Welcome to Gaia! ::

blue = jailed
red = killed
number next to name = rounds inactive
cyan = inactive.



1. Fortenra Askasa (7)
2. `Aine Chievious
3. Chikorin Moonie (6, 7, 8 )
4. iPocky` (6, 7, 8 )
5. [Cherry.Wine] (4, 6, 9, 10, 12)
6. Joey Sohma (12)
7. The Ti Chan
8. Forced Anonymous
9. Anael De Ezra
10. Egotistical Moose
11. Vlad D. Tepes (7, 8, 12)
12. Kitty Krazy (7)
13. Mercain (1) - Dark News Reporter
14. Azrael Makar (3) - Light News Reporter
15. Meiko_Michan (1)
16. Insomnesiac
17. Merumiharu
18. Merriweather
19. `Kashi (6, 9)
20. A Dragonflys Sin (12)
21. Panda Pocky (1, 5)
22. HDogXero (2, 12)
23. inasanemonkey1230 (4)
24. Draconissa
25. MonJ (2)
26. numinous decay (1)
27. Zanaroo
28. TootsieFruity (7, 8 )
29. Roy Salamandra
30. Merty
31. Sieg Reyu.2 (1, 2)
32. Tedie Behr (11, 12) - Sniperville G-Team
33. `Christa (10, 13)
34. Ginny Amidala of Hobbiton (8, 13)
35. Sae25
36. Wrendraith (8 )
37. Lady Rai (10, 11)
38. Malignant Mushrooms (6, 9, 11)
39. Amigo_amigo_amigo
40. Kiyo_Michan (1)
41. Sibeiko
42. K I N G S H O Y (5)
43. ` l e x i i (6, 7)
44. Sylfaen (1, 2)
45. s a x e
46. Verhika
47. Hirun Hikari (1, 4, 5, 8 )
48. Otakkun - Crazy Town G team
49. Spontaneous-Spork (1, 3, 4, 5)
50. Heart Shaped Toastie (9)
51. The Only Taven (1, 4, 7, 11, 12)
52. Ginji The Beat Crusader
53. Return_of_Watanuki-San (5, 6, 9)
54. [Q] (5)
55. Kheyre the Shining knight
56. Roger Silverwood
57. Real Sex (2)
58. [N]ymphie (5, 6, 7)

Players Remaining:
23. inasanemonkey1230 (4)
27. Zanaroo
36. Wrendraith (8 )
50. Heart Shaped Toastie (9)


So, at this point, it's IMPOSSIBLE to win. It's not impossible to jail the right person though. Just guess and hope you're lucky?

Dearest CK,

Do you like that abbreviation there? CK? I felt right clever. Anyway, jumping into things - You read TIME magazine? Why? Weird bloke. Also, you shouldn't scream about me in public. Unless you're publicly gay, then it's alright. Are you? I'm sorry, that was rude. Please still answer it though.

I was FLOORED to get your letter (I love that term. Floored. Like I can be swept and vacuumed). It was like Christmas, except less snow and happy kids. So like a better Christmas. Now I feel like Scrooge, hating kids and happiness. Goddamn. Back on the subject, I'm very happy you've decided to take up killing again, I don't feel quite so lonely now. Please tell my though, WHY you couldn't just use my knife? I understand that there are billions of puns to make out of killing someone with a phone called a Razr, but I sent you that knife with love! Can't you just go stab someone so I don't feel so useless or stupid? Bah Humbug.

Ohoh I sniped Forced Anonymous today. It was hot. No, literally, it was a hot day so I was like "I shall go swimming!" Except I didn't think that through very well because I showed up at that one pool, and I realized I was wearing my black cloak and my rifle was tucked away in it. Don't ask how I didn't notice that, please. Anyway, Forced Anonymous was the only one in the pool, and here I am, with my rifle and cloak, all set, so it was like BLAM! Dead. And then I kinda left, so I didn't get caught. And then I passed the pool later today, and there was a sign that read "POOL'S CLOSED due to bullets" and I thought that was just amazing. Now I need to stalk that pool and shoot everyone who goes near, so the pool stays closed because of bullets.

So, I look forward to getting your letter and hearing about how you skinned someone WITH THE KNIFE I SENT YOU. Because it is a very nice knife and at least I didn't send you a rifle.

