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 Posted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 12:48 am
So, I've been worrying a bit.
There is a new guy, he's sweet, loving, makes me laugh, we have things in common, and I would really love to date him and eventually call him my boyfriend.
But in the back of my head I'm comparing him and I over analyze each tiny little thing about him and it gets super pathetic.
For example. My last two ex's and a few other guys I had dated had the first letter of "J" they were all born around the same months or different years. They all liked similar colors to one another. stressed See?? OVER ANALYZE!! and I know that deep down it really didn't help that I slept with a few of them even though I liked them so much.
I want to give Justin a chance, I want him to know that I'm not easy and the thing is he wasn't born and raised in my town (which is a good thing!!) Guys around my town are just known for hit and quit it, and so far it doesn't seem that way at all. I feel so stuck...I haven't been in a relationship for more than 5 years and I'm hating myself analyzing him like an insect. sad
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Posted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 10:20 am
Over analysing on something like this seems normal, at least to me. You really seem to like this guy. If you like this guy so much that it is making you worry so much, why not approach him? worst case he says no, best case you find your self in another relationship.
I would say be open with him about your feelings.
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Posted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 8:17 pm
Pursue with necessary caution?
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Posted: Sun Mar 11, 2012 9:16 pm
Everyone has something in common if you look hard enough. We all even probably have something in common with Hitler, whether a birthday, a favorite color, a shoe size, a parent's name, height, weight, etc. It doesn't mean that we're anything like Hitler though. So you can't really judge Justin for having a few random things that don't even matter in common with some guys you don't like. So if you like him, if you want to date him, and if he wants to date you, go for it. Don't worry about that other crap.
On a bit of a side note, guys around your town might have a reputation for being players, but I'm sure they're not all players. That would be almost impossible. And if it's not true for all the guys, then why bother buying into or repeating the stereotype at all? Why not just see and treat everyone as a separate individual?
On another bit of a side note, every person, every situation, and every relationship is different. That means we're all ready for sex at a different time in our life and at different times in our relationships. I've had sex the first day that I met people. It's what I wanted to do, I am ok with it, and I don't make any apologies for it. I know that's not for everyone, and I would never put anyone down for not doing it. No one should be called easy or a slut just because they had sex when someone else thinks they wouldn't have if they were in their shoes. And no one should be called a prude just because they didn't have sex when someone else thinks they would have if they were in their shoes. No one can say for sure what they would have done or not done if they were in someone shoes, so those kinds of names and labels aren't really fair or even logical. So you shouldn't worry about Justin thinking you're easy. Your past is your past. You should accept it, and so should he if he wants to be with you. If he tries to put you down or label you because of it, then he's clearly not right for you anyway.
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