Damia's Distractions

[Damia Rose]

An Unlikely Candidate

A man in a tired suit comes through the door and sits down in front of you, holding a tattered briefcase and peeling umbrella. His eyes dart back and forth and he shifts nervously in his seat.

So, You ask him. What makes you the best candidate for a role in this book? You cringe as you ask the question you hope to never have aimed at yourself.

Well, he clears his throat roughly as you get a whiff of cheap cologne and notice his graying hair barely concealing the balding patch beneath a greasy comb over. I haven’t really done much with fantasy or the supernatural, but I have a strong background in the sciences. He pauses and his eyes seem to shut off for a moment.

Yes, Um… he mutters as he starts to rummage through papers in his briefcase. I have a Resume here. He hands you a crumpled piece of paper that feels as if it was once a crisp impressive sheet. As you can see, I’ve studied many fields such as astrophysics, physics, molecular biology, bio-chem., and psychology to name a few, so you as the author don’t have to worry about explaining to me the scientific ins and outs of things. I’ll pick them up pretty easily as I go. I’ve also had some public speaking engagements as you can see, as well as experience working with teens. You look on the sheet and see he has listed his debate team from college, a mere 20 years old, and a short stint as a high school teacher that seems to have lasted a grand total of 6 weeks about 4 years ago.

I’m also extremely flexible for scheduling concerns, and can be available at all hours of the day or night, seven days a week, and am not at all adverse to doing any and all stunts required. He pauses again, noticing he sounds a little too eager.

You look at him closer and notice the dirt scuffed boots and scratched horn rimmed glasses. You look back down at his resume, and admit that he is pretty over-qualified on the academic end of things, but you still have a few questions for him.

So, you glance at the top of the page. Martin. I’m quite impressed with you resume, but I’m still a bit confused. You do realize that the role includes a romantic attraction to the main character.

He nods his head.

Yes, well, I’ve put a lot of thought into that actually, and I believe that portraying a romantic relationship based on intellect rather than biological attraction would be a refreshing change of pace from the typical, granting the book a sophistication lacking in other books that tend to play with the tantalizing border of romance novel rather than serious fiction.

You hold up your hand to stop what seems to be a long winded argument.

But the main character is a 17 year old girl… you say. His face pales, and you see sweat begin to drip down, threatening to fall into his eyes. He reaches quickly into his pocket for an old handkerchief to wipe at his forehead and you can see his hand shake.

Well… Um… that does present some difficulty. You can see the wheels in his brain start to turn as he desperately seeks a solution to what seems an insurmountable problem.

I supposed with some delicate maneuvering and a good back-story…. Aw Hell… He swears and puts his head in his hands.

You start to laugh at his complete and utter loss of professionalism.

Stand up for a second, Martin. Let me take another look at you. You try to delve beneath the dirt and grime, beneath the grubby clothes and bad hair and deep into his dark brown eyes. You smile to yourself. Yup. There it is. That spark of desperation in a man all out of options. That little bit of fear that his best just isn’t good enough. You smile. He shudders.

Congratulations Martin! His face freezes in shock. You’ve got the part.

You giggle to yourself as he stares at you in shock. Now this is going to be fun.