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 Posted: Sat May 17, 2008 10:41 am
Me and my family moved to New Mexico about seven months ago for my husbands job.
Ever since we got here it's been a nightmare.
The first week my husbands boss started becomeing hostile towards him and it is still going on. If it wern't for his bosses boss he would have been fired a long time ago.
My Husband is a profesional who just passed his national bord exam this past month. All the other workers their ask him why he puts up with her (his boss) crap when he can get a job anywhere and make more money than here.
Unfortunatly he is under contract for a year or he will get sued for the sign on bonus unless he is fired.
My daughter we found out a week after we got here that she is way behind in math (which she was ahead in back in Michigan where we came from)and it was her best subject.
She was just starting reading with special ed, she has a slow learning process when it come's to rading and she is about 2 grade levels behind.
So I knew she would feel upset and like she couldn't do anything right.
So I contacted the school the same week we got here to talk with her Teacher to speak with her about it and she never called back all I got waqs a letter basicaly stating that she has personal and profestional obligation's and would not be able to speak with me unless I made an apointment (so she could get paid). Needless to say it got worse. The kids where making fun of my daughter and saying awfull things she became detached in class which I just found out about the datached part just a few days ago. She would only open up in her special ed class away from all the other kids. (This is not normal for my daughter she is always helping other kids happy and out going and sticks up for anyone geting picked on.)
This problem just goes on and on I can't even list them all. I had to put her in karate so she could have some self confedince and we talked with the sin-sa their about the situation and they agreed to work with her and she has blossomed there.
I did bring this problem to the teachers attn. Quite a few times through this year. Of course she said I didn't and she said it is just prejudisness against my daughter because the mexicans don't like the whites here. And maybe she dosn't get along with mexican's ----FIRST OFF SOME OF HER COUSINTS ARE MEXICANS AND SHE IS BEST FRIENDS WITH THEM.
But I think people here do have prejudice against other people and it is not for just that reason.
Anyway we want out of here bad we all hate it here. My husband may try to get fired from work (funny hu- wanting to get fired). We can't have our daughter in the schools here I keep geting sick with alergies every other month and my husband works in a hostile situation.
What should we do we feel desperat to get out and depressed cause we are not sure how. We still have 5 months on our less and 6 on the contract.
We want to go to florida where we have alot of family.
Me my daughter and husband feel as tho we just want to be wraped in famiy so it's either florida or michigan and my arthritist can't handel michigan anymore. Other workers are telling him that geting fired won't hurt his carear. That most of them where fired their first time in the field and they ended up geting a better and better paying job. Any Advise.
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Posted: Sun May 18, 2008 5:42 pm
damn thats one bad thing after another... well obviously staying doesnt sound much like an option or else youre looking at living in hell for the next year. can your husband give back the bonus he recieved so he doesnt get sued and if not, how much would he be sued for. there should be some loop hole that would let him out of his contract if hes being verbally abused making it an uncomfortable workplace. it shouldnt be any different than men harrassing women in the workplace and getting fired for it. i would go where family is and if michigan is not an option, then go to florida
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Posted: Sat May 24, 2008 5:52 pm
The other option is geting fired the money he would have to pay back would be close to 9grand and that's not an option. He has been working per diem for another doctore who is going to write him a glowing recomendation and has told him not to stay at his other job and that he dosn't have to put up with it.
The other guy who he works thats doing his evaluation at the bad boss place has contacted his people in florida to get my husband a job and is going to help him get fired before he leaves on june 1st. He had also aplyed to a full time job down their across the street from the other on and the other one will be only per diem but she told him that the full time one will definatly hire him.
So the fireing meeting is some time this week and everything is paked and we are ready to move. We are leaving in about a week and a half or sooner depending on a few things. We are going to stay with my brother and sister in law for 2 weeks till we find a house to rent. My internet and everything is going to be shut off by the end of the week so I'll be off line for about a month and a half. Thanks for the advise.
I would not recomend moving here to live but visiting would be awsome it realy is pretty and their is alot to see.
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Posted: Sun May 25, 2008 3:15 pm
Oh hun, I'm so sorry to hear that you've had all these problems ((hugs))
I hope that all goes well for you over the next month, and that things settle down at the new, new school with your daughter. Just bare in mind that you are not alone in what you have gone through here. Changing states can be difficult due to the culture challenges and clashes, and quite often many companies lose their highly qualified and fantastic workers simply due to the fact that the change in culture is too unbearable. You however (or more to the point your husband) had all this to deal with on top of being 'bullied' which IMHO is what you are saying here, and the company should have provided support for your husband since they were willing to transfer him all the way over there.
I do think therefore you are making the right decision, and moving back to the states is right for you. Most of us struggle being away from family, and things that are familiar, but the main thing is, you have all tried to make the best of things where you were, but it just wasn't right for you..
we made a similar move (only for us it was from one county to another), and I have never felt so isolated or loney in all my life.. It was hell, only worse.. then we moved here, and even though I am still miles away from my family, we just seemed to fit right in. It still took us about a year to settle down properly, and cope with being away from family, but we didn't have the issues with schools or the locals like we had had previously.. Now I wouldn't move anywhere ever again..
Please let us know how you get on when you do get back online, and no matter what happens, we're here for you
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Posted: Sun May 25, 2008 9:06 pm
im glad to hear things are working somewhat for you. even though it sucks having to pack what you just unpacked, at least this time things look like it will be looking up for you guys. i hope your daughter will be able to go back to the way she was before when she goes to a new school. i think its going to be her that this will effect the most because kids remember these kind of things when they grow up.
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Posted: Tue Jun 03, 2008 9:30 am
oh dear,im so sorry to hear what is happening with you,its one bad thing after another,i found that no matter where you go you will deal with prejudice,but if i was your husband i would get myself fired too!! as for the school yes yall need to get out of there it will only get worse for her if yall stay i will be praying for you and your family and wish yall the best of luck!!!!!may god be with yall on your move!!!!!if you ever need to talk im always hear to listen smile ~huggels~
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