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Lolita no Kitsune Vice Captain
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 Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 4:09 pm
OMG! I found a chain letter...so ******** funny! I love it!! I think we should post ChainLetters here since we hate them so much and then talk about how stupid some ******** is! Agree? Good.
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Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 4:12 pm
Dear freshmen,
Congrats! Now you're the lowest of the low.
Here are just a few helpful words of advice:
1.) You are NOT cool.
2.) Everyone does hate you.
3.) You are annoying.
- Do not wear ripped jeans and an Abercrombie shirt because you want to make "a variety of friends"
- Do not slick your bangs to your face and wear "bracelets" in you're ears because you think that you're hood.
- You are a F-R-E-S-H-M-A-N not a "freshie"...Shut up you sound gay.
- Don't think you're smart because you filled up water bottles with vodka and snuck it onto your 8th grade field trip. We've all done it...So don't be proud.
- Don't try the emo scene. Just don't do it.
- DO NOT think that the upperclass girls/guys are your best friends.
- Don't think that you have privacy now that you're in high school. Once you're here, your business is everyone's business, yes there is STILL drama, probably even more.
- Don't try to sit at upperclassmen lunch tables. You will be picked up and thrown onto the floor.
- You'll never be as hot as the '07, '08, and '09 ppl. So don't try.
- Don't try to act older than you really are. The way you walk, dress, and talk just has freshman written all over you.
- You're "The class of '10" haha...Enough said.
- PLEASE NO MORE XXXL shirts and ridiculously baggy pants on skinny white kids, nobody likes white chocolate. Allow me to kick you in the face.
- If you are going to try and rebel, it most likely won't work.
- Don't tell everyone you love your boyfriend after 2 days, you're an idiot.
- Don't be a slut. This should be the number one rule.
- DO NOT crowd our halls like cattle, because the upperclassmen can, and most likely will, push you out of the way. You will get hurt.
- Don't try to get with a boy/girl who's older than you. Chances are, if they are attractive they are TAKEN, their girlfriend/boyfriend will have no problem ******** you up.
Welcome to hell.
Believe me. You can't win. Have fun being a freshman...For a fun filled year with no life and no opinion what so ever.
Sincerely,
The Classes of '07, '08, and '09.
If you're an upperclassmen, repost this.
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Lolita no Kitsune Vice Captain
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teh Youko Kurama~sama Crew
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Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 4:16 pm
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Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 4:17 pm
ZOMG! I love that Mimi! CLASS OF '07 RULES ALL! heart xp xd whee mrgreen
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H a m b e r g l e r Vice Captain
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Lolita no Kitsune Vice Captain
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Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 4:35 pm
Quote: - You're "The class of '10" haha...Enough said.
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Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 5:10 pm
I know! We're '07, it has a nice ring to it. '10 sounds sucky! lmfao, ha ha those poor losers. They can't say class of '010... it's just weird....
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H a m b e r g l e r Vice Captain
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Lolita no Kitsune Vice Captain
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Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 5:22 pm
No they have to say:
"We're the class of ten!"
We say:
"We're the class of Oh Seven! Oh yeah!" LMFAO! <3333 We kick a**!
CLASS OF '007 BITCHES! JAMES BOND JUNIORS AND SECRET AGENT (Psycho) SENIORS!
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Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 5:25 pm
Do you think we're gonna be Secret Agent Seniors? @.@
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H a m b e r g l e r Vice Captain
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Lolita no Kitsune Vice Captain
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Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 5:27 pm
-Shurgs- It's the only thing I can remember that was remaining...so I used it...o.o;; LMAO!
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Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 5:32 pm
10 of Daddy's Rules for Dating
Rule One:
If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering
a package, becasue you're sure not picking anything up.
Rule Two:
You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance
at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If
you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I
will remove them.
Rule Three:
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age
to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling
off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all
of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and
open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise:
You may come to the door with your underwear showing and
your pants ten sizes to big, and I will not object. However, in
order to ensure that your clothes do no, infact come off during
the course of you date with my daughter, I will take my electric
nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.
Rule Four:
I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without
utilizing a "Barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me
elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrrier, and I will kill
you.
