|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 11:49 am
Calopterynx hmmm, that's a toughy. Well, in my opinion it's best to let the guy make the first move. If he's not up to admitting he likes you, then he probably doesn't feel too strongly about it. On the other hand, he might just be trying to distance himself because you moved away. If you moved really far (like no chance of seeing him on the weekends far) then maybe you should hold off on telling him because it's probably going to be pretty painful for you two to be separated if you both admit to having feelings for each other. But if you're not too far, maybe you could call him up and ask if he'd like to hang out sometime, maybe even with a group of friends... and see how it goes. If he keeps up contact after that (make sure he gets your cell number wink ) then he's probably interested, and will probably ask you out himself. hmm that would be a good idea if we weren't a 6-7 hour car drive away and if we had the same friends i tend to make friends in all sorts of groups that really wouldn't understand eachother but i highly doubt he likes me i say we all just put me out of my misery
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 3:13 pm
if i were you, i probably wouldn't say anything in that case. the best advice i can give is to find something to preoccupy your time so you won't have a moment to miss him. or, better yet, poor out your feelings in art/poetry/music or whatever you want...usually when i'm in a bad mood i make really awesome stuff. so try to make something positive out of it. good luck!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2008 3:16 pm
Perhaps he's a bit shy, I believe it's getting harder to get boys to make the first moves and if you don't throw hints a little now and then he might never get around to it. He might think that you just think of him as a friend. Usually these situations are quite tough to be in as it would feel like "win all or lose all" and once your feelings are out you can't just take them back. Even though the risk of losing is minimal it's still uncomfortable that there is a risk at all. I'm currently in such a situation myself with my best friend. It's tough since we're literally several thousand miles apart and we spend alot of time together online. Thing is that she and I are both very introverted and neither of us throw distinct hints or show signs of affection, also I believe we're both rather satisfied with the way things are, perhaps we're also afraid things wouldn't work out well. So I can't really tell you what to do.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2008 4:20 pm
oo, yeah i totally agree with mattea, guys are becoming more and more shy...I'm not sure why (lol no rhyme intended), but it may have something to do with how forward girls are becoming. Guys are becoming dependent on the fact girls will be more upfront about their feelings. So why chance it when they don't have to? Personally, I don't really like this change of events because it puts me in the position of making the first move (and i'm a chicken lol), but I guess guys had to deal with this for centuries...so maybe us girls are getting a taste of our own medicine (?) I don't know...but anyway, do whatever you want riosuu, but be prepared to make peace with his feelings about you (whether good or not-so-good).
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2008 5:39 pm
uhg
you're right
damn extreme feminists
but telling him over the web when i haven't even talked with him in a long while is pretty wierd
and then i don't have the guts to tell him myself
frick
but ppl are always goin that i'm completely obvious about my feelings
even those i don't know
but everyone knows i'm completely insane and that might be why my friends find it hard to read me
but...
ugh!
before I had to move we were starting to sync
we even unconciously copied eachother's habbits
well...some of them sweatdrop
but then no word
gah!
guys confuzzle me
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jan 18, 2008 11:00 am
AH! STOP! *screeching brake sounds* Ill voice my opinion, since i think a guy's opinion is utterly invaluable here.
What i thinkwill either be totally relavent, or totally irrelavent, depending if you act on it or not. What i think is that he is scared of asking you out (if he is thinking of it.) Chances are, if you've been growing that close and being that friendly, he will be interested in you like that on some level, its probably almost definte.
He likes you. Thats a given. So its set like that regardless of the choices. Here are the options, reasons and results i see:
1. He is scared of asking you out because you two are suchgood friends already he thinks that if he asks you if you want to go out and you dont, then he has just ruined everything you had. That is why he wouldnt have asked you. If you think this is stupid then fair enough, but uhm.... sweatdrop ive been in that kind of position ><' Thats how i felt when i was going to ask out he girl im with now ><
If you ask him out now, or just make it plainly obvious, then things should be great! Thats if he wants go go out with you, which it sounds like.
