i dont know why looking at old pictures always makes me sad.
i was looking at my friends myspace and i starting thinking bout how great friends we were. she was like my sister. we did everything together. but we didnt stay friends. we drifted apart. we never talk anymore. it makes me sad. shes friends with hella my friends from west. people i talk to all the time. but i never talk to her. i miss how close we were. i guess i kinda feel...replaced. not needed.
it makes me lonely as hell. thinking like this. and then i start thinking bout my friends now. what if they replace me too? i couldnt take it. i worry too much bout being forgotten. if i lose aubrey, or bre, or any of the group, the way i lost michelle. and i guess something else that makes me sad is my friends are always talking bout what happened last time they were hanging out together. and how it was too bad i wasnt there. i feel like i miss everything. and what if they get tired of waiting for me to be able to hang out. and we just stop talking.
i feel this way bout kryss too. i love him more than anything and i want to always be with him but what if he doesnt want me? he says he does and that he always will but what if he changes his mind. i mean we are only 16. u cant expect something to last forever. no matter how much u want it to. and u cant make a promise like that at 16 even if u believe u can keep it. theres no way to kno for sure. how will he feel about me in 5 years? or 10? if he meets someone who he is more interested in, who he loves more? if he just gets bored of being with me.
and dont tell me im wrong that it will never happen. because there is always a chance that it will....
i was looking at my friends myspace and i starting thinking bout how great friends we were. she was like my sister. we did everything together. but we didnt stay friends. we drifted apart. we never talk anymore. it makes me sad. shes friends with hella my friends from west. people i talk to all the time. but i never talk to her. i miss how close we were. i guess i kinda feel...replaced. not needed.
it makes me lonely as hell. thinking like this. and then i start thinking bout my friends now. what if they replace me too? i couldnt take it. i worry too much bout being forgotten. if i lose aubrey, or bre, or any of the group, the way i lost michelle. and i guess something else that makes me sad is my friends are always talking bout what happened last time they were hanging out together. and how it was too bad i wasnt there. i feel like i miss everything. and what if they get tired of waiting for me to be able to hang out. and we just stop talking.
i feel this way bout kryss too. i love him more than anything and i want to always be with him but what if he doesnt want me? he says he does and that he always will but what if he changes his mind. i mean we are only 16. u cant expect something to last forever. no matter how much u want it to. and u cant make a promise like that at 16 even if u believe u can keep it. theres no way to kno for sure. how will he feel about me in 5 years? or 10? if he meets someone who he is more interested in, who he loves more? if he just gets bored of being with me.
and dont tell me im wrong that it will never happen. because there is always a chance that it will....
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