Rule Five:
It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each
other, we should talk aobut sports, politics, and other issues of
the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require
from you is an indication of when you expect to have my
duaghter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from
you on this subject is: early."
Rule Six:
I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many
opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as
it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out
with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until
she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you
cry.
Rule Seven:
As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to
appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget.
If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be
dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process than
can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of
just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like
changing the oil in my car?
Rule Eight:
The following places are not appropriate for a date with my
daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer
than a wooden stool. Places where there is darkness. PLaces
where there is dancing,holding hands, or happiness. Places
where the ambient temperature is warm enough to introduce my
duaghter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything
othere than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka - zipped
up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme
are to be avoided; movies which features chan saws are okay.
Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes
are better.
Rule Nine:
Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding,
middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my
daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless god of your universe.
If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one
chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the
truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the
house. Do not trifle with me.
Rule Ten:
Be afraid,. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake
the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in
over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange stargts
acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the
guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as
you pull into the driveways you should exit the car with both
hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in
a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely
and early, then return to your car - there is no need for you to
come inside. The camoflaged face at the window is mine.
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teh Youko Kurama~sama Crew
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teh Youko Kurama~sama Crew
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Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 5:46 pm
Art Thou Normal?
Facts about Americans. Did you know that........
-only 30% of us can flare our nostrils
-21% of us don't make our bed daily. 5% of us never do.
-Men do 29% of laundry each week. Only 7% of women trust their
husbands to do it correctly.
-40% of women have hurled footwear at a man
-85% of men don't use the slit in their underwear
-67.5% of men were tightie whities (briefs)
-the average bra size today is 36C whereas 10 years ago it was a
34B
-85% of women wear the wrong bra size
-3 out of 4 of us store our dollar bills in rigid order with
singles leading up to higher denominations
-13% of us admit to occasionally doing our offspring's homework
-91% of us lie regularly
-27% admit to cheating on a test or quiz
-29% admit they've intentionally stolen something from a store
-50% admit they regularly sneak food into movie theaters to
avoid the high prices of snack foods
-90% believe in divine retribution
-10% believe in the 10 Commandments
-82% believe in an afterlife
-45% believe in ghosts
-13% (mostly men) have spent a night in jail
-29% of us are virgins when we marry
-58.4% have called into work sick when we weren't
-10% of us switch tags in the store to pay less for an item
-Over 50% believe in spanking---but only a child over 2 years
old
-35% give to charity at least once a month
-How far would you go for $10 million?
-25% would abandon their friends, family, and church
-7% would murder
-69% eat the cake before the frosting
-When nobody else is around, 47% drink straight from the carton
-85% of us will eat Spam this year
-70% of us drink orange juice daily
-Snickers is the most popular candy
-22% of us skip lunch daily
-9% of us skip breakfast daily
-66% of us eat cereal regularly
-22% of all restaurant meals include french fries
-14% of us eat the watermelon seeds
-only 13% brush our teeth from side to side
-45% use mouthwash every day
-22% leave the glob of toothpaste in the sink
-the typical shower is 101 degrees F
-Nearly 1/3 of U.S. women color their hair
-9% of women and 8% of men have had cosmetic surgery
-53% of women will not leave the house without makeup on
-58% of women paint their nails regularly
-62% of us pop our zits
-33% of women lie about their weight
-10% of us claim to have seen a ghost
-57% have had deja vu
-49% believe in ESP
-4 out of 5 of us have suffered from hemorrhoids
-the average girl starts her period at age 12
-44% have broken a bone
-only 30% of us know our cholesterol level
-14% have attended a self-help meeting
-15% regularly go to a shrink
-78% would rather die quickly than live in a retirement home
-46.5% of men say they ALWAYS put the seat down after they've
used the toilet, yet women claim to ALWAYS find it up
-30% of us refuse to sit on a public toilet seat
-54.2% of us always wash our hands after using the toilet
-23.5% admit they don't always flush
-45.2% pee in the shower
-44.9% pee in the ocean
-28.1% pee in the pool
-55.2% will let someone else come in the bathroom while they're
using the toilet
-39% of us peek in our host's bathroom cabinet. 17% have been
caught by the host.
