Welcome to Gaia! ::

Well, I had a very shitty day today. Most of it I spent in the park studying, but not because I'm a good student like that sweatdrop rather to get away from my family.

Little preface: My dad basically dumped my mom when I was 8 and my sister was 5. For the past 7ish years, I've been living with my mom in New Orleans and my sister has been living with our dad in Buffalo. Thanks to Katrina, I'm staying with my dad and my mom is staying in a hotel (which is luckily paid for by FEMA).

Well, I'll cut to the chase. Me, my mom and my sister were at my dad's house, he was at work. Out of a little argument that escalated into my sister hitting herself, in what I can only describe as a fit of frighteningly gleeful rage, my sister told me that when I was 2, my dad attempted to kill me by holding me underwater because I splashed him when we were in a pool. My mom had apparently told her this.

When I was little, I had a fear of water, specifically, being underwater. I had no idea there was a reason for this.

With my sister "laughing" at me, I quickly grabbed my books, put on my shoes, and walked out, trying not to cry.

It was bad enough not hearing my mom not contradict her. It was worse coming home hours later and having my dad 1. let me know that he knew what my sister told me, and 2. not deny it.

After a lot of silence, my dad asked me (not unkindly) if I had anything to say. I managed to choke out, "Why can't you people just kill yourselves and leave me alone?"
My dad's chilling answer was, "Well, I've considered it...guess I'm just gutless, is all."

I still haven't spoken to my sister or my mom. After crying for a few hours, I had a long talk with my dad, about my whole family's problems, which go back to his alcoholic grandparents (and probably further). To my mom's alcoholic father who abused half his kids and was nice to the others, my mom included, for no discernible reason. I already described my sister hitting herself, and I think she's cut herself too. She'll occasionally just fly into these rages where she talks about how she should die and how everyone hates her. She's had one boyfriend after another treat her badly and she makes excuses for them. They haven't been physically abusive, as far as we know--if they were my dad and I would break their knees.

Well...I guess I'm trying to figure out what's wrong with her. She's tried a few SSRIs and they've done little if anything. I'm starting to think she might need lithium, but she doesn't seem to have bipolar disorder. My mom's been diagnosed with bipolar, but she's been on Zoloft and that's helped her a LOT. My diagnoses have been depression and panic disorder--Zoloft helped me too and Prozac was even better. Go figure...

Any suggestions or whatnot is appreciated!

I'd definitely suggest sending your sister at least to therapy. Maybe some family therapy would be helpful, too?