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 Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2008 9:38 am
I know we have all had those moments in game when everyone just bursts out laughing, weather it caused the party members pain, suffering, or it was just plain odd. Well lets hear em!
"Your party member falls off the edge, what do you do?"
"Wrap my whip around his lag and pull him up!" (rolls dice) "I hit!" (rolls dice again) "I fail my str cheak..."
"You fall with him"
"I use my other whip to hold on to something near the edge!" (rolls dice) "I hit!"
"Ok...now you are hanging from the edge by one whip...and holding your party member by another...what whip is holding the person?"
"The one with glass in it..."
(I had the whip, I forgot who I was holding up)
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Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2008 10:14 am
"I cast flaming sphere."
:snicker, snicker:
"DON'T. Dan, I swear, don't do it. I'll hurt you, I swear."
:snicker snicker:
"DON'T!"
"Don't do what?"
"Damn you Ally!"
"GOODNESS GRACIOUS, GREAT BALLS OF FIRE!"
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DJ Blackrock Vice Captain
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Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2008 4:47 pm
"The two warriors left standing shall be my protectors!'
"What about the one's on the right?"
~Me and Brad~
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Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2008 7:15 pm
Red throws a granade at the bad guys right after mustard gas was used...FIRE EVERYWHERE!! domokun
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DJ Blackrock Vice Captain
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Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2008 10:05 pm
Dan: "Is Mustard Gas flammable?"
He who shall not be named: "Ooooh Yeah. Very."
Dan: "Hmm.... Adam. Roll to dive for cover."
Adam: " biggrin biggrin biggrin biggrin !!!!!!!!!"
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Posted: Sun Jan 13, 2008 11:16 pm
Brent: The room the pearl is in is empty. You find it easily enough.
In a moment of surreal clarity I look at Matt, Matt looks at me. We nod to each other, no words spoken.
Matt: Brent, I'm going to transform into the pearl.
Me: I switch the pearl with Matt.
Brent stares at us blankly.
Brent: WHAT?
After a silent moment of sheer astonishment...
Brent: Well there goes that plotline...
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Posted: Mon Jan 14, 2008 10:18 pm
Brad- Woah! He's a dude, dude!!!
Jocie- That's a girl.
Me-I'm a boy
Jocie-Sure you are, hunny.
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Posted: Tue Jan 15, 2008 8:09 am
Bear with me, some are sort of long smile
From a high-experience Sidereals game (Exalted):
Me: I laugh in his face, and then take that laughter and use Generalized Ammunition Technique to turn it into arrows and shoot them toward him.
Connor: Oh my god, guys, if I had that Charm, I would only shoot Ludacris lyrics.
From a Forgotten Realms module I ran a while back (D&D)
(The players are a group of drow hoping to infiltrate another drow city and discover the reason for Lolth's silence.)
Me: There's someone approaching from the north, but they're too far away to see you.
Liz: Crap. Okay, wait! I've got Alter Self. I'm turning myself into a sun elf. Then I'm taking my two sets of masterwork manacles and chaining up Will and Nick. They're my prisoners now.
Me: Right. Nalfaein (the party NPC) uses Alter Self as well to turn himself into a moon elf. He pulls a holy symbol of Corellon Larethian out of his pack and puts it on. As you finish the final touches on the design, you see a light crest over the hill, and a group of figures appears. The leader, a woman, calls down, "You! Stop!"
Liz: "Oh, thank the gods! We were attacked by drow in the woods! We would like your help!"
Me: The leader comes further down and peers at you. She's a half-elf, wearing armor and holding a longsword. "I'm amazed you managed to capture some of them. Are you hurt?"
Liz: "Only a bit. We managed to heal our major wounds. But some of our party was lost in the fight. I... I loved some of them, I think."
Me: The captain nods in sympathy. "My name is Iris, I'm the lieutenant of the border guard. And you are...?"
Liz: "My name's.... Filareaniana. And this is my friend... Gidalwyn."
Me: [while laughing] Make a Bluff check!
Liz: ...Critical success!
(We STILL make jokes about that name.)
From my current D&D game:
(for a short explanation, the players just entered a tourney and are checking out the competition, while placing bets on the likely winner.)
Me: The man in front of you is tall, with dark hair and olive skin. He's wearing a red coat, dark pants, knee-high boots and a wide-brimmed hat. He's probably Castillo, the second-place winner from last year you've been hearing about.
Steven: So, he looks like a pirate?
Me: ...Yes, he does. You also notice that his accent is strange, nothing like you've ever heard.
Brian: Even me? I speak Giant!
Me: Yes, even you. You don't recognize it at all.
Brian: It's not Auran? Infernal? Aquan?
Steven: It's probably Aquan. Wait, guys! Maybe he's a mermaid!
Me: Uh, not quite...
Shelly: But he looks like a pirate! Maybe he's a SPACE pirate!
