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Slick Southpaw

Feral Faun

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Posted: Wed Sep 03, 2008 7:24 pm

ÉN verekszik részére Isten , országom és családom

to be honest, this whole "separation of genders" thing doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me.

>.> i find the whole concept that "zomg! you see them and talk to them and you're not related" is utter bs in my opinion. talking to another guy who is not related to you, doesn't work with do, doesn't go to school with you is not going to get an unplanned pregnancy or the whole other slew of problems people make up.

i've just accepted it as a weird cultural thing that's still stuck the 12th century.

People talk about unifying Muslims...how are you guys ever going to unify if you can't even sit in the same room with the opposite gender of any status?
Islam is not just for Muslim men, it's not just for women, it's for both. why don't you guys act like it?

i apologize if I seem rude, that's not my intention. I'm putting it in blunt terms from a westerner's perspective.

...kit ugye verekszik részére?

Posted: Sat Sep 06, 2008 4:58 pm

I don't think it's that you stay separated all the time, I mean at the masjid and all the parties we have, no one really stays separated at all. And everyone talks to everyone (which is totally ok). It's just that a girl and a guy can't be alone together unless they're family. And besides, how can we get married if we're separated all the time, so yeah. It's pretty confusing I guess.

-Xo-KrazeeWierdo-oX-

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Pheonixia

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Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 12:00 am

squinty1989

tassan

squinty1989

The reason I didn't marry her is because simply... I CAN'T!

Since I am studying and I now her family as well as mine will say I need to be able to support her spiritually and financially..

And I can't do the "Financial" part...

then you need to wait till you are financially ready??

what are your ages?

I am 18 going 19 and she is 17 going 18...
We are crazy about each other.
And I know I sound crazy..
But love sucks when you miss the other so much....

I want to be there for her and support her

Ah.......I'm answering way way late.......but I hope my opinion is actually read.

It would be a waste....if you love each other and your parents don't know.

The best method I would prescribe.......is that you get engaged to her. Then at least the parents involved would know your feelings.

After you are engaged with her........everything else will become a lot easier. Then you can study..and support her after marriage when you are ready.

Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 12:15 am

Ratri_Cat

ÉN verekszik részére Isten , országom és családom

to be honest, this whole "separation of genders" thing doesn't make a whole lot of sense to me.

>.> i find the whole concept that "zomg! you see them and talk to them and you're not related" is utter bs in my opinion. talking to another guy who is not related to you, doesn't work with do, doesn't go to school with you is not going to get an unplanned pregnancy or the whole other slew of problems people make up.

i've just accepted it as a weird cultural thing that's still stuck the 12th century.

People talk about unifying Muslims...how are you guys ever going to unify if you can't even sit in the same room with the opposite gender of any status?
Islam is not just for Muslim men, it's not just for women, it's for both. why don't you guys act like it?

i apologize if I seem rude, that's not my intention. I'm putting it in blunt terms from a westerner's perspective.

...kit ugye verekszik részére?

Separations of genders is good to a certain extent.

I know many things are cultural bias'.....but when you think of Islamic philosophy with an open mind you will get the image.

Firstly, I'd like to mention that I was raised up in Canada.....so Islamic country culture does not affect my way of thinking.

No one says, that you cannot speak to you peers or co-workers....that is unavoidable. There are some things you should keep in mind though:

1) Even if you have friends/acquaintances that are the opposite gender, it is better not to be seen out of class or work with them. This is for a number of reasons. a) If two people of the opposite gender are seen together....by a religious community member...then you do not know what that community member will say to others in the form of gossip; b) if you are seen outside with the opposite gender by a religious community member then because of the gossiping after wards your marriage relationships will become worse (especially if you are planning to go through an engaged marriage); c)if you are married, and still, decide to have female friends....this will effect your marriage to a very large extent....as people are not as trusting as they seem to be..and since you are always (or sometimes) going around with females they will have doubt in your sincerity; and d) if you are a female and you are seen with a guy........then expect to get a lot of bad rumors started about you

(I know all this is sad...but this is how the world works)

So.......it has nothing to do with issues about lust.....to some extent.
Why to some extent? Because some people you may trust may decide to use you....though it is usually not the case.

Why are males and females segregated during religious events?

Prayers/Religious Programs: A female asked this questions to my Khalifa....and his reply was "Thank God.....we are segregated! Because if we were not then the majority of male attention would be towards the females...and not towards God."

I hope that helped!

Pheonixia

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Pheonixia

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Posted: Sun Sep 07, 2008 12:16 am

-Xo-KrazeeWierdo-oX-

I don't think it's that you stay separated all the time, I mean at the masjid and all the parties we have, no one really stays separated at all. And everyone talks to everyone (which is totally ok). It's just that a girl and a guy can't be alone together unless they're family. And besides, how can we get married if we're separated all the time, so yeah. It's pretty confusing I guess.

Islam believes in arranged marriages (with the male and female choice of course). But, love marriages are allowed as well. Love marriages usually only occur between cousins though.

Posted: Wed Sep 10, 2008 3:41 am

Pheonixia

squinty1989

tassan

squinty1989

The reason I didn't marry her is because simply... I CAN'T!

Since I am studying and I now her family as well as mine will say I need to be able to support her spiritually and financially..

And I can't do the "Financial" part...

then you need to wait till you are financially ready??

what are your ages?

I am 18 going 19 and she is 17 going 18...
We are crazy about each other.
And I know I sound crazy..
But love sucks when you miss the other so much....

I want to be there for her and support her

Ah.......I'm answering way way late.......but I hope my opinion is actually read.

It would be a waste....if you love each other and your parents don't know.

The best method I would prescribe.......is that you get engaged to her. Then at least the parents involved would know your feelings.

After you are engaged with her........everything else will become a lot easier. Then you can study..and support her after marriage when you are ready.

What you said is like what everyone tells me! razz

squinty1989

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