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I get on here and complain and complain about myself and it's starting to get really annoying. I can remember my freshman and sophomore years of highschool. I had no friends and everything was s**t, but I still got out of bed with a smile on my face everyday and made my way through life as though nothing could faise me. No one knew who I was, everyone hated me, and no one wanted anything to do with me. Sad how I get into highschool and all my past friends ditch me and yet no one new will accept me. And people ask me why I don't try making friends. Get into a situation like me where you have no friends to begin with and no one will accept you no matter how hard you try, and you'll realize why I've given up on trying to make any friends.

Anyways, along the road since then something shattered. My happiness was ruined and I began to complain about every little thing. Eventually I fixed that, and then it crept up again. Recently I got it to where I'm happy 24/7 again, but now my depression is slowly settling back in. AND I'M TIRED OF THE BULLSHIT!!! Nothing in my life is ever going to change, so I'm damn well going to get out of bed with a smile on my face everyday. I'll be depressed when I'm home, but that's in my own little sanctuary. From now on I'm never leaving my house with depression on my face, I'm never logging in with an agenda to b***h, and I'm certainly never letting anyone bring me down EVER AGAIN!!!

I've learned something the past month. If you force yourself to be completely happy, eventually that little mask you put on to make yourself that way will mold into your skin. It's just like the story we were told at retreat. It's too long to add to this already huge comment, but it basically is just as my last sentance stated. I may have been faking the happiness, but I put so much of myself into that happiness that eventually I didn't have to fake it anymore. Bloody hell, I was putting a hop into every step I took even if nothing good would come out of life. Now if you'll excuse me, I'mma check on the rp I'm playing and then I'mma go play my game. Gonna make me a rainbow! blaugh

Its not worth living your life sad and depressed. It is always good to try to make the best out of any situation. And don't worry about other people sooner or later you will find a true friend when you least expect it. Just live your life and try to make it as best as possible. And I love that you see that you should wake up with a smile. AI think that a smile can actually give you a better day.

Yay! be happy!! smile
life too short to be depressed.
smile

When you feel like your wearing a mask thats when I get into the 'who am I' delema.

When I get depressed I tend to try and figure out who I am.. and then I get more depressed and realize I dont know who I am, or what I want, need and desire. I kinda learned that, Doesn't matter because what I want Need and desire will eventually cross my path, so I wont spend time worrying about that. Life is constantly changing, so we slowly change in order to survive. Not a complete change, but never the less we change as much as we stay the same. So Tomorrow I may be different, or at least have a different perspective on things. I have faith, that Things will always work out eventually. Sad days turn to happy days, happy days turn to managable days.

And As I always say, You can NOT respect the good without the bad. just like you have to struggle for a dream.

3nodding I know you will figure yourself out, and much of what anyone says wont really sink in. But try and let the fact that people many people are trying to say something. Something just for you, to cheer you up..

I understand completly, I was talking to my Dr Lady, and she said I dont know how to interpret my emotions. Like if Im feeling Angry, I just say Im angry, but cant explain why, or what Im thinking that makes me angry. It can be very hard, but there is something you can do about it. You have to be modivated and want to help yourself.

Look up Dialectical Behavior Therapy (Marsha Linehan Is the guru of it)

This will help you understand your emotions a little better. Theres no shame in being ill, you dont choose to be Mentally unwell, just like any other sickness.

Just take a deep breath and realize you will learn how to cope with your emotions, dont be afraid and run from them. Just learn what they are and how the affect you and those around you ^_^

And my avi? I didnt do nuffin!

You should go super saiyan.

Actually, the hardest thing about depression is the fact that the only person that has control over it is yourself. There are ways to deal with it as well... meds, distractions, activities, people, etc...

Most people get depressed here and there for various reasons, and it's normal to get upset, here and there.

Just don't go turning yourself into zombie.
You know what works best when you're depressed?

Go find outside, find some people you don't know, and do something strange. Like walk on your hands, or skip through the mall like a little kid. Or find a job, and play around at work while helping the customers. I play around with my patients.

Hell yeah you could swing from the trees!

arrow Comic books would be written about you
arrow movie/documentary offers would start rolling in

You would possibly never have to work again!