Don't Help Me, Release Me
Age: 15-16
I feel it deep inside me
It claws and screams, it threatens me
Dwelling deep within my core
Yet lingering just below the skin
Reaching to the outside world
Wanting to be known and feared
Only bound to me by my flesh
Wishing to break forth, in our horror
But never shall it be released from me
So it drives me to insanity
Its heartbeat's now in sync with mine
As if it's trying to mimic me
I cry for help but none is brought
So everyone just calls me crazy
When all I want is some release
Some way of sanity to bring me peace
But it has a hold inside of me
As it spreads like an infection
Poisoning my mind and soul
Until it finally has control
It sees through my eyes like window panes
Like a wicked child plotting revenge
And nothing can be done but what it pleases
When I close my eyes, it's all I see
As it smirks and laughs, cold-heartedly
This deep, sick feeling that I get in my gut
Has left me to live with nothing
But frequent sickening, sleepless nights
And startling visions when I sleep
But I'm beginning to feel that this is more like me...
I'm only but a human puppet now
A marionette of bone and blood
And this master that loves to pull my strings
Only wishes to make me do what I know is wrong
I writhe and seethe to try to break free
And still he keeps control of me
In mind and body making me insincere
Into what I have always feared
An impurity against the ones I love
To make me feel like a human glove
I fear that its all I can do now
To be the masochist under its master
To let it take me under and drown me
I'm not needing to fight these feelings any longer
There is no purpose when you're fighting yourself
So you see my fellow peers that shy and shun away
When you see me walking among you in the corridors,
With my bloody, broken body and stitched up smile
You're only watching as the movie of my life runs its last reel
As what you watch disappear what was left that was real...
If only you'd just released me.....
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