Best regards,
Sniper.

Scrooge,

First of all, I did NOT use your knife. HA. No really, I'm sorry but I had this AMAZING idea that makes it all alright because you're going to love it too, believe me. So what I did is I waited for the guy, Roy Salamandra, to come out of the shower. No, I am NOT a pervert. It all makes sense later. So when he got out dressed in a towel the opening of the door caused a bucket with super-quick-drying superglue to fall on his head. Now everyone would be surprised to suddenly have a bucket stuck to your head, so he yelled and got some of the glue in his mouth and that was glued shut, too. He took a step (I think it's worth mentioning that he lost the towel in the process) and his bare foot landed on some tacks I scattered around on the floor. He tried to yell but his mouth was glued shut so all that came out was "mmpfhhhfff". He hopped around and BOOM he fell down the stairs. Except it wasn't stairs but a sandpaper slide (low-grain so that he wouldn't stop sliding); now you see why he had to be naked. He comes down the slide with half of his skin off and fell RIGHT INTO A PIT OF SALT that I conveniently dug beneath the stairs. That was the point that he succeeded in screaming. And tearing his upper lip off. Ouch. Well that was that, half an hour later I set the house on fire. NOW TELL ME THAT'S NOT THE MOST AWESOME THING YOU'VE EVER READ.

I am NOT publicly gay. If anyone is, you are, you great big poof. And TIME is a good read, just so you know. I bet you read those teen girl magazines.

Signed sincerely,
CK (and yes, you may use the abreviation.)

----------------
My ever so favorite Ego,

Gah! I am in jail, my sweet. They think my godlike powers and demands that they acknowledge me as the supreme deity mean that I think I can kill who I want. I can, but I DON'T! They should worship me more for being so kind!

And there is no one good to worship me here. There's just this mangy dog-like person. I thought he was a dog for a while and went up to pet him. But then he sat up and I could tell his nose didn't stick out. He's all scruffy and small an has these really darty eyes. And smells REALLY bad. I shouldn't have to be in his presence. I am mightier than he! He who is called Fletch, by the way. Like wet shoes against a pavement. "Fletch fletch fletch"

I'm going to tell him to get new shoes and to think up a better name. I'm counting the days until I can be reunited with you, my love! And everyone will realize I am the one true God, and life will be good once more!

Lots of love,
Egotistical Moose

----------
Forced Anonymous was sniped, Roy Salamandra was CK'd, and Egotistical Moose was jailed.

Dearest old friend,

I'm HURT. I understand - AFTER DAYS OF HARASSMENT - that my gift was not appreciated, and might not have been the best gift. That's not the point. The point was, it was a nice gesture that I put a lot of emotion into, and you just IGNORE it. Just because I kill people doesn't mean I don't have FEELINGS.

And so now I'm not going to write to you anymore.
Not until you apologize. And use my knife.

-Sniper


-Diary entry-
I killed Numinous Decay today. I was moping around because my ONLY friend has been really rude to me, so I wasn't really in the mood for killing. But I don't want to stay at home and become a recluse, so I decided killing would be for the better. Fairly boring kill, really. Except for their dog. Big nasty thing. But not bullet proof, because that would be really creepy and bad. So yeah, shot the dog, shot her, and am trying not to be a depressive. Goddamn Crazed Killer.



--
DEAREST Sniper,

I think you're too sensitive. I really, really do. You give me some silly little gift that I don't like, and you're terribly offended and MOPE AROUND ALL DAY. I know you moped because I spotted you on the way to Numinous Decay's house. I don't understand how you can kill people so joyfully when a tinyTINY thing makes you so depressed.

Anyway, on a lighthearted note. I killed The Ti Chan today. I've learned something about myself. I can't kill with quarters. I TRIED. There were quarters up everything I could put quarters up, and down everything I could put quarters down, but that doesn't kill someone. I think I should have used more quarters. So stabbed her because I was exasperated. GUESS WHAT I STABBED HER WITH? YOUR DAMNED KNIFE. I didn't try, but it was all I had. And I'm not apologizing for not using it before and being all "rude" because it was a s**t gift and I HAD NO USE FOR IT.

But you'll still be mad. So whatever.

