Welcome to Gaia! ::

Yeah, this is basically happening cause I'm bored and NO ONE is even posting here, so let's try to change that, shall we?

I wrote a journal entry a long time ago, named "The Page Editing Safari" and posted it in my journal. The original topic follows this sentence:



Now that you have read (more or less, skipped) the journal entry, I would like to know if anyone would like to be a part of "The Page Editing Safari - Part 2". If you're new, I'll take your name and personality and twist it into something funny and slightly unoffensive.

If I have already done you, you can request a more thorough article on you, including your species, habits, "history", and what not.

Just post here with your request, and please leave all the creative junk up to me, including the names. I need to be makin' my own material, dawgs. That's just how I fly.

- General Information

A. Population numbers

The Defendasauris158 is a common animal, with about 158 of its kind still alive. This makes it the most populated animal on earth, for 158 is the greatest number of all; even greater than Number One, who is the star of Kids Next Door. (Kids Next Door was once a popular kids show that was shown on Nick Jr. and the hospital channel until the Witch Hunts began In America. It was suspected of being a witch and was tested accordingly.)

B. Location and Origin

The specific living quarters of the Defendasauris158 is "that one place", a.k.a. the Farley Grey Safari. This is true, unless you count "GaiaOnline", "Florida (pronounced Floor-i(t)-DUH)", or "Chuck-e-Cheeses" as a place.

There are two theories of the Defendasauris158's origins:

1. The Defendasauris158 originated in from a bottle of Grapefruit juice that Elvis Presley opened when he was just a little girl. Silly Elvis then put it in the freezer (called the "Big Block-o-Ice Box" back then) and left it there for 5 thousand years before coming back and drinking it all at once, thus dying of Grapefruit overdose.

2. The Defendasauris158 came about in 1992 when two grapefruits rubbed together making sweet music. This music became very popular among the populous when leaked onto the radio, thus starting a new wave of music. Unfortunately, this wave formed into a typhoon and wiped out half of the world. The half of the world I'm referring to is the "Urup" and "Ashia" hemisphere. The other half, the "amireka" and "candiduh" hemisphere, was spared.

C. History

The history of the Defendasauris158 is unknown, cause no one really cares that much. Not your mom, not your dad, not even your Uncle Sam. NO ONE CARES. So stop crying.

D. Love Life

This creature has an unnatural obsession with DDR (or, as we professionals call it, a "Love Interest") and has attempted to mate with it many times. Even though the mating was unsuccessful (to this date), the Defendasauris158 has passed every song on Very Hard Mode in Dance Dance Revolution: Cake Mix. He did this by repeatably stepping on the board with one foot.

The Defendasauris158 also mated with the color blue to get back at DDR for not conceiving its babies. This ultimately resulted in the making of Blue Dragon, the Blue Hedgehog, Sonic, and Marth's hair. This also led to Defendasauris158 falling in love with the color blue.

- Subsection A: Mating Rituals

See "Dancing", "Hitchhiking", or "The Dummies Guide to Opening a Can".

- Biography of That one Defendasauris158 that we all Know and Love

A. Childhood

The Defendasauris158 grew up in the tyranny empire of Chuck-e-Cheese, ran by Chuck-e, the mouse. When Defendasauris158 was five, he was forced into training so that, in the future, he may work as the guy who impersonates Chuck-e, thus taking control of the whole empire. To do this, Defendasauris158 went through vigorous war training until he was thirteen, being trained by Yoda. The training would've ended when Defendasauris158 was seven, but Yoda's Russian Reversals confused him, adding another six years to the training schedule.

B. The Chuck-e-Cheese and 158 War (and Defendasauris158's involvement in it)

Shortly after his thirteenth birthday, Defendasauris158 confronted the cheese loving mouse himself with an army of 5 soldiers. These soldiers' names are as follows:

1. Jet Li
2. Chuck Norris
3. Jackie Chan
4. Christopher Rock
5. Jesus

The mouse came with an army of five. These fives soldiers can be identified as the stars of the first Power Rangers series, but we prefer to call them Hank, Homer, Dante, Pinky, and the brain.

After a close, cheesy battle filled with 70s music and the "BOING!" sound, Defendasauris158 was victorious. However, his five troops died during the war due to a close-counters nuclear explosion. They all blocked Defedasauris158 from the blast, and, when dying, cursed themselves, seeing as the blast was only five feet in length (later measures show that it was only 5 cms).

Defendasaruis158 took control of the empire, renaming it the "158 Empire", and killed his master, Yoda. This caused a riot, started by the Star Wars fans within the 158 empire who thought the murderer of their beloved green imp was the Green Goblin, a close friend of Defendasauris158. The Green Goblin was, reportedly, racist against imps. He was also, reportedly, a member of the GGG (the Glub Glux Gland), an Imp-hating cult.

Even though Defendasauris158 was clueless of this, he was overthrown just five days after the murder, due to the empire losing all of its soldiers during the Chuck-e-Cheese and 158 War. The Green Goblin was later captured and was forced to eat green beans, green-greens, and the Green Eyed Peas.

C. Livin' in Exile

That crazy Defendasauris158 is resided in an Old folk's Home in the Sun Deprived state of Florida, currently located on Mars, after the war. He was forced to the Planet Mars for a year, due to whole "taking over an empire thing". Oddly enough, all the Star Wars fans of the 158 Empire, now known as the Empire (not to be confused with EVERY OTHER empire out there, this one is special; it has LEZURZ!), never found out about Defendasauris158's role in the death of Yoda, and they never will!

This did not keep Defendasauris158 from receiving a slightly exaggerated punishment, though. His sentence was one full year of "helping Stella get her groove back". This proved harder than it appeared, seeing as Stella wasn't even alive, nor did she ever exist. So, Defendasauris158 ended up cleaning all the bathrooms in the Empire for one full week. This placed horrible memories deep within Defendasauris158's subconscious; memories he would carry with him forever. Memories that made him want to KILL.

Despite this, Defendasauris158 continues to live a normal, and awfully destructive, life in the Farley Grey Safari, blowing things up with Demon Pilot (now known as 'P I L O T) to his heart's content.

- The Happy Ending

Due to the nuclear radiation of 'P I L O T and Defendasauris158's nuclear explosions, everyone dies and the world becomes the perfect area for Defendasauris158s, 'P I L O Ts, and World War 2 shooters to roam, happy and free. Stench free, that is.

Way to go, jerks.

Does that mean you want an extended article too?

Oh, and your article is done, Nick.

Yep.

exclaim

Oh, this should be good.

Gimme a minute, I need to go get some popcorn.

Edit: (Do one on Zack next, please.)

Edit 2: (Though I guess I should ask him, first. I'll get right on that.)

Edit 3: Yes, my edits will now be multicolored.

EDIT: Are you people crazy?

Edit 4: That last edit wasn't mine. Who did it, and how didn't it show up in the crew activity log? I'm not mad, just curious. (Though that was against the rules.)

Sorry, my parents took me on a surprise cruise. So, I'm won't be able to start the article until after the exams on Monday.

Be patient 'til then.

What about the classic "hold your breath until your face turns purple" move?

Besides, that's laaaaaaaaame.