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 Posted: Fri May 22, 2009 10:30 pm
I think marriage is one of the only things that I wouldn't give a damn what people on the outside thought. It's not a status symbol to me, nor is it about bling or appearances or anything superficial. To me, it's always been about love and trust and a deep communicative bond. How the hell I grew up with that so firmly rooted into my beliefs, what with my parents divorce and a lot of other s**t I'd rather not get into, I'll never know. It's something that I've looked forward to growing up, and perhaps over-idealized along the way, but ******** what anyone else thinks, it's what I believe.
Of course I am not saying that anyone who believes otherwise is wrong. I'm not saying that everyone in the world is trash or unloving and that I'm some saint. I've never been one to say that my beliefs are the only way things should be. They're not. I know people perfectly happy in their relationships (or single life) that openly state they never intend to marry, and for them, it's all good.
What I'm saying is what I believe and what my viewpoint is. From that standpoint, I know that finding someone to share my life with in that respect... well, it's more than likely never going to happen. It's part of the reason I don't get close to people for too long and distance myself from time to time. **insert long-winded explanation that derails topic and puts out more information than I'd care to share**
I'm coming to terms with it. I'd rather not have to, but well, yeah.
EDIT: Also of note... I don't need to be seeing someone to find value in my life. I am not defined by whose hand I hold or who I wake up with. I am myself, and continue to be so no matter where life has taken me or will lead me until the end. I just want someone to share that journey with. Call it however you want, but it, too, is a part of who I am.
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Posted: Sat May 23, 2009 11:10 am
Is it wrong of me to suddenly feel very awkward for being engaged and getting married next year-ish? Hell, I'm thinking we should put it off a little longer on grounds of "lolz we're poor" but then I feel weird for not having a wedding date. I almost feel like people are going to think that I'm not really serious about it since I haven't known a date and we've already been engaged about a year and a half, lol. I know I shouldn't worry about what people are going to think about me, but it just also seems weird for me to not be excited and nailing down a date and place and time. I guess I'm just not in that big of a rush.
One of my good friends is getting married today. I'm still having a hard time wrapping my head around it. It's not that it's a big deal, but I guess I'm still stuck somewhere in the past where it's hard to imagine my friends being married. You know, when you're a teenager you don't really think about that stuff? I guess I'm having a hard time remembering that my friends and I are all for the most part somewhere in our 20s and that getting married is a thing that sometimes happens when you're at this age.
Let alone that I always forget in that sense that I'm gonna be married soon too -- not that I literally forget that I'm engaged/gonna get married, but I guess I just ... it's hard to explain. I guess I don't consciously think about it when I think about other people.
Two other friends of mine got married last year, one of them my age, the other a bit older (in her late 20s). Dunno why seeing my friends getting married is such a weird concept for me, especially since I'm gonna do it sometime in the future.
:U
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Posted: Sat May 23, 2009 11:23 am
There are many reasons that people get married and divorced, and many reasons that people don't want to marry at all, so I figure it's useless to lump everyone into a category.
Legally, there might not be a difference between me and my husband, and a girl who "marries" her guy friend to bring him into the country. But to fret about "the meaning of my marriage" because of that, seems to be letting status and a piece of paper define my relationship. Bottom line is, I marry because I feel in my heart that I want to.
I find that one's view of love changes quite a lot when they find someone they want to share their journey with, as Xanilus so wonderfully put it. A lot of my friends who are struggling to find first love, end up placing "true love" on a pedestal with unrealistic expectations, or they go in the opposite direction and bash love to protect themselves.
From watching my parents' amazing 20-something-year-marriage, and watching myself (since whatever the hell I'm doing seems to be working so far)... I find that your circumstances don't need to be epic for you to have epic love. The thing my parents and I both have in common is that our relationships are, for the most part, happy and mellow. I could eat a sandwich next to Ryan and feel like I'm having a good day.
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Posted: Sat May 23, 2009 12:14 pm
Waltz for Luma There are many reasons that people get married and divorced, and many reasons that people don't want to marry at all, so I figure it's useless to lump everyone into a category. Legally, there might not be a difference between me and my husband, and a girl who "marries" her guy friend to bring him into the country. But to fret about "the meaning of my marriage" because of that, seems to be letting status and a piece of paper define my relationship. Bottom line is, I marry because I feel in my heart that I want to. I find that one's view of love changes quite a lot when they find someone they want to share their journey with, as Xanilus so wonderfully put it. A lot of my friends who are struggling to find first love, end up placing "true love" on a pedestal with unrealistic expectations, or they go in the opposite direction and bash love to protect themselves. From watching my parents' amazing 20-something-year-marriage, and watching myself (since whatever the hell I'm doing seems to be working so far)... I find that your circumstances don't need to be epic for you to have epic love. The thing my parents and I both have in common is that our relationships are, for the most part, happy and mellow. I could eat a sandwich next to Ryan and feel like I'm having a good day. That is what I want. A sandwich!