-Crazed Killer

------------------------

Dear Merty,
Is it bad that here, in this jail cell, all I want are COOKIES? I could live without a shower, I guess. Or privacy or clean clothes. Or good food. But I REALLY want cookies. Damnit. Do you know how weird this jail cell is? Ego and this Fletch guy are yelling at each other, because apparently Fletch stole Ego's plushie of herself. He denies it, and is mad that someone would accuse him of such treacherous acts. Except we all know that me, Real Sex, and Ego are here for absolutely nothing, and Fletch is, so Ego doesn't believe him.

Can you send cookies?
Please and thankyou.

Cravingly,
Verhika

CK -

You waaaaaaaaaant me to want yoooooooooooou. You neeeeeeeeeeeeed me to neeeed you. You'd looooove me to loove you. You're beeeeggiinnnn me to beeggg you.

Also, since when can you not get drunk? I have very VERY clear memories of you running around with no trousers, and I don't think you'd do that sober.

And since when could you give people tribal markings? Or even know what tribal markings would look like?

Yeah, I killed Insom yesterday. Made me giggle. (YES, I giggle.) Sniped Panda Pocky today. That was fun. Well, no, it was really boring because I forgot to kill someone until like midnight, and she was all sleepy and I didn't want to wake her. So it was like BLAMDED. I'm hoping you had an exciting kill to make up for my own.

Less mad now,
Sniper



HEY SNIPER GUESS WHAT,

I DID NOT NEED TO REMEMBER THAT. I'll have you know that when I ran around without pants on that was NOT because I was drunk but because we were playing Truth or Dare which you SHOULD remember because YOU were dared to stick a ferret down your shirt and that's how you got that scar. And I know you giggle. YOU GIGGLE A LOT WHEN YOU ARE DRUNK. AND I AM NOT.
Killed Sae25. Originally meant to kill someone else but he was just standing outside their house and when I arrived he was all "SO IT WAS YOU. YOU WILL NOT HARM INSERT NAME I FORGOT HERE" and I was all WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU G-TEAM OR SUMMIN? and they were all "no" so I just bashed their head in with a computer mouse. I bet the original kill had a right scare when she stepped outside to see what all the fuss was about. But it makes you think, doesn't it? I mean, these people actually care about eachother. If you kill one person, you hurt several others. Hmm.

-CK

PS: OH AND FOR LANZER'S SAKE. The song was Necromancer by Gnarls Barkley.

-----

Dear Siamese,

Okay, I was starting to think that I COULDN'T be jailed. I think I went like 4 days being number two in votes. But I am apparently human. Well, know I'm not, I'm grombie, but you get what I mean.

Guess what I have? GUMMY BEARS. I smuggled them in, and the second I get here I learn that the stupid jailbird is STUPID and steals things. So now I'm eating them really fast so he can't steal them.

The current list of things stolen is:

Ego Plushie
Verhika's underwear (she's going commando LOL)
Otakkun's G team badge
Ego's shoes and socks
A chunk of my hair

Which is a bit WTF. And he won't even admit to it which is stupid.

But whatever. I really dont like it here, BUT I HAVE MY GUMMY BEARS, so I'm kind of okay.

-Merumiharu

Panda Pocky was sniped, Sae25 was CK'd (and PL thinks you have a p***s, I'll get around to fixing that), and Merumiharu was jailed.

ALSO Spontaneous~Spork is out for inactivity.
Sry this is a bit late.

Dearest BLIND MAN,

My scar looks nothing like a heart. And either way, it is possible for werewolves to make heart shaped scars anyway. And do you like to remember painful memories? I clearly remember you drunk with your trousers off and lots of boob in my face.

SPEAKING OF BOOB IN MY FACE - I killed Roger Silverwood today. Which has nothing to do with boobs in faces because he is a proper man and has none. Remember the pool? Closed due to bullets? Well, they were going to reopen it today. No bullets, and the like. And Roger was taking the sign down and the police tape and all that, and I had just HAPPENED to walk by, so I had to snipe him. Go walk by there, you'll see the sign back up.

Okay and what the hell at your mind. The point of killing is to watch people die while feeling good about yourself for ridding the world of another pointless person. We control overpopulation of humans. Be PROUD. Also you saying you aren't turning me or you in means that you had a thought of doing that and HOLY s**t I might disown you.

Ok so thank you for writing me on a piece of plastic because you can't use paper yesterday.

