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Untitled (Five minute poem needing much help.)

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hospitalflowers

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PostPosted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 7:33 am


As said in the title, this poem needs much help, would you not agree?

These attempts are very fruitless,
We are far from achieving our goals.
As every day comes to an end,
Many are torn away from their lives.
But as they die, another is born.
Doomed to the tragic
Mortal
Fate.
PostPosted: Wed Apr 23, 2008 2:36 pm


Poetry is not my strong point but I like the form. I think if you had a image in your head, it would help this be more developed.

Queeny
Captain

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Poetry

 
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