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Why is it that if you have long black hair and wear dark clothing everyone thinks you torture small animals and worship the devil? I may seem depressed alot of the time, but that doesn't mean I'm some psycho just waiting for my chance to kill everyone...of course I doubt if anyone's going to believe that, reading some of my rants... stare Having repressed anger problems and disliking a lot of people does not mean I want to kill everyone. I think people are full of themselves for even thinking they're worth the effort. There's no way I'm going to get myself locked in prison just because they're annoying people who get their kicks out of annoying me. And now I g2g so that's it...

When I was a freshman, I had no friends. One person was nice to me, and I decided to hang out with her, telling her things about myself and my likings. I suppose that there is nothing wrong with making friends with someone and sharing interests, indeed that very thing is actually one of the main reasons I've survived my own angst for so long. However, when someone has the creative intelligence of a rock, and is so desperate to fit in with someone, anyone, that they mimic everything you do thinking it will make you like them, it's pathetic. I'm way too nice, I don't have the heart to tell people to go ******** off because they act retarded. Actually I could probably do so now, because I have become very callous, and easily set off.

I'm probably being too harsh, I'm probably being cruel, I'm now past the point of caring. She was nice, but she was the most naiive misinformed person I have ever known, and she has little aptitude for finding things on her own. I'm sorry Mandy, but you are annoying. I hate to be so mean, but it's the truth, from what I've seen you have not changed at all in the past four years. Conversely, I've gone from 'desperately wanting anyone to befriend me' to 'unless you manage to get extremely close to me and jump amazingly high hurdles, don't even talk to me' I'm cruel now. Anger, resentment, sociophobia, depression, disgust, all those things run through me now. I'm not a scared little freshman who has just had his selfestem torn to shreds. I am a tortured soul, stretched taut and full of broiling emotion. I"ll get better in timeI think, but right now, I'm not a very nice person anymore. Still I'm too nice just to tell someone who annoys the living christ out of me, "******** off, and get a brain"