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 Posted: Tue Sep 05, 2006 12:14 am
Have your parents ever...done the little thing where they encourage you to be straight?
Like...hint around about some boy you're friends with, or...try to set you up on a date with someone of the opposite sex, or...you know, stuff like that?
This really only applies if your parents know or suspect you of being non-straight, hahaha. But yeah...I think my parents are beyond this point never mind..., though some of my friends' parents are obviously not.
Has this ever happened to you? Doesn't it feel like...really weird and awkward? =___= Any tips on how to "combat" it? XD
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Posted: Tue Sep 05, 2006 9:01 am
Oh yes, that's happened to me. A lot.
Like, if my mum sees me and my friends who are girls doing something silly like tickling too closely or something, she has this expression that's torn between amusement and disgust at the same time...then she takes me aside and starts a lecture about how girls shouldn't do all that...that guys are the ones...blah blah. rolleyes
Luckily, they themselves discourage dates at this age since they stand on the same stage as me when I said I only wanted to concentrate on studying.
I haven't really found any way to combat it...but hey, just do anything you might want to when she's turned her back. xp
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Posted: Tue Sep 05, 2006 10:49 am
My mother does it (and I sense that it's usually the mothers who nag their children the most about hooking up, getting hitched, and popping babies). I know she totally suspects me, and drops a "word of wisdom" or three (aka nagging) about finding a good financially stable man to settle down with eventually and yadda yadda yadda. These days it's few and far between but it still gets a rile out of me when she mentions anything like that. I cope with it by dismissing it and changing the subject, though I think I should try the direct approach like my girlfriend did who plainly told her mother that she had no intention of marrying and having kids ever. razz
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Posted: Fri Sep 15, 2006 4:25 pm
Like you said this doesn't really apply to me, because I'm not fully out...but I have some stories like that...
My Dad once: Are there going to be boys at this party? mad
Me:...Uh...yeah...
Dad:Okay! 3nodding
I just thought it was hilarious...some other ones...
My friend Iulia: Another plus is that we get to check out high school guys!
Me: ...Uh...
And when my friends talk about guys being hot and stuff I just kinda sit in the corner not talking...xDD
Oh, and the most surprising thing EVER happened today...
So I take french at the high school then I ride a shuttle bus back to my school, and so do kids from other middle schools...so I was talking to some kids from another middle school if they knew some people I knew...so I asked about a kid (Max...) I sat by for two years stright in elementry school who I haven't seen since...I always "hated" him in elementry school and thought he was annoying...but I REALLY missed him in 6th grade and developed my last major crush on a guy on him...well heres our conversation...
Me: Hey, do you know Max {insert last name here}?
Kid from Pioneer: Yeah...he's really weird...he gay...no but seriously, I'm not just using that as an insult...though I kinda am...he's seriously gay, he asked a guy to one of our dances.
My friend Iulia who knew Max: Hahahah!
Me: *insert fake laughter*
I can't even say how surprised I was, I mean that could just be a rumor but one thing ran through my mind..."Cheesie! It's a sign! It's telling you to come out to your friends!!"
That was the moment of the day that really stuck out in my mind...it's probably actually the moment of the week...
Edit: Holy s**t...I wrote a novel... eek
-//- cool -//-
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Posted: Sat Sep 16, 2006 8:39 am
I'd be dead if I came out to my parents. >.< I wish I could, but it would not turn out well. My mom suspected me of being a lesbian (when I started spending more time than usual with my ex because she thought she was just a friend to me then >.>) and she went on and off about it... sometimes yelling at me and sometimes making subtle hints, but I never gave myself away. I don't know if she still does, but this is my mom and I'll never know. sweatdrop
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Posted: Sat Sep 16, 2006 1:21 pm
My mom totally suspected it of me when I refused to go to church after hearing anti-gay rants two weeks in a row. Oh, and around that time I wanted to see Brokeback Mountain. . . My mom asked why I was "so pro-gay" and I just shrugged and said that there's nothing wrong with gay people. And she one time came into my room when I was watching music videos and subtley asked if I was a lesbian. I was just like "LAWL IM WATCHING U2 OF COURSE IM NOT A LESBIAN SEE SEE IM DROOLING OVER BONO. COUGH. COUGH." Okay, I was less obvious than that. But yes.