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Posted: Sat May 23, 2009 11:55 pm
Aldo Waltz for Luma There are many reasons that people get married and divorced, and many reasons that people don't want to marry at all, so I figure it's useless to lump everyone into a category. Legally, there might not be a difference between me and my husband, and a girl who "marries" her guy friend to bring him into the country. But to fret about "the meaning of my marriage" because of that, seems to be letting status and a piece of paper define my relationship. Bottom line is, I marry because I feel in my heart that I want to. I find that one's view of love changes quite a lot when they find someone they want to share their journey with, as Xanilus so wonderfully put it. A lot of my friends who are struggling to find first love, end up placing "true love" on a pedestal with unrealistic expectations, or they go in the opposite direction and bash love to protect themselves. From watching my parents' amazing 20-something-year-marriage, and watching myself (since whatever the hell I'm doing seems to be working so far)... I find that your circumstances don't need to be epic for you to have epic love. The thing my parents and I both have in common is that our relationships are, for the most part, happy and mellow. I could eat a sandwich next to Ryan and feel like I'm having a good day. That is what I want. A sandwich! IAWTC! ... *skulks into the kitchen* emo
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Posted: Sun May 24, 2009 1:32 pm
Guys, I got a picture with ***** yesterday at Fanime. xd
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Posted: Sun May 24, 2009 2:27 pm
You should give it to L0cke during one of the Gaia events. :XP:
I wish I could go to a con. Make sure to show us the "exclusive item" okay? *coughwhatbullshitcough*
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Posted: Sun May 24, 2009 3:29 pm
Waltz for Luma I could eat a sandwich next to Ryan and feel like I'm having a good day.
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Posted: Sun May 24, 2009 11:46 pm
The wedding I went to on Saturday was AWESOME - they introduced the wedding party to the Indiana Jones theme and the bride and groom to the Imperial Death March, and then the couple had a swordfight with Sheriff Lawful, and we were all jumping rope at the reception, and rather than a garter Nicole had a Frisbee up her dress. Best. Wedding. Ever.
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Posted: Mon May 25, 2009 12:16 am
That sounds a lot cooler than the wedding I went to on saturday, where I got mildly sunburned, ignored by most people, and felt awkward around a bunch of strangers. WOOO! Nothing like picking out a new shirt in the exact color as the main wedding color by coincidence. >w<
And I wish there was a con closer to me that Gaia would go to. Sorry, I can't make it to California, and I certainly can't afford to go to Otakon again -- I have rent now. I was fortunate to escape to Otakon a few years ago when my dad just received a buncha money and was willing to help me out, and I was still living with my mom and didn't have rent to pay. emo
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Posted: Mon May 25, 2009 2:44 pm
I am married, happily to the same man.. for many years.. I know its not for everyone with use we compliment each other ...Like cant do Math very well, He doesnt spell well. We work work well as a team on projects on the house I help prep the walls and he paints.. He respects me, makes me laugh, and we trust each other.. I know probably step on someone toes but I dont think a couple who is married has to be of a different sex.. I have seen love in people eyes who are of the same sex and deep, love , care and respect for each other.. I also respect those who choose to live together and not marry.. I lived with my husband for 2 years before we got married, but we both lived with our parents till we moved in together and I think it was important for us to learn first about each other. Living with someone shows a different side of each other.. The side you never see..
I also respect people who dont want to get married.. You have to do what is right for you , your moral values..
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Posted: Mon May 25, 2009 4:42 pm
Lady Pyre You should give it to L0cke during one of the Gaia events. :XP: I wish I could go to a con. Make sure to show us the "exclusive item" okay? *coughwhatbullshitcough* I couldn't get a badge because I'm poor as dirt, so I couldn't go to the panel. sweatdrop They didn't have their big booth this year. confused I wonder if with all these cons they're trying to go to they're forgetting where they started in the first place.
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Posted: Tue May 26, 2009 1:10 am
eek Wow, I actually got an A for ASL instead of B- like I was told last week. Way cool!! cool heart
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Posted: Tue May 26, 2009 11:33 am
ladyshari I am married, happily to the same man.. for many years.. I know its not for everyone with use we compliment each other ...Like cant do Math very well, He doesnt spell well. We work work well as a team on projects on the house I help prep the walls and he paints.. He respects me, makes me laugh, and we trust each other.. I know probably step on someone toes but I dont think a couple who is married has to be of a different sex.. I have seen love in people eyes who are of the same sex and deep, love , care and respect for each other.. I also respect those who choose to live together and not marry.. I lived with my husband for 2 years before we got married, but we both lived with our parents till we moved in together and I think it was important for us to learn first about each other. Living with someone shows a different side of each other.. The side you never see.. I also respect people who dont want to get married.. You have to do what is right for you , your moral values.. Your sig is too big, could you please change it to something below 100kb?
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Posted: Tue May 26, 2009 11:48 am
Aldo ladyshari I am married, happily to the same man.. for many years.. I know its not for everyone with use we compliment each other ...Like cant do Math very well, He doesnt spell well. We work work well as a team on projects on the house I help prep the walls and he paints.. He respects me, makes me laugh, and we trust each other.. I know probably step on someone toes but I dont think a couple who is married has to be of a different sex.. I have seen love in people eyes who are of the same sex and deep, love , care and respect for each other.. I also respect those who choose to live together and not marry.. I lived with my husband for 2 years before we got married, but we both lived with our parents till we moved in together and I think it was important for us to learn first about each other. Living with someone shows a different side of each other.. The side you never see.. I also respect people who dont want to get married.. You have to do what is right for you , your moral values.. Your sig is too big, could you please change it to something below 100kb? Don't mind him, Shari. He went after me too, for images that weren't even in my signature. xD
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