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Kiss me im lrish Vice Captain
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 Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 8:09 pm
Hello, I'm here today to ask women/men that have been raped/molested a question.
Women or men who plead rape/molestation but really just made a bad mistake that night does that make it difficult for you to talk about your situation (being raped or molested)
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 8:45 pm
Well, to be honest, yes it is very difficult. Especially it's been so long since I've ever discuss my past molestation, but if it helps supports people and let them know they aren't alone I'd tell them my story. Let them know my humiliation is the same as theirs. :/ Though I've moved on from it, so should everyone else.
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Kiss me im lrish Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 8:49 pm
iMurderous Well, to be honest, yes it is very difficult. Especially it's been so long since I've ever discuss my past molestation, but if it helps supports people and let them know they aren't alone I'd tell them my story. Let them know my humiliation is the same as theirs. :/ Though I've moved on from it, so should everyone else. "Move on" easier said then done. I'd like to know why it's difficult could you explain? I've got several theory's on why but, I'd like to here it from someone who has actually had some experience.
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 8:59 pm
Humiliation: They don't want to be judge harshly. I mean seriously, would you want to be judge harshly? Once word gets out that you've been raped, your life seems possibly over :/ Your self confidence is gone and you suddenly become antisocial~
And I guess moving on is only easy for me. I find it easy to bury my memories and smile. The past does make you into who you are today. And who I am today makes me proud :3
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Kiss me im lrish Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 9:04 pm
Okay I see, what you said about you hiding it wouldn't it help to get some therapy Instead of bottling it all up?
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 9:13 pm
No you don't see it from my point of view.
Imagine that you were raped. You can't tell your parents due to the fact that you don't want to disappoint them. You can't tell your friends because you think they might judge you and never hang out with you again. You're at a dead end. What else can you do except ignore everything that has happened? Nothing that's what. Until someone finds out, you don't tell. You don't ever tell due to fear. Getting therapy is just worse. You're telling some stranger about what happened. After you were raped, your trust in people fails a bit. So of course therapy isn't going to help you one bit! A lot of people choose to Bottle It All Up rather than Speak The Truth And Be Judge By The Public...
((hahaha I enjoy debating about this :3 **Is a lover of debates**))
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Kiss me im lrish Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 9:17 pm
That's absolutely ridiculous, In a situation example: A young female Is raped while walking to school. It's not her fault she has no reason to fear any of the thing's you've listed.
You on the other hand, I'm not aware of your situation nor do I know the whole story so I can't say the same for you.
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 9:22 pm
It's true she could have no reason to fear it, but almost everyone in the world fears it.
Would you prefer to listen to good comments about yourself or horrible ones?
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 9:22 pm
@iMurderous
But that doesn't necessarily hold true for everyone. Bottling up seems to help because it's a quick solution, it's within your grasp but then somewhere down along the road the bottle begins to crack and the contents of it will seep out until the bottle finally breaks and everything gushes out. It's minimizing what happened. But then again, it can be a coping mechanism because we tend to do what we need to do to make it through the day. Simply surviving. What seems to be a normal reaction to one person isn't always the same for the other. For me, therapy helps and it didn't make it worse.
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 9:29 pm
Ah biggrin
I see your point Jinx. I have been in therapy before, but it didn't help one bit. The lady kept repeating the same things I was hearing over and over. I got sick of it. Though, I wouldn't be in therapy if it wasn't for my parents who are too caring >.>" And Yes, bottling it up is an easy way out. I also agree that the bottle will break, which is possibly how we know about rapes and molestations today.
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Kiss me im lrish Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 9:38 pm
iMurderous It's true she could have no reason to fear it, but almost everyone in the world fears it. Would you prefer to listen to good comments about yourself or horrible ones? "Almost everyone In the world fears it" false facts, maybe you fear it but there are a lot of women who are brave and will talk about it and do whatever it takes to get the rapist/molest thrown In prison.
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 9:41 pm
iMurderous Ah biggrin I see your point Jinx. I have been in therapy before, but it didn't help one bit. The lady kept repeating the same things I was hearing over and over. I got sick of it. Though, I wouldn't be in therapy if it wasn't for my parents who are too caring >.>" And Yes, bottling it up is an easy way out. I also agree that the bottle will break, which is possibly how we know about rapes and molestations today. Or maybe some women/man reported it and talked about it after it happened to him/her, everyone doesn't pick the bottle solution yeah it's easy but it won't last.
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Kiss me im lrish Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 9:42 pm
Kiss me im lrish iMurderous It's true she could have no reason to fear it, but almost everyone in the world fears it. Would you prefer to listen to good comments about yourself or horrible ones? "Almost everyone In the world fears it" false facts, maybe you fear it but there are a lot of women who are brave and will talk about it and do whatever it takes to get the rapist/molest thrown In prison. Hey why else do you think I said Almost? I sorta fear it. I don't like disappointing my parents at all. Friends I could careless~ Best friends are the ones who'll support me no matter what c: Only Best friends And Family for me.
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Posted: Mon Feb 15, 2010 9:53 pm
iMurderous Kiss me im lrish iMurderous It's true she could have no reason to fear it, but almost everyone in the world fears it. Would you prefer to listen to good comments about yourself or horrible ones? "Almost everyone In the world fears it" false facts, maybe you fear it but there are a lot of women who are brave and will talk about it and do whatever it takes to get the rapist/molest thrown In prison. Hey why else do you think I said Almost? I sorta fear it. I don't like disappointing my parents at all. Friends I could careless~ Best friends are the ones who'll support me no matter what c: Only Best friends And Family for me. I saw you said "almost" It's still false, and ok cool about you not liking to disappointing your bffs and parents anyway thanks for the information I'm done debating.
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Kiss me im lrish Vice Captain
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Posted: Tue Mar 09, 2010 6:16 pm
I can't really understand your question. D:
But, I'm going to try to anwser it the best I can...
Well, it's always been difficult to tell anyone anything about it, for a long time...
And considering that I'm pregnant, most people just automatically assume what happened, so I don't have to tell them anything anyways. But, for those who care, and don't make assumptions, I'll usually tell my story easier. (?)((My English fails, so badly. xD))
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