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 Posted: Wed Feb 18, 2015 11:07 am
"The following contest is a tag team match, and is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first..."
Weather: Cold. Snow-covered grounds, flurries.
Wind: 6 mph
Temperature: 15 degrees Fahrenheit.
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Posted: Wed Feb 18, 2015 2:43 pm
Hangover hangover hangover hangover (hangover)
Hangover hangover hangover hangover (hangover)
Party’s over, it ain’t over
Tryna’ make a bad memory over and over
Hangover hangover hangover hangover (hangover)
Hangover hangover hangover hangover (hangover)
Party’s over, it ain’t over
Tryna find a single piece of me game over
Hangover. Hangover. Hangover. Hangover
Tryna find a single piece of me game over
"Hangover" by Psy and Snoop Dogg hits the PA system as a few of the fans who weren't literally frozen to their seats got up. Dong-Gun Kim and Daquan Jones pop out from the back, many neon lights spouting out around the stage as the small Asian man dances his way down the ramp swigging a beer. His tag team partner trudges down as well, pointing to fans and handing out high fives and glow sticks. Drink til you drunk
Smoke like a broke’ stove
Don’t quit take flight
I can’t remember last night
It’s aight this the life of a superstar
Psy-fi with that boy trooping hard couping cars snoopy hard
In the paint drink another cup until I fall flat
All lead and then some 1-5-1 done dilly
Really for sure that
I’m tow back intoxicated
Change over, game over, hangover, faded
Body s**t miss
Deche reoki yes kkoekkori moschajgesseu
I-i-inimanimo catch a lady by the toe
Anyeppeumyeon yeppeoboilttae kkaji pparabeorigo The two men enter the ring and continue their spectacle, Dong-Gun climbing up a turnbuckle before tossing his beer bottle into the ground to a pop from the crowd. He turns and leaps into the ring, landing in front of Daquan. The two do a little handshake and turn to face the ramp, awaiting their opponents for tonight. "The following tag team contest is set for one fall! Introducing first, from the Gangnam District, weighing in at a combined weight of 530 pounds...Dong-Gun Kim and Daquan Jones.....Sugchwi!"
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Posted: Thu Feb 19, 2015 10:22 am
The twanging of the airy guitar hit the PA system, and the fans stood up in excitement and reverence of the Old and Pissed Off. The stage was still raised enough for an opening to appear in the center of it while the lights changed into an eerie blue and indigo color that cooled the mood. It was slow, it was plodding, but it was surely Shadow who was being raised up from under the stage, sitting in his rocking chair. Moving back and forth, he simply sat and stared forward while the Porcupine Tree song played into the lyrics, even after the elevator had reached the apex.Sunlight. Coming Through The Haze.
No Gaps In The Blind
To Let It Inside
The Bed Is Unmade
Some Music Still Plays
TV. Yeah It's Always On.
The Flicker On The Screen
A Movie Actress Screams
I'm Basking In The s**t
Flowing Out Of It[And from the Land of the Setting Sun, weighing in at two hundred and twenty-nine pounds, Shadow!]Shadow was slow to rise, giving off a feeling that he was older even still than he looked, but the wiser fans and wrestlers knew that it was a mistake to think that they could take advantage of Shadow's age, or that he wasn't still extremely dangerous as a human being and a wrestler. The look was a front, the legendary wrestler was more than able and capable. Shadow politely dusted himself off and gave a gentle bow, before making his way down to the ring, ignoring most of the fan reactions at ringside, whether positive or negative. He had only one focus right now.I'm Stoned. In The Mall Again.
Terminally Bored.
Shuffling 'Round The Stores.
And Shoplifting Is Getting
So Last Year's Thing.
X-Box. Is A God To Me.
A Finger On The Switch
My Mother Is A b***h
My Father Gave Up
Ever Trying To Talk To MeShadow slid into the ring, turning around as he did so, so that he ended up facing the stage that he'd come from rather than his opponent. He looked around as the fans cheered him and boo'd him thanks to his legendary status. He got up on all fours, then to one knee, before finally standing up tall. Shadow made his way over to one corner of the ring and carefully balanced himself climbing to the middle rope, before bending back and arching his head, spraying a putrid black mist into the air above the ring. Shadow turned and hopped off the turnbuckle, crouching in the corner, ready to begin the humbling.How Can I Be Sure I'm Here?
The Pills That I've Been Taking Confuse Me.
I Need To Know That Someone Sees That
There's Nothing Left
I Simply Am Not Here.
