Welcome to Gaia! ::

Zexion chuckled and smiled, wrapping his arms around Roxas tightly. "Mm, you're right. This is the best part of dating someone," he mumbled happily. He let a deep breath go and hummed in agreement. "Okay...let me set an alarm for us, okay?" He said softly and grabbed his phone from his lap. He set an alarm for an hour then set it on the end table before curling back up to Roxas. "Sweet sleep, Gorgeous," he mumbled and kissed the top of his head and relaxed, smile covering his lips.

Axel watched Riku walk away then sighed, running his fingers through his hair. He leaned over and rested his head on Demyx's shoulder. "I'm doing the right thing, making him go see Sora, right?" He asked softly.

Axel nodded to Demyx's words of encouragement, closing his eyes briefly to relax in the blond's arms. "What would I do without you?" he mumbled and sat up fully, looking over at him with a smile. He reached forward and ran his fingers along Demyx's cheekbone before cupping his face and leaning in to kiss him with a hum. "We'll work it out. We won't lose anyone, and everything will turn out at least partially okay," he said with reassurance. "And look at you. You're even healing up nicely. Pretty soon, after everything calms down a little, we'll be able to maybe have a little fun in the bedroom again," he told him flirtatiously and leaned forward to kiss him gently again. Then he pulled back with a big smile and stood. "Want some breakfast?" he asked, walking to the fridge.

Around an hour later, Sora slowly woke up. His eyes fluttered open and immediately stared blankly at the ceiling. So today was the day... he rolled his head to the side to look at the empty pillow beside him, and he sighed softly. He shouldn't have expected any less. Riku was upset with him, because he made a stupid rash decision and ended one of the best things to ever happen to him. No one would tell him where Riku was or what he was doing, and he hadn't heard from or really about him since the day he walked out of the door. Just thinking about it should have made his heart more heavy, but that was impossible. He was already as depressed as he could get. He couldn't even cry anymore, he was so far gone.

He laid in bed for a little longer, completely zoning out the world around him as he stared at the ceiling, unfeeling and unthinking. The distant sound of Zexion's alarm going off brought him out of the daze long enough for him to pull what little of himself was left together and sit up, slipping out of the bed slowly. His stomach, among the rest of his body, felt empty, but he didn't have an appetite. He had a fast metabolism, too, so he was just steady losing weight as the days went by. He walked over to his bag and bent down, pulling a pair of pants and underwear out of it. He frowned as he realized there was no shirts left of his that were clean, and gave a soft sigh as he turned to Riku's closet. What little was left in it, there were some T-shirts among the clothes hanging there. So he shuffled through them and pulled a black shirt with swirling piano keys covering the front out and laid it on the bed beside his clothes. Silently, he made his way out of Riku's bedroom and into the bathroom, closing the door slowly. it was almost like he was a ghost, barely existing and not making a sound.

Zexion groaned as his alarm went off and reached over, quickly turning it off. "Mm...baby, time to get up," he mumbled, snuggling up to Roxas, not wanting to get up himself. He was just about to doze back off when he heard the click of a door opening and then another click of one closing. The muffled sound of the shower running hit his ears, then, and he groaned again. "Rox, Sora's up," he mumbled, sitting up straight and stretching his arms above his head to pop his back and exercise his stiff muscles. Then he casually laid his one arm over Roxas's shoulders. "I think he's in the shower," he yawned, rubbing one of his eyes to try and coax himself into a more awake state.

"Oh, good idea," Axel told Demyx as he mentioned Riku's favorite breakfast meal. He set to work cooking it up, and smiled as he felt eyes following him around the kitchen. He stretched his arms above his head as he popped his back then put the bacon in a pan to fry. He turned and leaned back against the counter, smirking over at Demyx as he let the bacon cook. "Whatchya lookin' at, Dem?" he flirted before pushing himself away from the counter and sauntering over to him. He carefully took the cup of coffee from Demyx's hand and set it down on the table before dipping down to smash his lips against the blond's. He hummed in happiness as he cupped Demyx's jaw in his palm, soaking into the kiss. "I love you," he whispered against Demyx's mouth and pulled back slowly with a loving smile.