She hasn't bugged me about it since, which is odd, because I keep accidentally dropping hints. . . "I won't go to a dance with a boy", "I WANT A MR. AND MRS. SMITH POSTER!!11!" (she said "Brad Pitt IS pretty yummy in that movie, isn't he?" and I was like "Uhm. . No." then she stared at me. XD;; ), and all the rainbows.
The most she does when it comes to trying to straightenify me is that she alwas talks about men she finds attractive. But that's not that unusual for her. . .
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Posted: Sat Sep 16, 2006 5:56 pm
~.~ My mother always seems to ask me "Do you think that boy's cute?" xd I sort of laugh and say no at the same time. She knows, she has known, and she'd better remember. >[
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Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 10:54 am
yes, but im not sure if she knows im bi or something. she just saw me watching a Tatu music video. then she started randomly pointing out guys on the street she thought were cute. then she said i should go out with my friend spencer.
it was like
mom "wow, he's cute" pointing at some random high schooler
me "mom what are you talking about? o.O" cuz im in junior high o.o
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Posted: Sun Sep 17, 2006 8:06 pm
Lesse here~. Yup, everytime I bring up homosexuality and/or any other sexuality related to that when speaking with my mum, she begins to tell me why I shouldn't hook up with girls. Things like, "It's sick when a female is 'eating' out of another female," and, "I don't want you to go through something like being with a girl. It's too painful." Why? Because, apparently, she thinks that girls understand each other more, and if a strong bond such as love is broken, it'll hurt more than when with a boy. Well, here's something. I get emotionally hurt more by boys than girls, I think of boys as friends/brothers (nothing more, nothing less...unless I somehow am attracted to one). I've hung out with boys during most of my early years of living, had my first crush on a girl at the age of 4, and I tend to get along with boys more than girls. Yes! I have much more insight on the male population than the female population (so, basically, I'm shy around other girls). Then again, boys aren't too accepting of having girl friends hanging out with them like their guy friends and s**t like that (at my school). X3 So, I rarely hang out with anyone. - w 0 Note: I had all male friends in elementary, and periodically stared at the same sex's posterior because I sometimes got bored fighting for my male infatuation subject.
Thing is, I dress like a boy, periodically look like one (and am mistaken for being one), and thus, when I told my mom I thought I was bisexual, she's like, "I was wondering when you'd tell me that. Don't worry about it, it's just a phase." After that, I gave it a bit of thought (despite the fact she told me not to), and I was actually pansexual ever since I could remember, usually liking someone because of their personality rather than looks (and most of the time, gender). I have to admit, I was "homophobic" for quite a while; now THAT was the phase I was going through.
I haven't spoken to my dad about it, and I don't plan to. We don't have much of a REALLY strong father-son like bond, and yet we do. Odd, I know.
But, as I told my mum, I will only go by what suits my tastes, and I won't go by what others tell me.
BTW: I keep wondering why parents who try to restrain their children from becoming interested in the same sex...mostly end up with them being that way. It's funny, actually. XD And yet, oh so very angering at the same exact time. Trying to restrain their own children from what is around them and trying to get them to be ignorant is total bewl shiat. DX
((I apologize for any typos.))