-81.3% would tell an acquaintance to zip his pants
-29% of us ignore RSVP
-71.6% of us eavesdrop
-22% are functionally illiterate
-less than 10% are trilingual
-37% claim to know how to use all the features on their VCR
-53% prefer ATM machines over tellers
-56% of women do the bills in a marriage
-2 out of 3 of us wouldn't give up our spouse even for a night
for a million bucks
-20% of us have played in a band at one time in our life
-40% of us have had music lessons
-44% reuse tinfoil
-57% save pretty gift paper to reuse
-66% of women and 59% of men have used a mix to cook and taken
credit for doing it from scratch
-53% read their horoscopes regularly
-16% of us have forgotten our own wedding anniversary (mostly
men)
-59% of us say we're average-looking -blacks are more than twice
as likely to call themselves beautiful
-90% of us depend on alarm clocks to wake us
-53% of us would take advice from Anne Landers
-28% of us have skinny-dipped. 14% with the opposite sex.
-51% of adults dress up for a Halloween festivity -on average,
we send 38 Christmas cards every year
-20% of women consider their parents to be their best friends
-2 out of 5 have married their first love
-the biggest cause of matrimonial fighting is money
-only 4% asked the parents' approval for their bride's hand
-1 in 5 men proposed on his knees
-6% propose over the phone
-71% can drive a stick-shift car
-45% of us consistently follow the speed limit
-2/3 of us speed up at a yellow light
-1/3 of us don't wear seat belts
-12% of men never use their car blinkers
ARE YOU NORMAL?
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Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 5:51 pm
The other 2 remaining choices were Shaking it Up seniors, and See ya later Seniors. I wanted Snazzy Seniors.... crying But that one didn't make it. I already know what our Senior name is stare and I can't tell anyone...
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H a m b e r g l e r Vice Captain
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teh Youko Kurama~sama Crew
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Posted: Thu Aug 10, 2006 9:01 pm
The New Priest
A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After
mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. The monsignor replied:
"When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of
vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip."
So the next Sunday he took the nomsignors advice. At the beginning of
the sremon, he got nervous and took a drink. He proceeded to talk up a
storm. Upon his return to his office after mass, he found the following
note taped to the door:
1. Sip the vodka, don't gulp.
2. There are 10 commandments, not 12.
3. There are 12 disciples, not 10.
4. Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
5. Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his a**.
6. We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
7. The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior,
and the Spook.
8.David slew Goliath, he did not kick the s**t out of him.
9. When David was hit by a rock and knocked off his donkey, do not say
he was stoned off his a**.
10. We do not refer to the cross as the Big T.
11. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said, "Take this and
eat it for it is my body." He did not say, "Eat me."
12. The Virgin Mary is not called Mary with the Cherry.
13. The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub,
Thanks for the Grub, Yeah God.
14. Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at St. Peter's, not a
peter pulling contest at St. Taffy's.
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Posted: Fri Aug 11, 2006 7:57 pm
darkspirals666 The other 2 remaining choices were Shaking it Up seniors, and See ya later Seniors. I wanted Snazzy Seniors.... crying But that one didn't make it. I already know what our Senior name is stare and I can't tell anyone...
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Lolita no Kitsune Vice Captain
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Lolita no Kitsune Vice Captain
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Posted: Fri Aug 11, 2006 7:59 pm
teh Youko Kurama~sama The New PriestA new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. The monsignor replied: "When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip." So the next Sunday he took the nomsignors advice. At the beginning of the sremon, he got nervous and took a drink. He proceeded to talk up a storm. Upon his return to his office after mass, he found the following note taped to the door: 1. Sip the vodka, don't gulp. 2. There are 10 commandments, not 12. 3. There are 12 disciples, not 10. 4. Jesus was consecrated, not constipated. 5. Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his a**. 6. We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C. 7. The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior, and the Spook. 8.David slew Goliath, he did not kick the s**t out of him. 9. When David was hit by a rock and knocked off his donkey, do not say he was stoned off his a**. 10. We do not refer to the cross as the Big T. 11. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said, "Take this and eat it for it is my body." He did not say, "Eat me." 12. The Virgin Mary is not called Mary with the Cherry. 13. The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A-Dub-Dub, Thanks for the Grub, Yeah God. 14. Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at St. Peter's, not a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy's.
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