Zexion sighed softly when Roxas asked him if he was ready for meeting this other victim today. He slid his arm around his shoulders and pulled him into a light embrace. "Roxas, I don't think you guys will ever be ready for this, and this other guy is probably feeling the same way right now. However, I also think that you need to get over this hump, and you may feel a little better about the whole situation. I'm not saying any of this is right, because it absolutely is not. If I ever see the guy, I might shoot his knee caps out and drag him to the police station, to be honest. I'm just saying that maybe if you're able to talk about it to someone who knows at least partially what you're going through, you may not feel so detached from everyone, including me, that tries to talk to you about it," he explained to him and kissed the top of his head.

Axel groaned a little as Demyx pulled him back in for another kiss. They hadn't had sex or done really anything dirty in a while, and it was starting to get to him. So he cupped Demyx's face with both hands and pressed himself more into the kiss, lingering just a bit before forcing himself away. He took a step back and panted, laughing a little at the flustered look on Demyx's face. "Not now, Dem. You have to wait, young man," he teased and turned back to breakfast, flipping the bacon and starting up the scrambled eggs.

Zexion shook his head at Roxas's question. "No, I didn't. I hope for Sora's sake that he will be, though. And I hope for both of their sakes that Sora's not too far gone. He doesn't really seem to be here lately, and I'm scared he's closed himself off to everyone completely. I hope seeing Riku will snap him out of this funk that he's been in. I mean, I know Riku's not really in a much better condition, but Riku's not used to showing his emotions anyway. Sora seems like he's a very open person about his emotions, and lately...he just seems to be drifting. I don't think I've seen him smile since Riku left," Zexion said sadly as he shot Demyx a text asking if they had gotten any progress with getting Riku to agree to come to the station with them.

When Roxas spoke up about food, Zexion looked up from his phone. "Yeah, we can stop somewhere. You may have to coax Sora into actually eating something, though. He hasn't eaten much since everything went down the drain, and he's been dropping weight like crazy. Not like he was even very fatty to begin with, but now..." He sighed softly

Axel exchanged glances with Demyx and took in a deep breath before quickly assembling Riku's breakfast and setting it down in front of him. "Eat up, Buddy. You could use the protein. You can puke it back up on me later in payback if it gets too much out there, alright?" he told his friend with an encouraging smile. Then he turned back to the stove and started putting Demyx's together as well.

Zexion frowned as he listened to Roxas spill his worries out to him. He moved to walk over to him before Roxas said he was going to go talk to Sora. "Good luck, Rox," he called quietly, frown on his lips.

He sighed softly and glanced at his phone as he heard it buzz. He let out an even heavier sigh and frowned deeper as he read the message. He and Sora will be a matching pair, then. I'm really worried about Sora. It's like he can't take care of himself, and won't let either me or Rox help. It's really upsetting Rox, because he feels useless when it comes to protecting him.

Sora barely even remembered the shower. He just hoped he actually cleaned himself up well enough. In that shower is where he broke up with Riku during that stupid terrible day. How could he? How could he do something like that to Riku? His idle? His...boyfriend. Sora's blue eyes dulled more at that thought as he stared into the mirror at himself. Ex-boyfriend. Here was where he should tear up. Cry. Sob. Whimper. He just stared at himself, taking in th empty look in his eyes. Silently, he sighed and picked up his towel, wrapping it around himself and holding it there. He quietly unlocked the door and stepped out of the barely-steamy room. As he stepped out, he didn't even notice Roxas advancing down the hall, and turned into Riku's room, quietly shutting the door behind him. He moved to the bed silently and wiped his body down with the towel before beginning to pull on the clothes, starting with underwear, then moving to pants and belt, and finally pulling the shirt on. Riku's shirt. He grabbed the hem of the shirt and looked down at his front before stretching the collar up over his face and breathing in deeply. He felt his knees buckle at the scent, and the bed caught him as he toppled backwards onto it. He sat up and breathed in the scent again as he lifted the cloth over his face. On the third breath, he finally felt tears resurfacing, silently sliding down his cheeks.

He couldn't do this. He couldn't do this without Riku. He had Roxas, sure, but Roxas had Zexion. Sora...Sora wanted someone to hold him like a lover. He wanted Riku to hold him like a lover, but he ruined any chance of that. He sent them sliding down the drain with one stupid mistake. Stupid mistake. Stupid Sora.