I'm going to throw up on you,
Sniper

--

Dearest DELUSIONAL BUGGER,

You make up memories. I like to remember things that happened. Your chest scar looks stupid. I have great eyes. Moving on - WAIT WHAT THE HELL ABOUT BOOBS.
NOW moving on.

LEXII IS NOW DEAD. Because of a FLAMING TEACUP. I went all out and bought a really nice china set, and my goal is to use every piece of it to kill someone in a different way. And so I set a bunch of teacups on fire and chucked them at her. How do you set teacups on fire? You ask. Douse them in gas, you idiot. And I didn't TOSS the teacups at her, I whipped them at her. At her head, mostly. Which was great fun. Lots of screaming and fire and it was really a spectacular sight.

I am going to avoid the pool, because they will arrest me because they will think only a killer would be near that pool. How have you not gotten caught being around there? And anyway, doesn't natural death rid the world of pointless lives? And what about families? Death is great and all, but it's like dominoes. I do like killing though....

Whatever. Anyway.

Covered in your puke,
Crazed Killer

-----------

My dearest Wrenny,

Draconissa said she wrote you yesterday, so you know how effed up the jail is. I'm currently trying to locate ALL OF MY CLOTHES. ALL OF THEM. I borrowed a jacket from someone so I'm not terribly indecent, but what the hell, Fletch is a dirty pervert. Ego is missing a shrine she was making out of our meals, but that doesn't mean fletch stole it. Someone could have eaten it.

I'm going to kill Fletch if he doesn't give my slippers back. And I MEAN it. I've already done a TON of screaming at him, and I will keep screaming until he gives them back because he lost his hearing.

Hope you're well. And please don't join me. I'd be sad.

Sylfaen


Roger Silverwood is sniped, Lexii is CK'd, and Sylfaen is jailed.

ALSO can a VC PLEASE change the guild title?
<3

Dear IGNORANT FOLK,

I don't see the overdramatic part. You were mean, I was insulted, BUT I am over it! And I haven't gotten mad at so many other things. I am truly amazing. Also, you are careless with your words.

Mmm, I killed Anael de Ezra today. I hadn't seen her around for awhile, so I was like WAIT - WHERE IS SHE! And made it my mission of the day to find and kill her. And I DID! She was couped up in a basement room surrounded by plushies. If I was you, I would have killed her with them. But instead I'm great and just shot her in the head.

And bringing back something you said a couple letters ago - WHY do you like screaming? It's loud, hurts your ears, and draws attention to you. I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT IS APPEALING ABOUT IT.

Anyway. I PLAN ahead. If we kill everyone here, we will be bored. China has overpopulation and everyone only keeps their boys, so if we kill them they'll have less. We are like, superheroes. Saving the world from OVERPOPULATION!

And what the hell, I care about YOU. And also myself, but YOU. Meaning I DON'T only care about myself. Ugh, you're going to call me a sap now.

Not sappy,
Sniper


Dear Sniper.

Awww. You care about me? I'm touched. Probably just 1% me that's overshadowed by 99% you in that big piechart of people you care about, but
still, I'm impressed. Wow, after reading that through again I notice that I AM careless with words. Oh well, it'll be my trademark, like you with your ego. You see, I didn't put 'enormous ego' which means that I am now thinking my words through before I say/write/type/carve them into someone's flesh.

I killed Hirun Hikari today so don't bother giving him a visit in the near future. As a matter of fact, don't visit anyone or anything in about a 5 mile radius of his house. It really, really smells. Who knew setting someone on fire, throwing bird crap on him to douse it (after a period of time of course, you still want them to suffer) and then throwing him to drown in a tank chock full of dead rotten fish and underwear I stole from Padme Potter of Hobbiton's closet(she doesn't need it, she's dead anyway and I think he enjoyed being so close to her underthings which grosses me out because really who thinks about that when they're dying) would stink so much? I had to wear a gas mask all the way through.

I can NOT imagine that you don't like screaming because you hear it so little! I mean, mostly your victims just go "Huh? *DEAD*" Your way of killing is BORING.

OH WOW I JUST HAD AN IDEA. WE SHOULD SWITCH PLACES FOR A DAY. I've got a gun lying around in case I have to kneecap someone, and I'm sure you have at least a flinch of my imagination(which is more than enough)
SO tomorrow you'll crap your pants with excitement and I'll be BORED TO A POINT NEAR DEATH. SEE? NEAR. WATCHING MY WORDS HERE.