Me: Guys, you're getting a little...
Steven: No, I got it! He's a SPACE MERMAID.
[insert moment of silence]
Brian: I go up to the bookie and put down all my gold. I point to Castillo. "I'm betting all my money that that guy is a space mermaid. What are my odds?"
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Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2008 7:38 pm
2 quick ones...
"Pedro, your bow BREAKS" Shortest lived Item of Power in BESM history.
and of course the always popular...
Jocie as Tigerlily and herself: "I'm not moving form this spot. those dragons are going to come and eat us. I'm just gonna sit here and let them come and eat me."
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Posted: Thu Jan 17, 2008 5:52 pm
It was actually more like -
"Screw you guys, that dragon is gonna smell us and then eat us. I ain't touching nothing, I'm just going to sit here and let you guys get eaten."
"But Jocie, your character doesn't know that."
"Of course she doesn't, I DO. I'm not moving."
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Posted: Fri Jan 25, 2008 12:55 pm
RPGA tournament at Dragon-con 99. All characters were ready-made by the RPGA for this module set. The object was to get out of a cave labyrinth in the least amount of time with the fewest casualties. The RPGA DM for this module set had the opinion that dungeons were made to gather loot…for the dungeon, not for the characters to actually make it out alive. My gaming group singed up for this event just for a “challenge.” The characters were as follows: Insign – lvl 12 human fighter, played by Brock Diligar – lvl 12 gnome rogue played by Jerry Robin – lvl 12 wood elf ranger played by Leigh Seracar – lvl 12 dwarf paladin played by Robbie Jerabun – lvl 12 high elf magician played by me RPGA DM: As you enter the cavern, you notice a large horde of treasure around you. Dan:
Robbie: don’t….
Dan: but…
Robbie: don’t
Dan:
Dan:
RPGA DM: As you pick up the gem, the ground starts to quake and an adult blue dragon emerges from the center of the horde
Me: crap
Robbie: ut oh…
Leigh: we don’t have to kill him…we just have to be able to run faster then the gnome…
Jerry: Hey!
Me: I’ve got an idea. I cast Magic Jar on the dragon
RPGA DM: rifles thru a couple of books, rolls some dice and looks up at us with disgust
We proceed to waltz through the dungeon with ease with my soul in the dragon’s body and his soul trapped in a jar kept in Leigh’s belt pouch. The RPGA asked us never to sign up for another dungeon again.
Then there was this time when my gaming team was playing Cyberpunk and my character, Coldmiser, and crew ran into a boostergang of Ninja Fighting Elvises. Leigh shoots one in the crotch (she was aiming for his knee) and the booster looked up at her and said "Don't be cruel, momma" just before folding up like a suitcase.
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Posted: Sun Jan 27, 2008 9:54 pm
Kite declines sex with Angel to hunt cyotes(sp?) using chicken as bait.
Later on Angel hands Kite a bowl of chicken...Damn you Angel.
(Crappy description, but that's basically what happened)
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Posted: Sun Jan 27, 2008 11:31 pm
*smirk*
It was pretty funny. Don't think that'll stop Angel though.
I like this one personally -
Two government Agents knock on a door expecting a black man. Instead they find a blind white guy.
Agent: "We're looking for a Jack Lightstone"
Alex: "Jack Lightstone? I'm Jack Brown!"
The agents realize they've made a mistake, and begin apologizing profusely.
Agent: "Oh my god sir, we are so sorry... How could we make a mistake like this?"
Alex: "While you're here, could you do something about my subsidized housing? Do you realize what it's like to be a blind man having to live under these conditions?"
Agent: "We'll do what we can sir. We are so sorry to bother you."
Meanwhile...
Angel: "Where the hell is Alex? OMG I hope he's not dead!"
Jack: "Maybe it WASN'T such a good idea to leave him alone..."
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Posted: Sun Jan 27, 2008 11:44 pm
I like this one too. It was a small fight angel and william had got into and struck eachothers sore spots.
Will-Dont start with me girl.
Angel- *grins* Who is Eric Donner? *pulls out will's photo album* Is this him? The red head? He's hot. Is he single?
Will- *growls* No.
Anthony- "................."
William- *sticks ductape on angel* Who is charlie? *smirk*
*arguing insues* *william storms out*
Angel- Geeze. *to anthony* What do you see in him?
Anthony- *sighs* Will is rather headstrong and bratty. But when you get to see his personality, you'd understand.
Angel-"......................what personality?"
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Posted: Mon Jan 28, 2008 8:27 am
Martin, just after taking a doctors outfit, hears the SWAT Team just outside the bathroom yelling at Kite to get his hands in the air. While they were not looking, Martin got in the elevator(sp?) only to find like 3 other doctors trying to save a man who has been shot many times. They see Martin and ask for help, and he says
"I'm on break!" and runs out of there very fast.
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