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Posted: Sun Jan 06, 2008 7:11 pm
~ ~ Key To My Heart ~~
I had closed the door to my heart
And I wouldn't let anyone in
I had trusted and loved only to be hurt,
but that would never happen again
I had locked the door and tossed the key
As far and wide as I could
Love would never come in again...
My heart was closed for good
Then you came into my life
And made me change my mind,
And just when I thought that tiny
Key was impossible to find...
Thats when you held out your hand
And proved to me I was wrong
Inside your palm was the key to my heart...
And you had it all along
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Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 12:14 pm
Very good. Just one thing that I'd suggest- you don't have to do this if you don't want to- but maybe change the line "Love would never enter there again..." to something with one less syllable, like, "Love would never come in again..." Just to make it flow a bit better.
Again, you don't have to do it if you don't want to. Very nice poem.
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Posted: Mon Jan 07, 2008 1:39 pm
Thank you and now looking at it would sound much nicer if i changed it. Thanx smile
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Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2008 8:55 am
I like it a lot. I can feel it...
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Posted: Wed Jan 09, 2008 7:59 pm
Wow, that's really, really moving! Beautifully done, I love the end! Great rhyming too!
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Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2008 2:19 pm
Thank you Sita Carew and Lady Midori biggrin
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Posted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 1:55 pm
JenLuvSvs6969 Thank you and now looking at it would sound much nicer if i changed it. Thanx smile Glad I could help. smile
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 8:09 am
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Posted: Sat Jan 19, 2008 6:13 pm
Beautiful.I especially love the last two lines.
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Posted: Thu Feb 21, 2008 6:41 pm
Wow.. i really like this.. its truly touching
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