2. He doesnt want to go out with you but still feels really close to you. If you ask him out and he doesnt want things to go like that, then it sounds like things would be ok anyways. If you guys are such good friends anyway then you'll be able to laugh about it after a while anyway ^^
This is my opinion, i hope it will be usefull in some way or another.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jan 18, 2008 3:23 pm
thanks Wnx
you sound like the male version of me
lol
only you have more guts sweatdrop
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jan 18, 2008 3:34 pm
No problem ^^
And how do i sound like you? But i dont see myself as being very gutsy XD
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jan 18, 2008 4:13 pm
because i'm afraid of ruining the friendship
and i've never once told anyone that i'd liked them
and i've known friends who liked me but i didn't feel the same so i kept quiet and acted ignorant
...
lol
maybe your explination sounded like me
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Jan 18, 2008 4:30 pm
Good, i suppose that way it would be easier to relate to and possibly take advice from or certain guidelines ^^
Before i asked my girlfriend out, we became close friends first. Im lucky in that respect because my girlfriend is also my friend, if you see what i mean. So before we started going out, i kept going over things in my head if i should ask her out or not. What would she say? Was i being stupid? Did she actually like me like that? Would i destroy everything we built up if it went badly? In the end i lucked out, in a strange way, because still to this day, neither one of use has asked the other out. We walked to the train station together that day and taked things over and both realised what was going on: We were thinking the exact same things, and we make to a mutrual understnding and just ended up going out without asking one another.
Its a strange stry i guess but it can show you just how funny things can turn out.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Mon Jan 28, 2008 7:12 pm
yarg, i know what you mean Riosuu...i haven't actually ever had to admit to a guy that i liked them either sweatdrop ...i like to stay in my comfort zone. But i really don't recommend being like me lol. i think Wnx has a good point (especially since he's a guy lol), what's the worst that could happen if you do tell him how you feel? He can either say yes or no, and since you two live so far away, that takes the pressure off having to see him at school or something and having any awkward moments.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jan 29, 2008 6:26 pm
Haha Thanks Cal XD
But yeh, *nods silently* and even so, whatever happens it would seem likely that the both of you would still remain on good terms with each other.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2008 4:20 pm
Riosuu Meh. i'm not gonna take ppls advice because i'm too much of a coward to do so but i thought i'd like to hear what you ppl have to say. I like one of my friends. I've liked him since I met him (didn't really know at the time) when I was acting like I usually do with everyone and pointing the edge of my folder next to his eye to see what he would do and he just went into it and smiled. So then I started talking to him because I thought he'd be a cool person to hang out with. And then I started to get to know him really well and liking him a lot longer than my usual fleeting crushes. Then I had to move for almost a year without any contact. And I thought the feeling had finally gone away. But I went back and when I saw him again my heart just raced. And we smiled and joked and got into little arguments (because I have mood swings) and even I started noticing how close we were getting. My friend told me a girl had asked her if he and I were going out. I thought: "Oh crap. Am I really that obvious?" My friend said that she didn't notice at first. That I hid it really well and she only had a feeling when I told her (which was durring the summer after 9th I think). I guess I couldn't really hide myself this time. But now I've had to move away again. And he never contacts me. And I've tried to contact him. And I truly do think my case is hopeless. Would it be worth the risk of being utterly devistated just to see how he really feels? Personally, I think it is worth the risk. But you also have to do what you're comfortable with. If it's not time to ask him how he feels, then don't push it. But if you're far away from him anyway, I dunno... that's a tough call. Also, do you think he'd return your feelings?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2008 4:22 pm
Also, I'm bumping this thread up to 'sticky' status. It's a great idea.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Sat Feb 02, 2008 3:32 pm
Frogsnack Also, I'm bumping this thread up to 'sticky' status. It's a great idea. Thanks Frog blaugh This is my first sticky ever WOOT!
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
