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This is a little something I was fooling around with around the time I discovered the new MOTU toyline WAAAY back in '02. I've cleaned it up a little, and hope you enjoy it.

(The original document had a picture embedded in it of a prototype of Jungle Attack He-Man, in all it's savage glory.)


Isn’t that just awesome?? Imagine with me the fun children would have with this one. Or grown ups, in fact…

:Skeletor, Beast-Man and Trap-Jaw traversing through the Vietnam jungle in order to find out Castle Grayskull’s location:

Skeletor: Alright Trap-Jaw, you have to take the point. We have to consider Tri-klops M.I.A.
Beast-Man: Duh, maybe he went AWOL, boss.
Skeletor: Silence, Fur Face! If I hear any more talk of going AWOL…
Trap-Jaw: SHHHH!! Be quiet!
Skeletor: What is it, Trap-Jaw?

::AAAOOOO OOOO OOOOOGGGAAA!!:

Beast-Man: Charlie? It’s Charlie, isn’t it??
Skeletor: Beast-Man! Quiet!
Beast-Man: THE CONG ARE COMING FOR ME!!
Skeletor: :smack: SNAP OUT OF IT, PYLE…er…BEAST-MAN!!
Beast-Man: Not…Charlie??
Trap-Jaw: Worse…its Jungle Attack He-Man.
J.A.He-man: RAAAHHH!!
Trap-Jaw: MEDI-- :falls to ground with throat cut:

::Jungle Attack He-Man disappears back into the bush::

Beast-Man: He’s gonna pick us off, one by one. :sits on ground, rocks back and forth:
Skeletor: Come on, Beast-Man. We’ve got to find Grayskull.
Beast-Man: Not with that nutjob out there. We’re gonna die out here, man. WE’RE GONNA DIE!!
Skeletor: Beast-Man! What’s your major malfunction?!
Beast-Man: I AM NOT AN ANIMAL :shoots Skeletor repeatedly with M-16: I AM A HUMAN BEINGGGG!! :shoots Skeletor some more:

::Beast-Man runs screaming through the jungle, until he finds a clearing next to a river::

Beast-Man: :looks all around, panting: I think……I think I’ll be alright here.

::Jungle Attack He-Man rises from the river and slashes upward with his sword::

Beast-man: He-MaAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!

::The M-16 rifle fires its remaining rounds as Beast-man’s hands fall to the ground::

J.A. He-man: (in Stallone voice) Yo, Fur Face. I'm yer worst nightmare.

::A vertical slash splits Beast-man down the middle, leaving He-Man the Master of Jungle Terrain::

Winner – Jungle Attack He-Man

Yeah, I came up with that. It was kinda corny though. The idea of a jungle themed He-Man seemed cool and new enough to poke fun at. I did one where I pit 1980's He-Man with Marshall Bravestarr, but I can't find it anywhere, so I'll have to re-write it.

Yeah, Bravestarr was a Filmation cartoon. Probably one of the last ones. It was a good toon, very original storyline, but it had so many similarities to He-Man that I dismissed it as a knockoff of something I thought was great, right down to the moral at the end.

For example:

He-Man invoked his power using a specific battle cry. "By the power of Grayskull. Bravestarr did too. "Strength of the Bear! Speed of the Puma! Eyes of the Hawk! Ears of the Wolf!"

He-Man got his powers from a mystic (Sorceress) who lived in a castle carved with the face of a skull. Bravestarr got his powers from a mystic (Shaman) who lived in a mountain carved with four totems, the bear, puma, wolf and hawk.

He-Man rode a talking tiger named Battle Cat. Bravestarr rode a talking horse named Thirty Thirty.

He-Man fought a skeletal faced villain with magic powers and an army of cronies. Bravestarr fought a skeletal framed villain with magic powers and an army of cronies.

I can go on, but I think you get the point. That was mainly the intro for both characters in my He-Man vs. Bravestarr story, so that'll save me a lot of rewriting on here smile But don't get me wrong, Bravestarr is a good toon and all, but it will NEVER be a He-Man.