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"Sound of your own heart breaking" (A song I wrote)

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MissAnnathropy

PostPosted: Sun Oct 11, 2009 1:37 pm


Why oh why
What can you see in her?
Why are you so blind
you can't see until tears wash out your eyes,
You don't know a thing about love
until you've heard the sound of your own heart breaking
just go away and leave me alone
I need to think this out
whats wrong with you?
Why oh why
do tears stream down my face,
do I need someones embrace?
Why am I so sick of this life?
why oh why
am I stuck in the middle of this pit?
why oh why
do I have to face this each day,
why won't it go away?
Save me!
please be the one to rescue me
from this place!
Why do you never seem to give up
don't you see you're hurting us all?
you'll break everyone's heart.
Please save me!
I need someone to pull me out
of this ethereal place that I'm stuck in.
Please pull me out!
please rescue me!
don't leave me in the middle of all this!
you don't know a thing about love
until you've heard the sound of your own heart breaking....
you can't see until the tears of love have washed out your eyes
until you've purified you heart of lies.
rescue me!
sa-ave me.
sa-ave me....
PostPosted: Fri Oct 16, 2009 5:31 pm


This is wonderful! I LOVE your use of "ethereal." I love that word. xD

The only thing I would fix:

Quote:
don't you see your hurting us all?


You used the wrong "your." Just change it to "you're." :3

Oh, I love the lines "You don't know a thing about love / until you've heard the sound of your own heart breaking"

This poem has great verisimilitude. :3 (Look up that word if you don't know it. xD)

Agorphia

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MissAnnathropy

PostPosted: Fri Oct 16, 2009 11:45 pm


Lol Thank you! biggrin (I didn't edit it before posting so I'll fix that razz ) he he he I like the word ethereal too my friend used it in some of her writing and I wanted to use that word in one of my songs so yeah lol.
PostPosted: Fri Oct 16, 2009 11:49 pm


Also the lines You don't know a thing about Love until you've heard the sound of your own heart breaking are my favorite oines in that song.... I wrote this song about a personal experience...It wasn't fun but I did write a really good song about it razz ...... all my songs are about things that happen to me or at leat most of them lol biggrin

MissAnnathropy


Agorphia

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PostPosted: Sat Oct 17, 2009 7:33 pm


You're very welcome. :3

Haha, the best work comes from the heart! You can't write about anything unless you've experienced it, right? :3
PostPosted: Wed Oct 28, 2009 2:50 pm


i like it

Love Toxic Kisses


MissAnnathropy

PostPosted: Wed Oct 28, 2009 4:56 pm


Thanks ^^
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