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Kyle Rei Basil
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PostPosted: Tue Jul 31, 2007 10:18 pm


This is random. But you can post any jokes you wnat here. I just posted this one in another guild.

Ok, you guys may not think it's very funny, and it requires some guessing. And you'll probably want to kill me in the end, for all I know some of you already have heard it. PM me if you want the answer, some people might get mad if I tell the answer before they can guess...

The Monk Joke


There's a young boy going to college. You know how parents are, rearranging the house while their kids are away at college. Well anyway, things aren't going so well for the kid at college so he drops out and goes home and tells his father, whose a monk "I'm sorry dad, things just weren't working out at college do you mind if I stay here for awhile?" The father shakes his head "Not at all son, though I rearranged the house while you were gone, so my room is now your room and vice-versa." The son doesn't mind and that night goes to his new room to sleep. A light tapping and scratching is heard against the wall. The son sits up and looks out the window. You see the only thing outside that wall is the night sky, no tree's or anything. So you can imagine his confusion when there is nothing on the other side of the window. Regardless of this fact the tapping and scratching continues. He ignores it and tries his best to get a good nights rest and decides to ask his father about it in the morning.

The next morning he very sleepily asks his father "Last night there was a tapping and scratching sound on the wall in my room, since it was yours I was wondering if you could tell me what it was?" His father shakes his head sadly "I'm sorry son, I'd tell you but your not a monk." His son sighs "Look dad I know you want me to be a monk and all but I'm just not into it." The son figures he'll just put up with it, that night when he goes to bed there is aloud banging noise from that wall. He checks the window and once again nothing is on the other side. He goes to his father the next morning, a little worse for wear. "Dad, that noise got louder, you have to tell me what it is?" His father just shakes his head sadly again "I'm sorry son, but I can't tell you, your not a monk."

So once again the son decides to put up with it seeing as he doesn't want to become a monk. A few days later the sound excalates to a loud "WHOO-HOOH- HOOing!" plus the banging and the scratching and the tapping. The by now very tired son goes to his father "Look dad, I haven't been able to get any sleep at all because of that noise, can you please tell me what it is?" His father once again just shakes is bald little head and looks at him with sad eyes "I'm sorry son, but I just can't tell you." The son, finally fed up shouts "Fine! I'll do the darn monk training but only one year, that should be enough to tell me what that noise is!" He goes through his first year of monk training and learns chants, martial arts, meditation and what ever else monks learn at the first year of monk training.

After his first year of monk training the boy goes home and say "Ok dad, that's one year, can you tell me what that noise is?" His father just shakes his head. The boy goes to bed that night to the lullaby of tapping and scratching. The next morning he goes to his father and ask once more. His father sighs "You've only had one year of training that is still not enough." The boy puts up with the noise for two weeks as it builds to it's cressondo before he finally gives in and goes back to the temple for the seond year of monk training. He learns healing techniques, levitation, how to walk on water, and other monk like things. He goes home "Ok dad, that's two years, can you tell me what that noise is?" His father once again shakes his head. So the boy puts up with the noise.

By the end of his fourth week home, the boys eyes are blood shot and there are dark circles under his eyes. He begs his father "Please, just tell me what that noise is, I'll do anything?!?!?!" His father smiels sadly once again and shakes his head "I'm sorry son, but the only way for you to find out is to complete your third and final year of monk training." With a cry of frustration the boy sets out for his last year of monk training. He learns how to transcend the heaves, the border between life and death, and how to speak to god. He comes home with a smile on his face "Alright dad, I'm finally a monk, can you please tell me what that noise is?" His father sighs "You still need to complete your pilgrimage." Not seeing the harm now that he's already a monk he asks his father what he has to do. His father smiles "You need to go on a long journey to a library to enlighten your self and find a book that will tell you the secret that lies behind that wall."

