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Posted: Wed Nov 07, 2007 9:18 pm
Ok you see me and Whitney have been friends for a long time. One night while at her house something sparked in us and we ended up fooling around a bit. All I saw was fooling around, but it really broke her heart that I didn't love her. I did love her, I was just young and stupid. I thought dating a girl was weird. I guess eventually Whitney let it go, I don't know for sure.
I was in a really abusive relationship with this guy named Chris. Whitney got me out of it and hooked me up with the best guy in the world. His name is Jared and I love him, ALOT... We've been together now for ten months.
But, you see, Whitney went to boarding school this March by the will of her evil mother. I've found myself missing her alot and even wanting her. Then I started having very sexual and romance based dreams with Whitney in them. I've been finding it hard to admit it to myself, but I am in love with her. The problem is I love Jared too. He knows I find Whitney attractive and even that upsets him a little.
Is it wrong that I love them both? Is there anyway I CAN love them both? I've heard from alot of people that I should date Jared and Whitney, but in the end thats unfair to both of them... I'm confused and hurting real bad here.
I need a way out of this if there even is one. So please, lend me your advice gaia.
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Posted: Thu Nov 08, 2007 6:55 am
Three way relationships usually end up with someone being hurt badly. If your boyfriend is already upset by the fact that you love this girl then that should tell you something right there. You may have to look deep into your heart and make a choice as to who you want to be with. A poly relationship only works if all sides are willing to be part of the triangle. Otherwise it can be a disaster and you might end up with no one at all. So you need to sit down and really think about your feelings for these two before making a deciding who you will stay with.
Well, I wish you all the luck.
Kat
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Posted: Sun Nov 11, 2007 9:06 pm
I agree with the other guy completely....Baby you need to decide who you love the most out of both of them....And just be with that one.....Being with 2 different people can be very stressful on all of you....Trust me...My brother is the same way....He is engaged to someone but loves some1 else too.....They both know it......But he knows he cant have both of them...[both are girls] but he really wants them both.....He's struggling trying to figure out who he wants more but since there both the love of his life he cant make up his mind and its tearing him apart.....I really do wish he'd join this guild but he just wont....Btw if u want to lend him some support his name is xXxKituXxX
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Posted: Tue Nov 13, 2007 6:47 pm
My heart stops beating only for you, baby... What I think needs to happen is some serious (preferably face-to-face, in person) talks with each of them. Make sure they're both aware of what's going on and understand what you're going through. You might want to even take a bit of a break from your boyfriend, just so you can really step back and reevaluate your relationship and your feelings. In the end, your heart will know the real answer. You just have to give it a little push on its way.For your loving...
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Posted: Sat Nov 24, 2007 2:48 am
Messenger of the Moon makes a great point about reassessing your feelings for both of them. I'm not saying it happened in this case, but based on what you've told us so far it is possible you "rebounded" into Jared because of the abusive relationship, and maybe Whitney got taken in too because of the emotions involved. It may not be love so much as hero worship.
You need to really assess your relationship with both of them and be brutally honest with yourself about where you want to be, and with whom.
One more warning, if you are having sex with either of them, it can ( I said can...) make you feel sooooo good about a person that you get "rose coloured" glasses about your relationships and feelings. Just something to keep in mind as you do your assessment (as is the fact that all of us have only limited insight to your situation, based on what you told us, and you should keep that proverbial "grain of salt" handy as you read all of this...).
^_^
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Posted: Sat Nov 24, 2007 9:34 am
My heart stops beating only for you, baby... I definitely agree with that last point. 3nodding
Sex can give you major emotional attachments. You can get really emotionally attached to someone you don't actually even love. You have to be able to make that distinction and be prepared for that. <3For your loving...
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Posted: Sun Dec 02, 2007 2:43 pm
wow, isn't it freaky when you find people in your same situation? O-O
I went through a similar experience. I was with a guy who was absolutely amazing, then I met this girl who I just "clicked" with so much that I fell in love with her. Eventually I decided it wasn't fair to stay with the guy, regardless of how good everything was with us, if I was so in love with this other girl, so I broke up with him. Well, I haven't the slightest chance with the girl (which I came to my senses about afterwards, of course) and now the guy has moved on, so I'm alone.
The only reason I'm telling you this is because this is one way it might go for you, depending on how things are in your situation. I've kind of realized that I'm a loving person, that I don't just make friends I fall in love with people, but I get that love confused with relationshippy love, and that's what ruined my lovelife. So I hope you can figure out exactly what you're feeling for the girl AND for the guy, and I hope you understand that whatever you try to do it will be permanent. There will be no turning back.
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Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2007 3:45 pm
I don't think being lonely will be permanent for you, "NoMoreLabels91", but I'll bet you'll be more careful next time. And then, as it is supposed to, it will work out fine. ^_^
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