And also I do not see the point of killing Chinese because the Chinese are awesome. You know that cloak? The one you wear ALL THE TIME? GUESS WHO MADE IT.
THE CHINESE. Chinese are awesome and I think we should spend time killing the Americans when we finish killing everyone in the towns. If we finish it. We could always caught or kill the other and who knows what.
Oh and there we have the unwanted thoughts again. I'm not going to indulge you because you know that any guilt feelings of mine will pass once I smell blood again.

Hope you don't crap yourself and take MY job tomorrow,
CK.



Creampudding pie Meiko,

I miss you with all my heart! I want you to be jailed to so we can be together once more!
I can see you now, waiting on the bed with your shirt unbuttoned and your hair flowing down in cascading ringlets, your body screaming for my presence! OH HOW I YEARN FOR YOU IN THIS DARK CELL.

A man-hardly a man, I call him a rat- was cunning enough to steal my hair! Now every inch of me is completely hairless! Such blasphemy! Will you still love me even though I'm bald? Ah, I'm sure you will, our love goes deeper than mere flesh!

With a passion burning with the fire of a thousand suns,
Mercain


Anael De Ezra was SNIPED, Hirun Hikari was CK'd, and Mercain, the DARK NEWSREPORTER was JAILED. GJ guys. Took you long enough.

Dear PORN WATCHER,

I HADN'T showered when I wrote you. That doesn't mean I DON'T shower. Idiot.

My ego is great. And you probably missed kashi's head and really hit his ear or something and had to shoot him again.

My life isn't occupied by KILLING, stupid. Killing is a HOBBY. In addition to killing, I enjoy horoscopes, swimming, badminton, microwaving, and porn.

But not a lot of porn. A little porn. Sometimes.

Anyway, killed Merty today. That was fun. Actually, no it wasn't, because I was STUPID and unloaded my damn gun yesterday. So I get to their house, shoot, and nothing happens. And because yesterday taught me to hate your work, I tied her up REALLY tight, gagged her, and FOUND MY POOL, thinking MAYBE THERE WILL BE A REMAINING BULLET. And I win, because they hadn't gotten to cleaning the pool out at all. Grabbed a handful, nearly got caught by a stupid effing police who was patrolling around there. Got back, loaded the gun, shot her.

Yayded.

YOU WATCH PORN,
Sniper

Dear mister NAIVE,

EVERYONE watches porn. Some more than others. I just happen to fall in the "others" category, and you in the "some" one.
Oh and I did not hit his ear. I hit his SHOULDER. Which was fun while he was screaming and bleeding but then I remembered I had to do YOUR BORING JOB.
You may have your hobbies but I only have my collections (Which are NOT WEIRD. NOT. I like glasses and doll's eyes. That does NOT make me weird.) and the internet. And my books. You know how I love my books.

Killed Kiyo_Michan today which was like seven kinds of AWESOME. I seriously am jealous of her death because it is the most awesome death to EVER happen. Delicious, too. You know what I did? I made her eat Oreos.
CRUEL, EH? EH? Now your thinking "what the hell Crazy Killer you just got crazier that's not cruel at all"
WRONG.
Kiyo was ALLERGIC to some ingredient in there and DIED after the first cookie. I think I did her a favour. Can you imagine, a life without Oreo's? I KNOW HORRIBLE RIGHT. You know what her last words were? She thanked me. For letting her eat something so delicious.
I didn't even know she had an allergy. I just thought I'd let her eat on and on until she'd explode so now I have this HUGE stack of Oreo's just SITTING HERE and WAITING to be eaten. BY ME. I have SOME heart, so I'm sending you a box. MUNCH
MUNCH
MUNCH

Drowning in a sea of delicious happiness,
-CK

Darling Vlad,
Oh gee, I'm terribly, terribly sorry for delaying your capture of the sniper/CK another day. I really am. Please forgive me! I'm being punished enough by having my ability to play the piano stolen from me, I don't know how.
No, I'm not angry at being in jail, I like sharing what little bit of food I have with my fellow jailbirds who are all really quite charming. This Fletch fellow is particularly nice, I like talking to him. I think the rest of the jailees think I'm a bit scary though.
Oh well.
Please stay safe! biggrin

-Kitty Krazy

Merty is sniped, Kiyo_Michan is killed, Kitty Krazy is jailed.