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Posted: Mon Sep 18, 2006 10:37 am
~GirlxPride~ I'd be dead if I came out to my parents. >.< I wish I could, but it would not turn out well. My mom suspected me of being a lesbian (when I started spending more time than usual with my ex because she thought she was just a friend to me then >.>) and she went on and off about it... sometimes yelling at me and sometimes making subtle hints, but I never gave myself away. I don't know if she still does, but this is my mom and I'll never know. sweatdrop
oddspongeout- If you're looking for a good dodge, I highly recommend the "Well, I have a friend who's gay..." It's very effective and very believable. XD
Kitsune- Yeah, my mom asks me about boys all the time. I'm usually the one who instigates comments about girls. But she's mostly asking out of curiosity, I think.
Natsuki- Wow...well, at least she knows something about it? And I guess from your description that she's letting you go rather than harassing you about it. And also, XD on that last bit!
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Posted: Mon Sep 18, 2006 1:46 pm
I could never, ever come out to my parents. They're conservative Christians and would try to "fix me," I'm sure, and I'm terrified of that happening to me. I have a good cover--a few friends of mine (all straight but me XD) and I are all married, you see. I have two wives, of which I am the first and my lovely Erin is the second. Brittany is the main wife, so she gets to choose the consorts. Erin and I are permitted to have relationships with the consorts, but we can't choose them ourselves. Hence, a great cover story--pretend you're just kidding.
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Posted: Mon Sep 18, 2006 5:30 pm
>_o well..my mom knows i'm like...a little bi-ish..after my brother kicked me out..=__+'
but she doesn't try to hook me up with guys, she doesn't even talk about it or hint it...@_@ well...she does complain about my whole closet filled with guy clothes...but other than that she doesn't talk about it..^^'
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Posted: Tue Sep 19, 2006 12:41 pm
Well, my mom is totally cool, and not homophobic at all. But she is always pointing how cute boys are, to me, a lot. ^^
I'm always kind of hinting that I'm not that interested in boys, she's probably noticed, but I'm kind of weird, so she might just think I'm being super shy. But she does that, "Isn't he cute?" thing to me a lot.
Once at the beach, she was pointing out some guy to me, and I'm like, "... okay. And?"
Another time, we were at a drive-threw, and after we got our food, she turns around and asks if I thought the guy at the window was cute.
Me: Mom, I'm only sixteen, I have no interest in boys, and I won't until... uh, I'm twenty-one.
When we were going to someone's party one time, she says, "Charlotte, I want you to go dance with some boys."
Me: ...I don't want to dance with boys.
Mom: Well, you can dance with a girl if you like.
Me: ........... I.... I don't want to dance at all.
I was kind of surprised she said that. XD But I really didn't want to dance with anyone. XD
And the other day, I was going on about something (I've forgotten XD) And my mom says (in front of my sister and brother too)...
Mom: Are you queer? Since you seem to like gay people a lot, and talk about them all the time...
*awkward silence* 3... 2.. 1..
Me: Ahahaha, what? No, no! I'm not, I just like how they're normally more open-minded than others! I love open-minded people! Haha..
Whut, four examples, but you kind of get the idea. XD But she probably knows I'm a bit... bent that way. She wouldn't mind, I think, but... I'd still rather not say anything for now. XD (Since my brother and sister are kind of... :/) Though until then, she's still going to do that, "He's cute, right?" thing... ^^ And, my dad doesn't live with us, so he's not a problem.
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Posted: Tue Sep 19, 2006 6:27 pm
kageling
Natsuki- Wow...well, at least she knows something about it? And I guess from your description that she's letting you go rather than harassing you about it. And also, XD on that last bit!
I'm so glad I'll have a low chance of becoming a parent. I won't have to worry about telling the child the difference of "wrong from right" and confuse the hell out of them. @ w @
Rikkai- Aren't you the fortunate one? >3 Kiddin', kiddin'. I'm happy for ya. XD My mother and I haven't come to such a level in our mother-daughter relationship. ; 3; I admire yours with your mother! T 3T
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Posted: Wed Sep 20, 2006 2:50 am
kageling Kitsune- Yeah, my mom asks me about boys all the time. I'm usually the one who instigates comments about girls. But she's mostly asking out of curiosity, I think.
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