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 Posted: Mon Sep 07, 2009 6:32 am
My fiance's grandfather is dying. He is not going to be returned to the Hospital near his home. He is staying in a hospital about an hour away from home and 2 and a half hours away from his whole family. He has had mini strokes. Right now he is eating through a feeding tube as he can't swallow. So I'm doing my best to prepare for his death.
How do you prepare for death?
I'm going to be doing an ancestral prayer this afternoon, to ask them to help him and help us.
What does your path say about death and dying?
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Posted: Mon Sep 07, 2009 6:51 am
I would begin by making prayers to my ancestors and my Gods.
I might also make sachets for protection and love and give them to my family and to the person who is dying.
I'd also want to clean. Things feel better to me when I clean.
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Posted: Mon Sep 07, 2009 7:14 am
Well my fiance's Grandfather is Christian, so I don't feel comfortable praying to my Gods for him. I do however feel comfortable praying to my ancestors as well as his ancestors.
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Posted: Mon Sep 07, 2009 7:48 am
I agree with praying to ancestors to assist him in crossing over. Death is just a transition into the astral, though it can be a tough one if the soul isn't ready to let go of the physical.
Building an ancestor altar is a great way to cope with death. You can give them offerings, use it to talk to them in meditation and it keeps a memory of them alive in your home.
When they pass you can cook a dinner (like after the wake), maybe their favorite meal, and have everyone tell their favorite memory of the deceased. By keeping their memory alive and celebrating their life you can ease the grieving process. Maybe make it an annual thing like at major holidays until the pain goes away.
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Posted: Mon Sep 07, 2009 8:25 am
I actually had an ancestral altar at one point. I plan on setting it up again either today or tomorrow. I plan on keeping it up till we know more about whats going on. Death is hard for all involved. I don't know my fiance's Grandfather very well, but I do still care for him greatly. Having lost a grandparent and having seen them dying I think I can handle things a bit better than my fiance'. Still...It helps.
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Posted: Tue Sep 22, 2009 10:29 am
I have to say for me Death is something that hits me hard.
I normily try to spend as much time with the person that I can.
But after they die I don't tend to deal with it well. I become very icolated or just bottle everything up and don't let it upset me till I explode.
That said when my dog died, she had been with me her whole life, I never really felt anything until I woke up to her spirt sitting on my bed.
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Posted: Tue Sep 22, 2009 11:54 am
Death will happen to everything that lives eventually. It's one of the worst parts of living, especially since it's something you know is coming, you just don't know when it'll strike.
I suppose my path embraces it along with life. You have to eventually accept it. I mean, it's fine to mourn, it's a natural part of being left behind. Not ever expecting someone to party at a funeral..
So you should enjoy life while it lasts, the good and the bad.
Since I don't have a set god (still questioning the existence in general) I'd probably be willing to pray to the Christian God, since it's the one he worships. I mean, it's for him, not you.. What's the worst that could happen?
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Posted: Tue Sep 22, 2009 12:48 pm
Well I prayed to my ancestors and they listened. He is now in a rehab/nursing home in his home town. He will stay there till he is strong enough to go back home. So he is closer to us. This old man still has a lot of fight in him!
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Posted: Sat Nov 28, 2009 9:57 pm
Well when this happens I will tend to write or form a set of prayer one to my ancestors to open their arms wide, that they may pull and welcome the family memeber who is dying into the summerlands. Then one to my partoned Lord and Lady to ease his or her pain and that they may go in peace easily. As well I tend todo one to just my Lord asking that like some many times he has died may he reclaim my family members spirit if it may become lost along the road to summerland, and one to my Lady that she my take him in again to herself and when the time is right he my be reborn.
If I am near my family when this happens we typically my a visit if the family member is to stay in the hospital and spend time with him or her while forming a circle( if we can) about them and performing a small ritual of thanks and praise for their life and all they have passed on to us. When my grandmother passed away all the family conjurgated to her and performed the small ritual at the time we all took time and told our fondest and most memorable moment of her and said how she had touched us in some way or another.
Another thing I tend todo, along with my family is undo all the things that can be done in our house. Typically this wad done when woman were birthing in the norse tradition to garantee a smooth birth. My family also does this for a smooth death. Untying curtains, bags, coats, unfolding towles.
thats alot...sorry.
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Posted: Sat Nov 28, 2009 9:59 pm
Kashaku-Tatsu I agree with praying to ancestors to assist him in crossing over. Death is just a transition into the astral, though it can be a tough one if the soul isn't ready to let go of the physical. Building an ancestor altar is a great way to cope with death. You can give them offerings, use it to talk to them in meditation and it keeps a memory of them alive in your home. When they pass you can cook a dinner (like after the wake), maybe their favorite meal, and have everyone tell their favorite memory of the deceased. By keeping their memory alive and celebrating their life you can ease the grieving process. Maybe make it an annual thing like at major holidays until the pain goes away. Oh goodness the idea of cooking their favorite meal(s) is a wonderful idea. I hade never thought of that!
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Posted: Sat Jan 09, 2010 3:59 pm
do pagans have funerals? what goes on, and what happens to the body (like, along the lines of a burial or more like cremation?)?
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Posted: Sun Feb 27, 2011 12:01 am
I've found that death doesn't really affect me as much as it used to. I still grieve, but it doesn't seem to be as bad as it once was. I realize that death is very rarely something that we can control and it's mostly an inevitability that sometimes isn't worth fighting. I'm also reasonably confident in survival after death in some form.
What do I think happens after death? I think it's like leaving one dream and finding yourself in another one. I don't remember being born so I doubt I'll remember dying either.
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