronery
I'm so ronery
So ronery
So ronery and sadry arone
There's no one
Just me onry
Sitting on my rittle throne
I work very hard and make up great prans
But nobody ristens, no one understands
Seems that no one takes me serirousry
And so I'm ronery
A little ronery
Poor rittre me
There's nobody
I can rerate to
Feer rike a bird in a cage
It's kinda sihry
But not rearry
Because it's fihring my body with rage
I work rearry hard and I'm physicarry fit
But nobody here seems to rearize that
When I rure the world maybe they'rr notice me
But untir then I'rr just be ronery
Rittre ronery, poor rittre me
I'm so ronery
I'm so ronery...
Hahaha Team America World Police blaugh
but seriously, I just don't know...
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Posted: Sun Jun 12, 2005 11:04 am
I'm glad to hear Maddie's taking what happened alright. Crying is not a weak thing, it takes a stronger man to let tears flow than it does to hold them back. It would be hard to have what you're going through drag on. I don't think you got over the news fast, you just weren't as worried after you found out she was ok. Everyone wants someone to fully love them and you'll find a girl that does, or she'll find you. *hugs*
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Posted: Sun Jun 12, 2005 11:47 am
~v~Lady Venom~v~ I'm glad to hear Maddie's taking what happened alright. Crying is not a weak thing, it takes a stronger man to let tears flow than it does to hold them back. It would be hard to have what you're going through drag on. I don't think you got over the news fast, you just weren't as worried after you found out she was ok. Everyone wants someone to fully love them and you'll find a girl that does, or she'll find you. *hugs* Thanks J. I fell better. I am a bit more level headed now that ive slept and eaten. Those seem to be gignatic mood changers for me. Its because i never eat much, i try to avoid feeling full ever, so sometimes i get hungry in between meals and get crabby and you already know im a crazy borderline insomniac razz Thanks again though ^___^ knowing I have people to talk to that I care about make me a lot stronger too. 3nodding
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Posted: Sun Jun 12, 2005 6:30 pm
She was...raped...? eek ............ stressed
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Posted: Sun Jun 12, 2005 6:59 pm
wow . no one deserves that kinda of s**t =
im sorry to hear about that i hope she is ok
as far as crying goes. its not weakness. it feels good to cry
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Posted: Sun Jun 12, 2005 7:07 pm
THEY SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED TO LIVE.
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Posted: Sun Jun 12, 2005 7:29 pm
Hiro Shinojii THEY SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED TO LIVE. yeah thats what i think, i feel like going there to satisfy my blood lust if for no other reason but bottom line is she pushed me away, i wasnt there because she didnt want me to be, so i couldnt do anything about it.
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Posted: Sun Jun 12, 2005 9:57 pm
Lemonlimezero Thanks J. I fell better. I am a bit more level headed now that ive slept and eaten. Those seem to be gignatic mood changers for me. Its because i never eat much, i try to avoid feeling full ever, so sometimes i get hungry in between meals and get crabby and you already know im a crazy borderline insomniac razz Thanks again though ^___^ knowing I have people to talk to that I care about make me a lot stronger too. 3nodding No problem, I'm always here to talk to (and that goes for anyone reading this). and I do know you're an insomniac razz I remember thinking that you never slept.
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Posted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 12:04 am
~v~Lady Venom~v~ Lemonlimezero Thanks J. I fell better. I am a bit more level headed now that ive slept and eaten. Those seem to be gignatic mood changers for me. Its because i never eat much, i try to avoid feeling full ever, so sometimes i get hungry in between meals and get crabby and you already know im a crazy borderline insomniac razz Thanks again though ^___^ knowing I have people to talk to that I care about make me a lot stronger too. 3nodding No problem, I'm always here to talk to (and that goes for anyone reading this). and I do know you're an insomniac razz I remember thinking that you never slept. im always thinking too much, it keeps me up at night. See right now Im up at 3am and I gotta be up at 6 for work crying heheheheh craaaaaazy!!!!
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Posted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 9:35 am
I've been thinking, and I really don't know how to react to the post. It's hard for me to put words with my emotions, but I'll try. I agree with what Hiro said. They should die... right ******** now.
Also, you definately deserve someone who loves you like woah. (That's the best way I can describe it. xp ) Don't ever settle for less. The right girl is out there somewhere.
I know how you feel about the crying thing, though... I feel weak when I cry. I've actually never let myself cry in public. But as many people have told me, crying is not a weakness... it is natural and necessary... 3nodding
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Posted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 12:10 pm
Adelleda Jubella I've been thinking, and I really don't know how to react to the post. It's hard for me to put words with my emotions, but I'll try. I agree with what Hiro said. They should die... right ******** now. Also, you definately deserve someone who loves you like woah. (That's the best way I can describe it. xp ) Don't ever settle for less. The right girl is out there somewhere. I know how you feel about the crying thing, though... I feel weak when I cry. I've actually never let myself cry in public. But as many people have told me, crying is not a weakness... it is natural and necessary... 3nodding I agree, I find myself crying and then doing something about it these days. I think the only kind of crying that is bad is that of self pity which i seldom if at all parake in. I agree that I do feel stronger after i cry because Ive greaved over it ya know? Its like once I've broken down and bawled my eyes out, I have nothing to lose as far as that situation goes.
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Posted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 12:57 pm
Lemonlimezero I agree, I find myself crying and then doing something about it these days. I think the only kind of crying that is bad is that of self pity which i seldom if at all parake in. I agree that I do feel stronger after i cry because Ive greaved over it ya know? Its like once I've broken down and bawled my eyes out, I have nothing to lose as far as that situation goes. 99% of my crying is probably self-pity, but I don't keep track. I rarely have anything actually important to mourn. Whenever I do let myself cry it tends to be a breakdown and turns into a sob-fest. I think it's because after bottling up emotion for a while it comes out like an explosion. I've always been alone during the breakdowns, so that's good. 3nodding
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Posted: Mon Jun 13, 2005 3:09 pm
Adelleda Jubella Lemonlimezero I agree, I find myself crying and then doing something about it these days. I think the only kind of crying that is bad is that of self pity which i seldom if at all parake in. I agree that I do feel stronger after i cry because Ive greaved over it ya know? Its like once I've broken down and bawled my eyes out, I have nothing to lose as far as that situation goes. 99% of my crying is probably self-pity, but I don't keep track. I rarely have anything actually important to mourn. Whenever I do let myself cry it tends to be a breakdown and turns into a sob-fest. I think it's because after bottling up emotion for a while it comes out like an explosion. I've always been alone during the breakdowns, so that's good. 3nodding
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