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Okay.... first of all.... I hate Good Friday. I am always depressed this time of year. For those who don't know the story, our oldest daughter was born April 6, 2001 and died April 11, 2001. She was buried on Good Friday (April 13) that year. Needless to say, I don't look forward to Good Friday. On a side note, to protect the kids, Aiodhan and I usually try to take them some place fun and have a "family day" on Good Friday. We remember the two children we've lost, but we try not to dwell because we don't want our living two to feel bad. I don't know how else to explain it.

To top off the fact that I am already depressed, I think my dog is dying. Yes, we have four dogs, but one stays with Aiodhan, one stays with PrincessFrooFroo, one stays with the BeanDozer, and the oldest one is mine. He's almost 10. He's been sick about three weeks and is losing weight really fast. He can't walk across the room without having a hard time breathing. When I pick him up, just the pressure of holding him, no matter how gently I pick him up, makes it hard for him to breath. The "comfort" I've gotten from Pop (my father-in-law) is "Well, you know this type of dog doesn't usually live that long and he's had a good 10 years." Don't get my wrong, I LOVE my in-laws. They have always treated me like their daughter, not their daughter-in-law. I just don't think Pop knows how to make me feel better about Iko, but he's trying. It just didn't help much.

As a final straw, my Princess turned into a stark raving looney tonight and started screaming that she hated me and wanted to run away. (All because I wouldn't let her turn the tv channel.)

I'm sure I'll put it all together and be okay tomorrow, but tonight I just need to vent to someone....anyone. Sorry to ramble so much. The stress was just making me sick and I had to vent to someone.

Big hugs sweetie. I know the pain you are feeling both over your sweet angel and over the possible loss of a beloved pet. Nothing anyone says can take the pain of either away but we will always listen when you need to vent. Never apologize for feeling bad and wanting to talk about it. That is what we as friends are here for. I know to well the pain of certain days as I have been there myself and sometimes still am to an extent. Just know that it does get better though it may seem like it never will. Anytime you need to talk please feel free to contact me and if you want I will even give you my phone number if actually hearing a voice would help some.