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And by that, I don't just mean that the woman stays at home while the man works (though that is a part of it), I mean how guys can't cry and women can't lift heavy things.

This discussion sparked by a passing comment of "guys can't be cuddled" by one of my friends.

What do you think of the code of chivalry? Do you think it's romantic or do you think its sexist?

How about the idea of guys not being able to cry/be cuddled/get held/show emotion?


Personally, I think the code of chivalry is sexist to a degree. If you pull that chivalrous crap on me just cause I'm female, I'm liable to punch you. However, if you do it cause you like me, or I'm unable to do it myself because I'm carrying something, I probably won't.

And the whole guy thing is just a bunch of BS.

Your thoughts?

So, your saying, that because I've got breasts I can't think like a guy? That I must think like a femal because physically I am female?

Now I understand the that females are physically weaker than guys in some cases, but what does that have to do with the way I think?

I think gender roles are simply a remainder of our apelike psyche. Whether we'll manage to outgrow these primitive notions is yet to be seen.

Violent crimes are more highly reported to be done by men than women. On women's crimes, we hear most frequently about them being financial. Maybe I'm jumping to conclusions, but I think these things might be related to much more than which chromosomes these people are born with.

Men are taught that emotion is below them, that it is not a respectable trait. In a sense, we work on destroying male empathy right from the beginning by teaching our men that it's "girly" to cry. At least from my observations, and heck, maybe some first hand experience, repressed emotion tends to lead up to frustration which often causes aggression.

Women are taught to always put the kids, the family before themselves. We're still teaching our women to act on the formula that a man will be there to take care of them, and a lot of them are learning the hard way that this is not the case. Even the wage gap is reminiscent of this standard. In turn we have more women motivated to swindle.

The most frequently stated differences I hear stated between men and women are emotional tendencies and physical capabilities. I've yet to hear of smaller men of Asian descent being denied jobs due to their smaller size/density, and while women are viewed with skepticism in their emotional control because of once a month occurrences I know there's plenty of men who are emotionally unstable 24/7. And men are expected to be emotionally ignorant, hygienically challenged (heck, we call any straight man who has fashion sense metrosexual), ridiculously confrontational.

I hold doors for both sexes. And bah, I'm still waiting for "Zir" to be put on medical forms as an applicable title.

Gender roles are s**t. Plain and simple. Gender roles exist because the different genders have predispositions towards different things; but, that doesn't mean you can force a whole half of the population into something just because the majority of them prefer it.

Chivalry is a different issue. I pay for my dates, I hold doors for them, I pull out chairs for them, because they are my date and deserve some common courtesy. I do the same for any hottie, male or female, so, hmm...maybe that's not chivalry, the way I practice it.

Wait. What? You lost me completely there. I think.

Are you saying that that's how we were created and our mindset evolved that way or are you saying that the mindset was there first and our body evolved to reflect that?

Or are you saying something else?

Firstly, please just call me Lydia. Lydia Trebond is so formal sounding.

Secondly, you succeeded in confusing me more. I understand the second part, but the first part makes my head reel.

Sadly enough, I understand the third part quite well, which should be the confusing part.

So do you think now that society is beginning to change, these things will become more acceptable even if our bodies don't evolve that way?

Personally, I see in society today a welcome relaxing of, nearly a fluidity of gender roles. It is only when confronted with male nurses or crossdressers that people seem to freak out. Anyone that thinks a man has to act chivalrous or can't show emotion seems to have misunderstood the human condition. I don't pity then, but I do pity men caught up in their stupid delusions.
As for the argument that that is how our mindset has evolved, I feel the need to counter it with the point that we have, as human beings, evolved beyond our natural mindset, and should set aside 'natural' bias in this case too.

I don't think you can say that mentality and physicality are only slightly related. You act a certain way because of your body. Think about it: when you're overweight, you develop an awareness of the fact, and dress and act accordingly. Therefore it only stands to reason that if you have a p***s, unless you are subject to a positive influence otherwise, you will define yourself by its presence.