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 Posted: Tue Jul 31, 2007 9:47 am
It's true, after years of leisurely holding it together its finalling falling apart. I feared this day would come and it has now arrived. It began small, with minute headaches here and there on some days while on others there were blinding searing affairs that left me deaf and blind to the light. But little by little they chip away at my whole, at the main core of my defensive whole. I find I can no longer think straight and its nearly impossible to make decisions anymore, let alone even decide what to wear on any given day. Its rather frustrating and I dont really know what to do about it. But the worse it gets the slower I become, like doing water polo through honey.I know taking my depression medicine might help, but then again it might not have any effect at all. But more importantly, it takes too much effort to find it.
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Posted: Fri Aug 03, 2007 11:18 pm
heart hugs heart
Feel like sharing some of those meds? The last 1/2 of July has just been awful for me. I've had days where all I wanted to do was just stay in bed. If it weren't for work, a couple of appointments, and the need for bathroom breaks, I probably would have. I wasn't in pain, just no motivation. Most of the time when I was active, I felt like a Zombie, just going through the motions of the day, just so I could go back to bed. It really sucks.
I've been trying to find something to look forward to in the day. Today it was the movie "300" that my bf just bought. Tomorrow, I have to get some stuffed critters made and sort through my nick-nacks for carnival items. Last week, I met my sisters for a pop (since I can no longer have alcohol xp ) Just something to make the day a little different, that gets me away from the mundane, and a break from the problems that I can't find solutions for.
I hope you will be ok. Is there anyone you can talk to about how you are feeling, or maybe a friend to help you get through this?
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Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 6:51 am
As for the meds, I've got plenty...you can have them since there arent enough hours in the day for me to actually take them all and not look like I just crawled beneath a train wreck. And yeah, I can relate to the lack of motivation, I used to sleep all day long until my mom started making an issue of it and making me get up during the day. When I work it helps, but I havent worked in a while. As for someone to talk to, well no one wants to listen, and the one person who says that I just need to find a boyfriend...
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Posted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 10:29 pm
heart Hugs heart
That's all I can do right now. I know its not much, but if I were near you in real life, I'd give you a BIG one if you'd let me, then sit and listen to you. For now, I shall listen by reading your words.
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Posted: Tue Aug 07, 2007 11:27 pm
I'm with Raeden.
We may not be able to hear you, or respond as quickly as someone sitting beside you. But typing out those pains and frustrations might help give you some release. Maybe even a chance to look at things differently, and offer ways to make things better for yourself.
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