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 Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 11:06 am
I am such a ******** coward.
There are no two ways about it.
He’s been on twice, and I’ve not talked to him.
It wasn’t like we were dating, so in theory, it should be easy, right?
Oh, but I liked him oh so much. I just waited too long to tell him as much.
But how do you tell a guy that you just wanna move on, when you never dated, and ‘moving on’ involves liking his best friend, who is moving back to the States next month.
Yeah. Moving backwards is more like it.
I can’t hurt him. I did like him once, and now he’s just a friend to me.
But I don’t know what would be worse. Knowing I hurt him, or him just saying whatever, and really be hurt, or him not caring because he never did.
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Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 11:47 am
Do you need to tell him you want to move on? I mean, if you waited too long to tell him you liked him, it implies that there's nothing to move on from. I may just be misreading. But you do say he's just a friend. A friend ought to understand.
Either way, the way I see it, yeah, it may hurt to find out that he doesn't care, but that may not be his choice. You can't MAKE a person care, after all.
Yes, it may hurt to learn the truth, but at least you aren't hurting him.
Then again I've given up on being overly bothered by silly stuff like love. razz So I'd rather be the one who's hurt than hurt someone else. Mostly because I know I can take it without too much trouble, and still keep the person as a friend after.
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Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 12:05 pm
I feel like I have to tell him, mainly because I've fallen for his best friend. And I once was upset with him because he didn't tell me he had a girlfriend. So I feel like I have to tell him to avoid being hypocritical (though me and his best friend aren't dating persay)
Yeah, but if he never cared, it means that (for a while at least) he pretended to. (We were romantic for a couple of days when I went to see him and another friend). So it would hurt like hell.
Meh.
I say I'd rather be the one hurt, but I would rather neither of us getting hurt.
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Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 12:32 pm
Meh. A couple days.
I don't think most guys are quite as hung up on the dating friends thing.
Especially if there's really nothing between you now.
Just talk to him about it. Either he'll care or he won't, but at least it'll be out of the way.
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Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 12:39 pm
*sigh* thanks
Now I get to fret and worry about what I'm going to say till he gets on.
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Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 1:29 pm
I cannot say I'm very good at this either, but my advice would be to assess the situation carefully before making up any elaborate speeches... maybe he already perceives you as a friend more than anything else, and then the whole thing would not be necessary... I mean, how intimate is your relationship right now? Do you think he will be very sad if you tuned it down just a notch?
Don't worry too much. In my experience, boys are generally more robust than girls, and they usually don't fret or overanalyze things. If he had a problem with how things are between you, he would probably have talked to you about it already.
"Boys kick their friendship about like a soccer ball, and it lasts forever. Girls carry it gingerly like precious china and promptly, it breaks."
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Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 3:10 pm
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Posted: Sun Dec 16, 2007 3:55 pm
Intimate? *laughs* my dear, we live four hours apart, if the traffic is okay.
We talk when we can online. We were close when we last talked, but his net's been out for a while.
We haven't been able to talk, that's the problem.
I like that quote though.
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Posted: Mon Dec 17, 2007 2:26 am
Well, then talk. And, if I may be so bold, don't fall over him with a premade speech of sorts. Don't think about what you will say at all. Trust me, it will work out alright if you just let it develop naturally instead of trying to force it in a particular direction.
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Posted: Mon Dec 17, 2007 7:04 am
PS, no internet? What about telephone?
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Posted: Mon Dec 17, 2007 12:01 pm
Cin~ D: all right. I'll take your word for it.
Ffaux~ I only have his cell, and it's long distance. Plus I hate talking on phones.
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Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2007 3:08 am
*nods* Best of luck to you. I have a feeling it will turn out alright eventually.
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Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2007 12:55 pm
Cinerea *nods* Best of luck to you. I have a feeling it will turn out alright eventually. Thank you. Once I found the courage to say hi, it turned out all right. We never brought up the subject, but it wasn't the same as before. So now I've got a boyfriend and a friend and I'm overly happy. Thank you all. heart
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Posted: Tue Dec 18, 2007 1:25 pm
Ah, I'm glad to hear that. re- heart
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Posted: Mon Dec 24, 2007 8:05 pm
Ffaux Pas Do you need to tell him you want to move on? I mean, if you waited too long to tell him you liked him, it implies that there's nothing to move on from. I may just be misreading. But you do say he's just a friend. A friend ought to understand.
Either way, the way I see it, yeah, it may hurt to find out that he doesn't care, but that may not be his choice. You can't MAKE a person care, after all.
Yes, it may hurt to learn the truth, but at least you aren't hurting him.
Then again I've given up on being overly bothered by silly stuff like love. razz So I'd rather be the one who's hurt than hurt someone else. Mostly because I know I can take it without too much trouble, and still keep the person as a friend after.
If anyone wants to challenge either of us on the fact that you can't MAKE someone care, I direct your attention to Bruce Almighty.
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