The boy goes on this journey and begins to read the books in the library. He learns many things that he had never known before. Finally he reaches the last book. A little red, leather-bound book covered in dust and cobwebs. He pulls it from the shelf and promptly falls through a trap door.

After standing from his awkward position on the ground he looks around. On the far wall are three doors.


-Half way point-

The first door is blue, the seond door is yellow, and the very last door is red. With a shrug he says "Well blue is my favorite color, so I'll go through that door." He opens the door and goes in. He blinks. The room is incredibly long and leads to an even longer set of steps. So he starts towards the steps. After a while he notices a soft "ssssssssssssttttt" noise. He looks around and see's nothing so he just keeps walking. Soon he notices his shoes are getting heavey and wet, he looks down only to realize the room below is filling up with water fast. He books it up the stairs and out the door at the top. In front of him once again stands doors, only two this time. One is yellow and the other is red.

He says to himself "Well yellow is a nice color, so I'll go through that one." He goes through the yellow door, and just like the room before, it is long and the stairs even longer. He starts to make his way through. Once again he notices a soft "ssssssssssssttttt" noise. He looks around and see's nothing. So he continues on. Once again his shoes become quite heavy. He looks down and notices the room below is filling up with sand! He empties his shoes and runs quickly to the door at the top of the stairs. With a sigh he looks at the opposite wall than smacks himself. Red book, red door DUH!

He goes through the door with a smile on his face. Once again that ominesce (sp?) sound plays out "ssssssssssssttttt". He looks around, only this time he really looks. He finds nothing and continues on his way. After awhile he notices his body is beginning to feel very heavy. The room is filling up with poisonous gas! With as much power and speed as he can muster he runs to the doors at the top of the stairs. He throws it open and into the next room where he then throws open the window and takes big gulps of air until he's feeling much better. He looks around only to spot a golden door and a silver chest. He opens the chest only to find a golden key inside.

He uses the key to open the door, and on the other side is the things that had been making the noise all along.

Ok, you can guess... only I've thought about it, just send me the guesses in a PM too. Don't want to block up anymore of this thread.
PostPosted: Wed Aug 01, 2007 1:34 pm


I know that anyone who hasn't read this will try to kill you.

Toxic_Plague
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Akemi Shizunda

PostPosted: Wed Aug 01, 2007 4:08 pm


You just had to put this joke up didn't you?
PostPosted: Wed Aug 08, 2007 1:50 pm


Loud, mad, or sad


The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health and was giving an oral test.

Speaking specifically about manic depression, she asked, "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute, then sits in a chair weeping uncontrollably the next?"

A young man in the rear raised his hand and answered, "A basketball coach?"

Hikari Kazuma


KomoriRei
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PostPosted: Mon Dec 03, 2007 4:05 pm


Mines up in the 'Songs' thread. cool Please go check it out!
PostPosted: Thu Jan 03, 2008 3:48 pm


OK I got one!

There once was a man named Odd and he was sick of people saying"Your names odd buy thats odd!"And making fun of him for his name.He was harrassed about it all his life. Finally he got married and had children he told his wife.That when he died to put nothing on his head stone except the date of his birth and the date of his death.So he wouldn`t have to deal with the humiliation of his name. To this day when people pass his headstone they say."Boy thats Odd."

KomoriRei
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Daiuske Imora

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 01, 2008 8:05 pm


Q: What do you get when you pass Acheron and a pack of Daimons?

A: A really big dust pan.
PostPosted: Tue Dec 02, 2008 8:24 am


That's a cute joke Daisuke.

Kyle Rei Basil
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Daiuske Imora

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 02, 2008 4:33 pm


Thank you.
PostPosted: Thu Dec 11, 2008 4:31 pm


I like it too...

okay here's one...

Three elephants fall off of a cliff, two land on the ground and one lands in the water... ba - dump - pish...

(if you don't understand it is okay... )that last bit is an onomatopoeia, say it out loud and you will get it...

<3 Brandon

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