Sora looked up as Roxas began to speak. His eyes shone with tears as he took in quick little breaths to steady his crying. "I have to do this," he whispered, voice strained. "How am I gonna move on if I don't do anything about it?" At the mention of Riku's name, Sora let out one loud sob and hunched into himself once more.

"I'm so stupid," he whispered, suddenly harsh. "How could I have let him go? Pushed him away?" he asked seemingly no one as he stared forward blindly. "That's all I keep doing is pushing people away. Since you left...that's all I've been able to do. I have no one left. No one except you, but... You'll always be there. I know you will. And you're the most important, but...it'd be nice to know someone outside of my family cares about me like I am family," he told him in a watery voice, choking back small sobs he thought were long gone. "And you...you have Zexion. He cares so much about you... Riku...he cared about me, too..," he whispered, tears finally stopped, and he was back to that empty expression.

"But I ******** it all up. Just like I always do..," he whispered eerily as he stared forward at the wall. "Now all I am is a pathetic excuse for a human being, sleeping in his bed, wearing his clothes, bathing in that god-forsaken shower where this all started... I'm a joke," he continued whispering, gaze slowly sliding down to the floor. "I drove him away when I needed him most, and now look at me... I won't even let you get close to me. Who am I? I can't be Sora... Sora's supposed to always be happy," he said solomnly and looked up at Roxas, deadened stare boring into his twin's eyes. "Who am I, Roxas..?" He seemed perfectly calm about it, but there was a pleading in his voice for Roxas to give him an answer. "What am I? ...Monster. I'm a monster..." he went back to whispering, gaze sliding back to the floor as he began muttering under his breath.

"I already feel like I'm dying," Sora whispered when Roxas said he was going to kill himself. He listened to what Roxas was saying but continued to look down at the floor until Roxas knelt in front of him. He slowly looked up into his eyes, and felt his heart tighten at Roxas's expression. He was crying for Sora. Because Sora was hurting. Because Roxas couldn't help him.

Sora's eyes widened as soon as he heard Riku was going through a drug relapse. He fell completely silent, tears slipping down his cheeks as he took in this information. "What..?" Oh, God, he really did ******** up. He ******** up big time. Why had no one told him? Why was everyone keeping secrets from him? Why was Roxas the only one that understood that Sora didn't like lies? He was an open person, and liked for everyone else to trust him enough to be open back.

"Why did no one tell me?" he practically whimpered. "How long has this been happening? Since he left?" he asked, voice turning hysterical and slightly angry. "And no one told me?!" he demanded. "No one told me he was in that much pain? Just left me out of it?! I may have ******** up and broken up with him, but I still love him! I need to know s**t like this!" he practically screamed in Roxas's face. As soon as he paused to take a breath and looked at Roxas's expression, he went silent and fell down into Roxas's arms. "I'm sorry," he whispered, hugging him tightly. "I didn't mean... I wasn't... I wasn't yelling at you, I just..." Softly, he began sobbing once more, burying his face in Roxas's shoulder. "There's just so much going on, and...and I really miss Riku," he whispered and gave a watery sigh as he sniffled. "I know we weren't together super long, but... I know he's special, and I just let him go like that...shoved him away. I just... Every time I go to sleep at night, I think of him. When I wake up, I immediately look over and hope he's laying beside me...but I've learned to not hope for it anymore. I look over now to make sure the nightmare's continuing, not to make sure it's over," he admitted to his brother softly.

Sora listened to Roxas speak quietly. Eventually he lifted his head and looked up at Roxas in the eyes. "I'll try," he whispered softly. "I know I have to do this, it's just...hard because there's so much negativity running through me right now... The only things keeping me wanting to go through with this are the fact that maybe I can help someone else through this, and that it might help you get over it, too. At least a little," he told his brother quietly.

He leaned forward and hugged him once more. "I don't know exactly what happened to you there, but I want to help you however I can, just like you want to help me. I want to see you really happy again," he whispered to him and pulled back with a little smile. "So will you try to get better with me? So we can both be happy again?" he asked him, looking into his eyes hopefully.