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Posted: Thu Feb 19, 2015 2:59 pm
The screen fades to white. Be aware that something is about to happen. Or has already happened. It's all about tenses, really. Isn't it strange how these posts rely on an amalgamation of past happenings set with future openings? Well, I think it's neat. A low voice, which could be described as 'velvety,' begins to hum it's words of wisdom. Rule number two of creating a tag team: Do NOT talk about creating a tag team.
Now.
Close your eyes.
Follow me down.
*click*
Imagine, if you will, an ocean. An ocean of water. Or perhaps an ocean of stars. Perhaps filled with milkshake. Imagine you are floating through it, undisturbed by the fact that you cannot, in fact, breathe. Suddenly, you become aware of this fact. You struggle, eventually going still as the air cuts from your brain. You are dead.
Now, imagine death, if you will. As your spirit leaves your body, it feels like it is floating. Visualise it, now. What does it float through? An ocean of water. Or perhaps an ocean of stars. Perhaps filled with milkshake. You are not disturbed that you cannot breathe, as you are dead. You are at peace. At one with the milkshake. Relaxed. You continue to float. You slowly come to a stop, completely suspended. As you halt, stranded in that ocean, you feel two arms wrap around you, from behind. They caress you softly, as a female voice whispers in your ear:
"Tiger is love," she says. "Tiger is life." As the mysterious voice finishes it's narrative, the screen fades back from white, showing the ring, with everything as it was before. Except now, Super Tiger Hat Neo Ultra IV is in Shadow's corner. Almost as if he'd been there all along. Or perhaps he just walked in casually while the bullshit was happening. Either way, the match could begin now.
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Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2015 12:35 am
How weird! Dong-Gun didn't know they'd be facing TWO asians tonight! Dong-Gun took a step back, patting Daquan on the chest and telling him to start the match. The large black guy nodded at him and swiped at his nose, standing in place as he was ready to be joined in the ring by either Shadow or Tiger Hat. Who would step up to the near 7 footer?
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Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2015 12:06 pm
Let's get this started.
Na hangukmal moteyo.
Yeong-eo? Right.
So there I was stood.
This giant Daquan man
Not that far away.
"Shadow, my partner,
Take a moment to prepare.
Tiger Hat has this!"
Well then, a slow step
To the seven-foot monster.
Tiger Hat looked up.
Perhaps not too smart -
Tiger Hat being so small -
To start off this match.
A lock-up, perhaps?
No, that will not really work,
Not with this man's size.
Snow flake in his eye,
His hat taking the low brunt
Of a slight snow fall.
Crackle underfoot,
Pressure on the snow layers,
No chance of a grip.
Hopefully one move
Could change his circumstances
And give him the edge.
Which move, you might ask?
Why, it is a simple move
With a leap, aimed low.
Tiger's old siggy,
Not particularly hard
To pull off, for all.
The only move left
That he does in every match,
It is the DROPKICK!
Aim it low, Tiger,
To the knee of the giant.
Bring him down to size!
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Posted: Sat Feb 21, 2015 12:34 pm
The dropkick from the exotic and wild Japanese man connected with Daquans knee, dropping him forward onto his other knee. However, if Tiger Hat came close to take advantage, Daquan would lunge at him, attempting to take him down!
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Posted: Sun Feb 22, 2015 10:31 am
Tiger Hat would of
gone for a second dropkick,
This time to the head.
However, as his
Feet left the ground, as is want,
He was met mid-air!
Tackle! Crash! Grounded!
Daquan strikes for the takedown!
Tiger Hat crashes.
Back on the canvas,
Tiger Hat gasps deep for air,
Winded by the blow.
Unfortunately,
Advantage had now been lost,
All in one quick move.
A bad start for him
It seemed to be going well
Until that counter.
While not out just yet
The enemy has the floor
Now his time to strike.
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Posted: Thu Feb 26, 2015 11:12 am
Daquan, on top of he impressively savvy Tiger Hat, tried to force the much smaller man to stay on the mat as he pinned, hoping brute force could sooth this raging beast. None the less, Dong-Gun was standing on the bottom rope and leaning over the top, his hand out stretched in case Daquan couldn't get the pin!
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Posted: Sat Feb 28, 2015 3:44 pm
Shadow hated the way that Tiger Hat made him feel. Zen. This was worse than Prozac. But, obligations as they were, Shadow didn't want Tiger Hat costing him a win. As the ref's hand smacked for two, Shadow climbed through the ropes and made a quick sprint to stomp on Daquan.