Crazed Killer,

If she was your good friend, WHY did you kill her? I'm all for killing WORTHLESS LIVES, but IF YOU CARE ABOUT HER DON'T KILL HER. It would be simple - LOCK YOUR CLOSETS. AND CUPBOARDS. That would actually be a REALLY good idea, so I can stop running into your collection of severed hands or disembodied eyeballs OR THAT ONE TIME WHEN I FOUND THAT COLLECTION OF MUSHROOMS GROWING FROM THAT GRAY STUFF.

Anyway.

YOU HAVE A PROBLEM. Killing is good, killing friends is bad. Now I don't want to go around your house any more because I MIGHT GET KILLED BY YOU.

Let's take this step by step.

1. Shower. Take a nice, hot shower, and get all the blood off.
2. Wash your clothes that have blood on them. If the stains don't come off, bleach if they're white, burn them otherwise. Not on a person either. Just burn them in your sink. You don't need the memories.
3. Clean blood off of everything you can clean blood off of. You're a cleaner, you know how it's a good therapy. Just concentrate on getting the blood off everything. If you can't get it off the walls, PAINT THEM. A new color. I'd come over, but I think it's better for me to help you with this problem through letters.
4. DON'T invite anyone over. And when you kill someone today, bring the most humane things you can find. If you own a handgun, take that. Otherwise, take my knife. ONLY my knife. No matches, no rope. No acid, no sporks or spoons or forks. Just slip my knife up your sleeve. Again, if you have a gun, take that. I'd mail you one but ..... yeah. And remember - JUST STAB THEM. QUICKLY. THEN LEAVE. Clean the knife before you go, bring the knife with you.

YOU WILL BE OKAY.

I can kill people simply. Did it today. Was sitting on my porch, Return_of_Watanuki-San came out her door for the morning paper, and I shot her in the head. Went back inside and ate breakfast. Simple, humane, effective.

You're going to be okay.

-Sniper

Dearest Sniper,
You can not IMAGINE how hard I am laughing right now. You know yesterday I was all emo and s**t but now I just can't stop cackling. I followed your advice. Well, most of it. I washed everything I could wash, burned the rest, painted my walls a nice red and brought only your knife to my kill today because GUNS ARE BORING and I can't aim as you very well know and laughed at me about.

Now this is where it went wrong. Or right, idunno. So I took the knife, right, and set off to find Ginny Amadala of Hobbiton's house. I rang the doorbell as a polite(AND EMO) person would and I bit my fingernails but there was blood stuck under my nails and when I tasted that you should have seen me man, I went all kinds of batshit insane, haha. I kicked down her door yelling "IT'S CK TIME, b***h. WHOO!" and she, who had scared herself shitless while sitting on the couch tried to run but I caught her, threw her on the floor and CUT THROUGH THOSE THINGS. On your heel. They start with Achilles something something and it REALLY REALLY hurts if you sprain them well then imagine what happens if you cut through them. I can tell you it's not pretty. What happened after that was kind of the usual. I cut off various limbs and other stuff, pulled out her teeth and eyes, stuff like that. Most fun I'd had in years.
Oh well. Hey Sniper, I really, REALLY don't care about the world anymore, anyone can die for all I care. And I want us to kill them. We should move on to other countries, see the world! And kill people!

Oh man, I have to go, House is on. Ta!
Yours,
-CK

Dearest Inasanemonkey1230,
Jail is AWESOME. Seriously. I'm having loads of fun laughing at people who got their stuffs stolen. Well, I got my plushie stolen but hey, laughter has a price.
This Fletch guy hasn't woken up since I got here, I hope he isn't dead. Oh wait, he's snoring. NOT DEAD.
Well, how is it at home? I hope the Sniper and the CK kill you all biggrin
Signed Sincerely,
Joey Sohma.


Return_of_Watanuki-san is sniped, Ginny Amidala of Hobbiton is killed, Joey Sohma is jailed.
AND YOU ALL ARE GOING TO LOSE HAHA

And the thread title is absolutely random. I just have that song stuck in my head.