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Hi! I haven't posted here in ******** FOREVER! XD

Ok, so this thread... I won't lie, it's more "advice" than "discussion." If that doesn't bother you, read on...

Three years. Three. ********. Years. I was with a beautiful, intelligent, talented, amazing girl named Vanessa for three years of my life. For some, that's worthy of applause due to our ages - while others have been together for much, MUCH longer. Personally, I felt pretty good about it, no one I knew had been together that long, y'know? I promised my virginity to this girl, and she did the same to me. It was a long distance relationship, and she was heavily religious, so obviously we wanted to wait. I was fine with that, because I felt like I would be with this girl for the rest of my life.

Flash back to about four weeks ago. I get an email... Oh, it's from Vanessa! I can't wait to see what my gorgeous little angel has to say! "Mikey, you know I love, right...?" Of course! We say it to each other everyday! "But... You also know that we met when I was really young, don't you...?" Uh-huh, she was fourteen, just turned fourteen actually, and I was fifteen. "My parents were super strict back then, I hadn't had a chance to really know what it was like to be a teenager..." Poor thing, right? "But then I met you, and things just felt unreal. I was truly in love." Awww, that's my Vanessa! "I guess what I'm saying is... I'm seventeen now, nearly an adult... You ARE an adult... Ever since I've been a teenager, I've either been under my parents' control or dating you... I never had a chance to experience this stage of my life..." Wait... "I don't wanna say the whole 'I wanna break up' thing, but I guess that's what I'm saying... I'm sorry, I want a chance to actually live like a teenager for once, and as long as I have to worry about who I'll be with in thirty years, I just can't do that... I'm sorry, Michael, I do love you, but I don't LOVE you that way, at least not anymore, but it isn't your fault... I'm sorry..." What...? FUUUUUUUCK! crying

That's right, my friends! Three years of my life wasted! But wait, there's more! My grandpa has six months to live. My grades are falling like crazy right before graduation. I can't find a job. My parents are insanely angry with me all the time for no reason. There are thirteen year olds taunting me for being a virgin. My Wii won't read disks. My friends are quitting school one-by-one. My mom's trying to sell my pet Schnauzer. My copy of Dead Space ******** up. (Minor, but that game made me feel better when I'm in a slump) Just random bullshit that's driving me insane.

Quite frankly, I'm dead inside and wanna ******** anything with legs. Well, that isn't true... See, I couldn't even come close to having sex with someone unless I absolutely loved them, be that in a romantic way or simply as a very close friend. The problem? No one I love, or anyone for that matter, would want me. Well, that isn't a problem, is it? But you get the idea.

But then, out of nowhere, one of my very best friends, Katie, says to me "y'know, I've always wanted you, but you seemed like you would always be with Vanessa so I gave up." Woohoo! I'm wanted! That's great! ...Right? Not exactly. She said she would have sex with me if I can get as close to her as her ex and current ******** of sorts, Chelsea, who is also one my closest friends. (Ok, they just mess around, not actually do it) I'd be lying if I said I didn't want it. Right now, I just feel like simply being with someone I love in this way would make me forget about all the s**t that's been going on.

But... On the flip-side... Do I REALLY want it? Have I fallen this far? Should I resist the temptation and keep my virtue despite having no real religious or moral reasons to keep my virginity anymore? I know Katie and I would never date, we simply aren't compatible that way, so she isn't "the one" or anything. Should I wait for THE perfect girl? Or have I lost my one chance with the girl of my dreams already? What do you do in a situation that makes you want sex more than anything?

My advice to you is to keep your virginity, Value it. Wait for that perfect girl to share it with, dont just give it up to anyone. What helps me is I think about "the one" for me, and being able to marry him knowing Im completely pure. That I waited for him and didnt give it up. Maybe it can help you too.

Im sorry all these bad things are happening to you, I'll pray for you! ^_^

Well... Thanks for the advice, everyone, but it's unnecessary now.

Katie and Chelsea got really mad at me earlier for reasons that are still a mystery to me. To quickly turn the tables in my favor, I gave a speech about how they should get back together, because they obviously still love each other and won't be happy unless they're dating. So they got back together and went home to... Y'know. So I'm both happy for them, and extremely sad. In the end, I feel worse than before but I lost my chance to lose my virginity, which may be a blessing in disguise, I dunno. This month sucks c**k.

I know you're upset but I think its perhaps a bit inaccurate to say 3 years of your life wasted, I mean you were happy while you were with her, right? It will take awhile but your thoughts will settle down you'll be grateful for all the happy times you spent with her.

i agree with this,
i think all relationships help you grow in some way or they teach you something about people anout love or anything really.
i dont think you're actually desperate for sex, i think you just crave intimacy with someone, you dont say if you met her often or not, but im guessin you didnt, so your probs feeling cheated that you never got to experiance that with her, and thats normal, but that doesnt mean you should rush out an shag the first thing with legs.
also with all the other crap you've got goin on, you're gunna feel pretty low an crave affection an love an you may just be mistakin that for a need for sex.
im sorry to hear about your grandad, my heart goes out to you.
perhaps you'd feel better if you spoke to someone? like a close friend or catch one of ur parents when they're in a good mood an explain how you feel, sometimes just talkin about things makes you feel better, which i guess is what you did here, and its good your not bottling things up.
we're always here when u wanna talk to someone.
i hope that helped, it probs didnt, i suck at advice sweatdrop

Don't destroy who you are because of this girl. She broke your heart, at least she was straight-up honest with you. I'm sure the decision to say what she said didn't come lightly or as a spur-of-the-moment decision, so try not to take it so hard.

Those three years of your life weren't WASTED at all, especially if you have fond memories of the two of you. One of my best friends stopped speaking to me one day out of the blue and never approached me about why she'd suddenly given me the cold shoulder and our friendship died. Two or three years later, she told me she was angry at me for something that could've easily been fixed, had she come and talked to me about it. I was best friends with her for three years and, even though I haven't accepted her back as a friend, I still look back on all the fun times we had in the past.

I guess what I'm saying is that you will get over it. Don't do anything you'll later regret. Take a cold shower and try to forget those feelings you're having right now. Reevaluate how you're feeling in a few months and then make a decision based on THOSE feelings, not rebound feelings.

Good luck!