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Posted: Sun Mar 01, 2015 12:31 am
Backstage in The Marauder Room..."KIKI! Get me some more <******** caviar!" Freakshow and a very large Nigerian Prince sit in the Midnight Marauders Incorporated V.I.P room. Offshore banking and investing are funny things. You meet lots of people you never thought you would meet. One minute you're in Switzerland discussing your contingency plan inside of a Sauna with an Arabian man wearing a glass eye, the next minute you're being chloroformed and dragged inside of an armored van. If someone had told a young Freakshow that he would in the future find his business bankrolled by the son of a blood diamond warlord who had been brainwashed and drugged into believing that he was retired pro-wrestler Mike Landry, he would have said, "Mike Landry? Retired? thank ******** god," likely unaware that it was he who had done the brainwashing in order to avoid having his hands cut off by a potentially vindictive new business partner. Kiki, boyservant of The Prince, brings Freakshow his caviar before resuming rubbing oil on the large African who called himself Mark Laundre. "Laundre feel lonely. Laundre don't understand American Culture. Laundre want friend." The blank eyed Nigerian stares at Freakshow with a look of stupidity that the blonde found rather intimidating. Swallowing Freakshow looks at his new friend who was glistening with oils. "Come on Mark.. I'm you're friend. I'm the only friend you need, just me, you and Kiki!"The big black boy shakes his had vehemently. Freakshow had enormous difficult crossing the language gap with the young man. In addition to not speaking english Mark Laundre appeared to be functionally retarded. Whether this was genuine or whether he was merely imitating his idol remained a mystery both to Freakshow and the boyservant who was being paid in pieces of grilled chicken. Laundre looks over at the television, he points at it. Tag team wrestling. An emo, a tiger and two slant eye. Freak squints, not seeing what was especially important aside from the diversity of lifestyles occupying the squared circle. "Laundre want REAL FRIENDS. Laundre want tag team! TAG. TEAM!" The big fat oaf claps his hands together and lets his mouth hang sort of half open, allowing Freakshow to see exactly where the man had forgotten to brush. The veteran shakes his head. "Look big guy I've been in a few tag teams and the odds that you actually like your partner is-"The fat ******** cuts in, grabbing Freakshow cheeks and forcing him to stare at the screen, pointing at the emo and the tiger. "LAUNDRE. WANT. TAG. TEAM." Oh god it smelled. It smelled terrible. "...OK Mark. I'll get you a tag team partner.."The Nigerian wraps his arms around Freakshow and squeezes him tight getting all of his disgusting African oils all over his Gucci suit. Right between his fat tits is where Freaks nose lands as the pig expresses his genuine admiration towards the million dollar playboy who had trained him rather informally. After experiencing the hug the Marauder leans over the couch and begins to dry heave while Mark Laundre rocks back and forth in his seat humming the tune to This Is How A Heart Breaks by Rob Thomas, his eyes following the tag team action intently..
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Posted: Wed Mar 04, 2015 2:51 pm
Shadow stomped down on Daquan to break up the pinfall. On the apron, Dong-Gun drunkly scaled to the top rope, the ref unable to stop him as he tried to get Shadow out of the ring. Before the vet could though, Dong-Gun would leap off of the top turnbuckle, aiming a crossbody at Shadow to try and take him down! Daquan got up as Dong-Gun did so, aiming to measure Tiger Hat. As Tiger Hat would slowly get up, Daquan would look to grab him and send him back down into the mat with the Burning Hammer!
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Posted: Wed Mar 04, 2015 7:17 pm
As he was lifted High above the enemy, Back to the hard ground Tiger Hat struggles, Unaccepting of his fate. Defeat was not his! Snaking out of hold, Floating behind Daquan's back, Attempting counter. Grabbing giant arms, Tiger would attempt his move Against his rival. Original plan For Tiger to lift Mountain It just would not work. Forgetting his move, Arms still under his control, Tiger would shove him. A solid front push, Against his Korean back, towards the ring ropes. Distance unlikely, But that did not matter now, For he had a plan. Tiger would leap up Attempting the old faithful; Dropkick... to the back!
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Posted: Thu Mar 05, 2015 10:27 pm
How BBW had stooped so low as to have not one, but two wrestlers competing drunk befuddled Shadow. Standards were at an all time low these days. Of course, Shadow never really had standards to begin with. It was of no consequence to him then that he forcefully traded spaces with the ref so as to save himself from being splashed by Dong-Gun.
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Posted: Mon Mar 09, 2015 11:16 am
Dong Gun was sent flying into the ref, knocking him down and taking him out! The Korean rolled out of the ring and to the ground, holding his gut as he lay outside. However, Shadow wasn't out of the woods! Tiger Hat had came back against Daquan, driving a dropkick into his back...and sending him right into Shadow! Would the large black man collide with Shadow and take him out, or would he find another way to avoid pain?
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